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Nandha (NIL)     08 January 2013

Reconciliation at police station

Dear ld. experts,

 

Wife left with kid 7 months back. Husband tried to bring her back through relatives but nothing worked.

 

Now, Wife's father and brothers, came to police station and complained about physical violence. Policemen were sent to husband's house and took husband to police station. In front of police officer, wife's brother & father asked me  to return wife's & kid's clothes as they were wearing old & rubbish clothes (jewels & other valuables were taken away by wife when she left home).

 

Wife's brother showed a Govt. hospital's OPD receipt alongwith doctor's prescripttion stating 'injury' and told that husband physically abused  wife. 

 

After hearing both sides, the police officer asked me whether to accept her back or want to go for legal battle. I asked him tocheck with my wife  first whether she is willing to come back. The officer called my wife on phone and she agreed to come only if I pick up her at her house. However, I asked the police officer  to give me a day's time to think about it and let him know. 

 

My queries are:

 

Wife had earlier threatened of 'dowry harrassment case' & 'domestic violence' case when she left home and they had also obtained  evidence (though a false one) with the aim of harassing me.   They were spreading false rumours about me. Even now, they came  to  police station to claim her clothes (old ones which became unfit for her) instead of reconciliation. 

 

Their actions seem to be suspicious. May be they might have got enough evidence to file cases against me. 

 

Any precaution to be taken by me?? Still I feel something fishy because when a wife was not even ready to accept letters, called him 'a psycho', 'murderer', accused him of phyical violence and was spreading bad rumours about hushand's character, how come she suddenly agrees to live with husband just on a phone call?

 

For the sake of my kid, I have decided to accept her back. Will that mean I condoned all her cruelties she has done to me? If case, if she was again the same and if i go for legal battle, will the cruelties done by her before this reconcilation be considered or not? Please advise.

 

Thanks.

 

 

https://www.lawyersclubindia.com/forum/Is-it-right-time-to-proceed--72761.asp#.UOu9H7Bigfg



 13 Replies

Akshay Sahni (Founder/Partner)     08 January 2013

You need to decide wheather you would want to stay with your wife or not. Do not need to be scared of false complaints which can be filed by your wife. All you have to do is file a intimation letter to the local police station marked to the Police Commissoner stating the facts in details, which could be of help in future.

 

For further queries please visit our firm's website www.indialawhelp.com

 

Regards

Akshay Sahni

Advocate

09891982832

Tajobsindia (Senior Partner )     08 January 2013

1. It is normal to ask for cloths and certain personal belongings by other party and no need to raise alarms. Such handing over also acts as making a dialogue efforts by other party. Infact one can make list of belongings and handover with witness / her signature to end such questions then and there. Further I am always in the opinion that before even such demand arise such belonging should always be returned with witness vouching for the same to end one question mark once for all in future litigation or return of matrimonial harmony.

 

2. In cases where a spouse is considering to bring other spouse back and condonation of cruelties que. arise after bringing her back then my view is, unless /cohabitations as in ‘performance of s*x' between spouse takes place after bringing back with other spouse all earlier cruelties get revived. As it is construed as continuation of cruelties as allegations which gets converted later into statements which ever party takes other to Court so it does not make much sense to say 'hey I brought her back so nothing happens now in our matrimonial life" infact it all depends how situations dwells after one spouse reinstalls other spouse back to her matrimonial house!

For your main question it is going to be your personal call and donot allow any third person to sway your intuition as you are the effected party atleast I'm per se sitting on the ring side.

 

2 Like

Shonee Kapoor (Legal Evangelist - TRIPAKSHA)     08 January 2013

Two questions you have to ask yourself.

 

CAN I STAY WITH THIS WOMAN AGAIN?

AM I WILLING TO TAKE THE RISK FOR THE SAKE OF THE CHILD?

 

I faced the same dilemma, and I decided to stay again with my wife for the sake of the child. Though I was hit by 498a and all other cases, I have no regrets about the same.

 

But in your case, the decision should be yours.

 

 

 

Regards,

 

Shonee Kapoor

4 Like

JASWANT VIJAY AGNIHOTRI (AIR ARMY)     08 January 2013

i also agree with shonee sir, i think if u become agree then do a agreement which show the allegation burning and let the counter sign by police official, donot accept any beating or like that....dont sign also.....i have experience like that and i filled for divorce, police officials may move against u on bribe....so dont go her home let she should come to police station.  

1 Like

Nandha (NIL)     09 January 2013

@Akshay - thanks for your advice. There was no written complaint filed by them. They bribed the police officers and sent policemen to my home. No papers were signed by me in the police station.

