kiran (employee) 26 September 2013

Divorce petition by wife

Hi Sir/Madam

Could you please read my case and give me some suggestion. I request please read below may be very big case detail and a unique case what I am facing

I have married in the year June -2012, by she left the matrimonial house in 4 days. One fine day/5th her father came and taken her parental house without giving any reason to me.

Later when I and my parent / other elders approached them (she and her parents other elders were in the meeting). They actually hided the reason(I have explained in last but one para) why they taken her and keep on blaming me saying I am not good person, I am harassing her and other blames - even her father extended a step and told that I raped her and horrible words/cursed on me. Later we have exchange of words in that meetings.

After couple of month’s i.e in the month of January - 2013 they asked us for filing MCD and we both filed MCD in family court. In that MCD we signed the term and conditions that.

1. Our thoughts and opinions are not match

2. Not even a single day we stayed each other

3. There is no dowry given or taken/ nor financial commitment among us.

4. Marriage not consummated etc.

But the court of law has dismissed because MCD filed less than 1 year. It is my bad luck.

Then after 1 year in the month of June-2013, our lawyer prepared the MCD petition and we both signed on that documents with affidavits and we are about to file/present the same infront of justice, but suddenly girl and girl father left the court without presenting before the judge.

Now the situation reversed, we and our lawyer tried to call them again and again still they convenience to come for MCD and neither those people ready to continue the matrimonial relationship.

Finally Now

That lady filed Divorce petition in the court with following blames.

1. She been harassed by me, I have beaten her.

2. I am mental no maturity etc. other allegations

3. I shout on the road etc.

4. I have taken 3 lakh dowry and other marriage expenses and total of 8 lakh.

And pleading the court of law to grant Divorce.

Now the court has send summons to my Old address, because I was vacated that house summons returned back to court. But I got above information that she filed a petition in court as the case number displayed in court and it was informed by my lawyer. They even know my present address with door number, colony and intentionally giving the wrong address in the court., for this I have evidence/proof that she/her parent have my alternative address details.

Please let me know what I should do.

1. Is it fine if I keep silent without filing memorandum to court of my alternative/new address and then they keep on sending summons, later advertisement in newspaper about the divorce petition and finally court give exparte decree. ? – will there be problem for me and what kind of proof that court will give to me for exparte decree, I mean will court gives me any document on exparte decree to me?

2. If I attend the court - Whether our written consent statements filed at the time of MCD will be evidence for argument i.e. no dowry or financial relationship among us.

3. Presently I don’t have any property or ‘0” bank balance and no Job – then court will insist me to pay the dowry or marriage expenses to that lady? – how to escape

4. I am not willing or not in a position to pay any single pie to her.

5. My final pray is to get rid of her

Indeed because of them I lost the job as everyone discussing in office that “my wife left” – I was mentally disappointed and quit the job. Even in the relative I am mentally disappointed with this issue.

INDEED SHE CHEATED BE – I came know-----

That she has a boyfriend and she still maintaining relationship with him, but I don’t have any strong evidence to prove that it is only collective or corroborative evidence.

Additionally one day I have created wrong email account on the name of her boyfriend and started online chatting with her as her boyfriend and then I got to understand because of him she is asking divorce from me and unnecessarily blaming me. I don’t know whether take this as evidence in court of law. Literally for no reason I am fooled by her and her family. I was alone and leading my life unnecessarily they entered to my life and disturbed my life

Finally how to escape from below and defend ourselves - (indeed her father has given 3 lakhs to my brother’s bank account with that money we have purchased Rs 255600 worth of gold and given to in the form of gift balance 25000 cloths to her, her father, her mother and with rest money I purchased cloths but we don’t have any evidence that we have gifted to her or her parents i.e jewellary or clothes) additionally I have taken loan of 5.26 lakh as part of marriage expenses which we are still paying EMI’s.

Please guide how to defend my self and get rid of her and how fast I will get divorce as she filed divorce petition

What I should say in court to get rid of her.

Thank you

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8 Replies

Samir N (General Queries) (Business) 27 September 2013

Do not rush into anything at this time. Just buy time. Invent every excuse possible. If you are not served the summon yet, avoid taking service. Fall sick. Get medical certificates. Get admitted for a few days in hospital. Your main weapon is her extra-marital affair but that has no evidentiary value based upon what you are describing. Hire a licensed private detective and get solid proof. The private detective MUST be licensed otherwise you are breaking the law. Then you have him file an affidavit in Court with all his observations and photographic evidence. Cross-examine him as your witness. The rest is easy. Pay the private detective on a pay-as-he-gets evidence basis with some advance. Do not pay the entire amount upfront. In the mean time, pretend that you want her back. Send a RCR notice asking for restoration of conjugal rights. In this notice write to her that you are willing to forgive her if she returns back and withdraws her divorce petition. Tell her that you still love her. Be Mr. Devdas for some time until you get all the evidence you need. Trust no one with your strategy. Even tell your advocate that you want her back. That is important because you can be sure that your advocate will discuss everything with the opposing party hoping to get some bribes from that side. In any event, you must always make your advocate feel that you trust him like your brother but in reality trust him as much as you would trust the devil himself!

