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sagar shinde (student)     05 September 2012

precautions b4 marriage and while in marriage to avoid 498a

First of all, I am sorry to put this question over here. I dont want to hurt anyone.

Q. 1) How can a boy assure before marriage that girl and her family is good enough and will not take a decision of 498a in hasty manner.

2) Based on your experiences guys can you tell some of those "dangerous signals" that you ignored from girl/ her family in your married life or before your married life that lead to 498a against you. ?

3) Did any one of you found any "specific behavior' from in-laws objectionable before fixing mariage that you might have ignored it?

4) Why will a girl takes a decision of 498a sometimes within 15 days of marriage? or period on avg. is very less. 15 days to 1 yr

5) What are the things that you will suggest one must check before getting married that such a disastor wont haapen? For ex: a) Assessing girls family on social grounds and their place in society  b) Girls family social status  c) Girls opinions on particular things blah blah... assessign these things will help at least to be sure that family wont take any decision hastily?

Regards

sagar



Learning

 5 Replies

Amit (NA)     05 September 2012

Refer to 498A.org that has plenty of info. Especially it mentions symptoms of 498A-woman prior to marriage and post marriage behavior that indicates an incoming 498A.

On a broader level, you are not safe if you marry urban educated woman (especially those who had a boyfriend which today is almost all urban educated ones).

Also note that ultimately aim of 498A is extortion of money, so make sure your and your wife's financial situation is such that your maintenance liability is least. And never ever purchase property on your name. Never have kids until you are confident that your marriage is going good and this confidence should last at least one year before you take a decision to have kids.

Good luck.

Tajobsindia (Senior Partner )     05 September 2012

Just two street smart (alleged to be wise) tailor made suggestions;

ONE –
Do not ever get married till Family Law in India gets “gender neutral” tag. Indian Marriage does not come with lifetime warrantees as you are asking us to spoonfeed you. Instead opt for surrogacy and life time have company of liberl outlook girl friend(s) with no bars of security to them attached. For medieval parents mindset buy them leather bound up-to-date volumes of AIR / SCC to study in their retirement age to divert their nagging upon adult children(s) resolve. Contemporary Indian Society will accept your street smart decision donot worry about society.

TWO – Invest consulting with mentors such as Harish Salve or Mukul Rohtagi or Meenakshi Lekhi and get nearly foolproof pre Nuptial Agreement made followed by jointly registering the same within scope of Indian laws and then marry if you want to taste the tart.

Addendum:
If above two were too much Igyan to digest then during particular marrital relationship phase lifetime pay retainership fees to a sesoned Advocate and pronto get married with no ifs and buts and or over research "marriage" subject. The hired retainer will bail you out during each steps when in marital turmoil with his seasoned advises if any afterall what for retainership per mensum s/he was charging you for !

 

Reasoning:
Precious youthful productive years are not for spending endless nites on 498a.org and or SIFF yahoo group and or even scanning tons of past LCI messages if one is so scared of “marriage” word. Life in India is for enjoining the youth’s fruits one toiled for with a 'just' better half. For all those backend worries above two suggestions are sufficient if carefully one follows.

Jakar (abc)     23 November 2012

First of all I would congratulate you that you have awareness about 498a even before marriage.When you start looking for a match you should firstly see the biodata of the girl carefully like her educational background,parents' profession,brothers,sisters and other relatives.This will give you some idea about the family.Then you should try to have more and more meetings with the girl and family before taking any decision.In every meeting,you should try to make out the various characteristices of the girls family.

Regarding behavior,you should see whom is the girl most close to in her family.You should see how much is the girls family possessive about the girl or how much concern they have for you or their girl.For eg.if you are ill someday,whether they call you and ask about your health or so.Whether the girls side are showing considerate behavior for the boy or not.You should read a lot of blogs and other content about 498a on the internet.

Rest leave it to God!!! Good Luck!!!


(Guest)

Hello Sagar Shinde,

There is a document prepared by SIFF(Save Indian Family Foundation)  which enlightens Warnings/Precautions for Bachelors who are about to be married in India.

Pls reply me with your e-mail id, i can provide you the same.

--
Thanks,
Mani


(Guest)

Check this link:-

https://www.scribd.com/doc/106788620/Warning-for-Indian-Bachelors

 

BR, Mani


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