 

@tajobs - Thanks.  Will this reconciliation at police station (with no formal complaints, but police wrote something in a register, taking down my & wife's number), have any impact, in case we do not rejoin and DV case is slapped against me?

 

@shonne - Thanks. I think I should take inspiration from you. You are a brave man. I can handle my wife, but the problem is her mother and cousin brother who pollute her mind. This makes me to take cautious decision. Moreover,  the allegations made at the police station by them scares me, like producing false medical certificate. I am a little afraid that she might come only to create false evidence to make her side stronger. 

 

My queries are:

 

Am I bound to inform the police officer?

What will happen if I do not go back to the police officer to inform my decision, whatever it is?

Can police take any action, if i dont convey anything to them and keep quiet?

 

In case, if I inform the police officer that I will accept my wife back, and later if I do not take her back , what action will be taken by police officer against me?

 

please advise

Thanks

 

 

Nandha (NIL)     10 January 2013

 

@ld. experts. please advise!

 

My queries are:

 

Am I bound to inform the police officer?

What will happen if I do not go back to the police officer to inform my decision, whatever it is?

Can police take any action, if i dont convey anything to them and keep quiet?

 

In case, if I inform the police officer that I will accept my wife back, and later if I do not take her back , what action will be taken by police officer against me?

 

please advise

Thanks

 

RK (adada)     10 January 2013

Mr Nandha

Your wife and inlaws are involving police for playing pressure tactics on you, Unless there is a formal complaint, Police can not act on anything.

 

Police is just trying to mediate in husband and wife matter and probably  want to settle this dispute.
 

Since your wife and her family has not initiated any legal action against you and your family, I suggest that you and your wife settle all your disputes in front of the police officer at police station.

 

Figting will not help either of you and medidiation will help sort out the problems and I believe its worth giving a chance for the future of the child who is suffering for no mistake except being born out of you and and your wife.

 

Think positively.

rajiv_lodha (zz)     10 January 2013

When family matters reach police, i dont think the relationship pulls long thereafter.

Police Station is the worst place to sattle these disputes.

Roshni B.. (For justice and dignity)     10 January 2013

in india the men and their family members have such an inflated ego that coaxing,cajoling or licking their feet to get back your streedhan or being allowed to stay respectfully in matrimonial home doesnt not always melt their hearts.even if they know in their minds they are abusive,they are not down to earth to accept their faults as they dont want to show to larki wale that they can ever be wrong.they want loads of respect even after abusing the bride.

 

 

therefore many women have to take help of police to sort out issues like those of streedhan,protection against violence if wife decides to return to matrimonial home,etc.there is no other option.this is primarily the reason to enact such laws.

Harsh (Manager)     10 January 2013

cant agree more, in my opinion, once a wife even threatens of Police/Legal, be sure that she/inlaws are fully capable and

prepared to use it anytime in future. The only person that can save it is the WIFE - as long as she doesn't give the GO AHEAD, things are in abeyance meaning suspension.

So if you can control/win your wife excellent. I have a friend in a similar situation, he has  a 1 year old kid and is working on getting his wife on his side. Her parents are losing their grip day by day.

It is all about personal choices, but I read a posting on a different forum that being in a bitter marriage for the sake of kid is equally or probably more damaging to the child. a  child needs loving parents or  worse indifferent  parents. atmosphere full of negativity and suspicion breeds really bad. good luck.  --> I dont have any kids but these are my thoughts.

Harsh (Manager)     10 January 2013

clarification: I agreed with Rajiv's comment on family matters reaching PS. thanks

Nandha (NIL)     10 January 2013

 

@rajiv, RK, Roshini, Harsh -thanks for ur comments.

 

 

But still my queries are unanswered. Can I get any expert's reply?

 

My queries are:

 

-Am I bound to inform the police officer whether i am taking her back or not?-

-What will happen if I do not go back to the police officer to inform my decision, whatever it is?

-Can police take any action, if i dont convey anything to them and keep quiet?

 

In case, if I inform the police officer that I will accept my wife back, and later if I do not take her back, what action will be taken by police officer against me?

 

please advise

 

Thanks

Shonee Kapoor (Legal Evangelist - TRIPAKSHA)     11 January 2013

1. Yes, you are bound to inform the Police Officer and close the complaint.

2. Any game playing etc., or false statements would adversely affect your case.

 

PS: If you can not stand for your kid, what else would you stand for???? Brave or not, the cases would come if they have to come. If you have faith and trust left, give it a try. Otherwise fight the cases right now.

 

 

 

Regards,

 

Shonee Kapoor

 

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