Do not discuss the hiring of private detective with even your best friend, let alone your advocate. As you know that advocates are like prostitutes. Your advocate will sell this info to your wife's advocate and she will be looking behind all the time to see if she is been followed. As for friends, they may talk about it inadvertently with their friends. Use your advocate only like you would use a dog. To bark... in Court and to pass misinformation to the opposite party. You plan and decide your strategy yourself. Do a lot of reading on divorce laws and cases. Never sign on a filing prepared by your advocate unless you have read it thoroughly at least two days in advance and incorporated changes that you want. I won in Family Court, MM Court, High Court, etc... all on my own with my ex- hiring an army of advocates. I started representing myself after finding out what my advocate was doing behind my back. I changed my advocate but the second one was no better in terms of ethics or knowledge. Then I realized that their breed is infected with a low IQ and lack of ethics. So, do take my advice seriously for your own good. Law is very easy to learn especially if you come from a science background.

If you want to lose the case and have it dragged on for years, then rely only on an advocate, trust him 100% and do nothing yourself. GOOD LUCK!!!

get_strong (engineer) 27 September 2013

Hi Samir,

good thing ,you represented and argued for yourself in the court.For that did you started learning laws and sections? how many years it took you for getting rid of all cases in all courts?

Samir N (General Queries) (Business) 27 September 2013

@Hema: It takes no more than one month, with two hours reading per day, to be fully aware of all basic procedures, Acts, etc. which are relevant to matrimonial disputes. Learning matrimonial law is an ongoing process but then the process in India is so slow that you have all the time in the world to do so. I would take material to read while I was waiting for my case inside or outside the Court. In matrimonial cases, the nature of the beast is such that delay is inevitable with mandatory counselling, long appeal process, etc. It took me a total of four years to get divorced and the appeal in the High Court disposed of in my favor. The DV case also took almost the same time... I prevailed everywhere in all cases but that was because all cases filed against me were frivolous. Post-divorce, I filed petition to restrain her from using my surname and for misc. relief. That is pending. I have now filed civil proceedings against her and her brother now to recover monies stolen from my account.

If you think that an advocate would have done it faster, you are totally wrong. I hired advocates in the beginning. Now, I have them but only to show up in Court when I am not there and inform the Judge that I am unable to come or for putting some signature of an advocate.

My advise to everyone: Hire Advocate Google. He knows everything about every section and Act. He knows all the cases and best of all, he is free and available 24x7.

get_strong (engineer) 27 September 2013

thanks for the needy advice samir.One thing i forgot to ask you,which place are you from?i mean in which place court preceedings happened?

and was 498 and Domeastic violence case filled simultaneously?

Samir N (General Queries) (Business) 27 September 2013

Hema, though my case was in North India, it really does not matter because HMA, 498, DV, etc are all national and not state-specific laws (may be exception could be J&K). Looks like you want to file all these cases on your husband in which case please ask him to contact me so that I can help him -:)

get_strong (engineer) 27 September 2013

Hi samir,

jokes apart. :) No, i have no intentions to file any cases against my husband.But may be he wants to file for divorce,as he is eager to remarry!!!! ... :P definitely will ask him to contact you :P my concern was , in banglore,there could be lot of family court cases running,and people say it takes many years for the cases to end....

Personla mail ID: mail2hemap@gmail.com

T. Kalaiselvan, Advocate (Advocate) 29 September 2013

Kiran,

If your wife side have intentionally quoted wrong address in the court on the petition for divorce for service of notice to you, why do you bother about the things happening at your back or in the dark. If at all they are bent upon getting an ex-parte order against you, feel happy that you got rid of her without any cost. Moreover, they have not filed any case for dowry harassment or domestic violence, so if they are filing an executive petition for enforcing the court order for maintenance amount, if any and if you receive a notice on it, contest the case afresh then, until then set aside all your worries about nothing. Advocate Kalaiselvan, 9443441062

Reformist !!! (Other) 12 December 2013

Yea Samir, same is the case for me. I have won 1 of my case and is troubling the other party in other cases.

Fighting yourself is really very enjoying and i am enjoying while fighting my own cases without any lawyers support and lawyer represents me only when i am not in court, same as u.

The other party is getting frustrated gradually as i have learnt abt the laws and now the truth is coming out in courts.

God Bless these unscruplous ladies who made me hellbent to learn these laws. I owe my success to my lovely lovely wife ..............Lol