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Rohit (engineer)     04 December 2014

Wife forcing me to transfer property in her na

Hi,

We married 4 years back .My wife left home after quarrel with me. After two days when I was planning to bring her back, her parents were trying to lodge false police complaints.  It hurted me a lot because wife was mute spectator on all this non-sense.  When I asked her about this she said I’m not aware of these steps by her parents.  Her mother once openly threatened me of dowry case.  I never hurt her physically. I bent down because of my 2.4 years old daughter. I have strong proofs with me that I never took any kind of dowry or gifts from them.  When I went to bring her back she put a condition that I need to transfer my share in the residential property (I got share from property of my mother that she was legal heir of her father) in her name that I opposed strongly but I agreed to put my property in joint names as I do not want my daughter without father or mother.  She is working women and never spends a penny and saving her money. I’m bearing all the expenses of my family.

                                Now, I’m going to sell my share in the property of my deceased mother planning to put half in her name.

 What would be the disadvantages of this step?

 What would happen if we took divorce in future?

 

  I’m not giving my property to her as a gift but I’m bounded and no option left with me. Either I can save property or my family. I chose family.



Learning

 9 Replies

malipeddi jaggarao (retired banker)     04 December 2014

You have chosen the family rightly.  You are yielding to her demand to give share of your property.  You have some property in your name and would like to split it and sell 50%(your share) and register the balance 50% in her name.  Am I right?

Marriage is a trust not only between two persons but between two families.  If you have not demanded dowry, not done anything wrong, why do you worry about the threats of her parents.  She is also earning and saving the entire salary in her own name.  Is it family?  Are you destined to be a servant to her?  Whatever income both of you earn, would go to family pot and should be useful and available to each and every member of the family in case of need.  

Yes, you have a daughter and you love her and feel concern that she should not be deprived of any one of the parents.  That does not mean you have to bow your head before your wife or her parents for their unreasonable conditions.  Today this is the condition.  Tomorrow there will some more conditions.  You are living in the society, you have certain rights, responsibilities and duties towards every member of the family and society.  

It appears the nuisance creators are her parents.  The best thing is, promise her to meet her demands, bring her back and live for sometime.  You forget about her demands and behave normally showing love and affection towards your wife and daughter.  Slowly you can tell her that your life is important and listening to the advice of parents and creating problem in her own life will not be good for her.  Property, money and material things come and go, the love and affection between the wife and husband would long lasting till we die.  Slowly she will understand.  You should be tactful in dealing such persons.  But surrendering totally is of no use and it will have negative impact and you can never correct the situation later.  All the best for you.

1 Like

Rohit (engineer)     04 December 2014

Thank you Mr Jaggarao,

I'm selling my whole share in the land and would be buying another house and whole money will be put into that i.e My earnings and My savings. Selling of dwelling house is in process as it is not in my hands and we will be getting promised amount soon. She is saving money but I do not have any problem in that. My daughter is center point of affection between us and in future if we stayed together she will spend those savings in daughter marriage, education etc It is fine for me. But the situations and acts like above distract trust and needs a lot of time to forget those pains. But who knows what is  written in the destiny so just for an instance we failed to settle together what will be done about property? I'm just trying to get precautions because no-one can swear about mind of an individual.

Thank you for your valuable time

Rohit (engineer)     04 December 2014

And yes, I not really afraid of any fake cases but I'm afraid of my relationship. We are just of opposite nature and incompatible. I lived in a joint family system and she grown up in Nuclear family.  When she say something I got angry sometime and cool off soon. But when her parents start Interfering then it becomes unbearable for me. Her parents push her to ask for separate share and get out of joint family. For example I shown some residential plots to my wife but she said these are not good and we won't buy any of them. I shown the same plots to her parents and they liked the location very much and told her daughter that these are good plots and she got ready. The question of problem is that when husband who is going to spend money is telling to buy particular plot she is not ready and when parents said she got ready. My wife used to get advice from her family & friends more than me. These points can pinch anybody.

Rohit (engineer)     04 December 2014

And yes, I not really afraid of any fake cases but I'm afraid of my relationship. We are just of opposite nature and incompatible. I lived in a joint family system and she grown up in Nuclear family.  When she say something I got angry sometime and cool off soon. But when her parents start Interfering then it becomes unbearable for me. Her parents push her to ask for separate share and get out of joint family. For example I shown some residential plots to my wife but she said these are not good and we won't buy any of them. I shown the same plots to her parents and they liked the location very much and told her daughter that these are good plots and she got ready. The question of problem is that when husband who is going to spend money is telling to buy particular plot she is not ready and when parents said she got ready. My wife used to get advice from her family & friends more than me. These points can pinch anybody.

malipeddi jaggarao (retired banker)     05 December 2014

You have understanding capacity and concern to your wife and daughter.  I do not foresee any problem.  Keep your in-laws at distance as far as possible.  Do not encourage them to interfere in your affairs.  Your wife develop trust and the matters will be okay.  

Have a Heart Foundation (Sales & Mktng)     05 December 2014

check your pm

Adv k . mahesh (advocate)     05 December 2014

yes why you make your in laws to interfere in your matrimonial issue talk to her about the issue and solve it before it goes off your hand.

ragz hyder (PM)     05 December 2014

Do NOT tranfer your property to her or joint na,e. Period. Later there could me maintenance 498A etc. So have money on your name.

Rohit (engineer)     06 December 2014

Thank you all of you for your valuable advices. Specially Mr Jaggarao. 

Mr Jaggarao answer shows positive vibrations and practically his answer comes with experience and age.


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