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Manish (a)     08 February 2012

Divorce on medical grounds

 

Hi im manish from pune,

wanted help to understand course of action for my issue. Pls do go thru and help with your advice.

I have been married for almost 3-4 years. It was an arranged marriage. Within 2-3 months i could see a lot of mood swings in my wife's behaviour. i came to know that she was secretly going to meet some doctor for some treatments...mind, body cleanzing etc. What horrified me was the symtoms which she had disclosed to the doctor included...suicidal thoughts.!!

Within 6 months, our marriage was in shambles with her feeling that our entire family were against her and wanted to harm her. She had started showing signs of depression, suspision, anger, fear etc. Since her health was also not so good..we showed her to a doctor who after a few tests suggested we meet a psychiatrist.

It was after a number of visits to the doctor that we were informed that she was suffering from mental disorder - schizophrenia. The next 1-2 years had been filled with periods of visits to doctor, counselling, admissions to hospital etc. Each with an intermittant period of some recovery...then as in almost all schizophrenic patients...avoiding taking medicines...relapse of symtoms and the cycle of visits again. She had also tried taking overdosages of medicies 1-2 times in failed attempts to end her life.

Last 1-2 years...she is not listening to anybody's advise, stopped taking medicines, doesnt do any household work, every few months goes back to her parents place and spends months there.

In the last 4 years we have tried talking to her parents...but we only get excuses-

-that there is nothing wrong with her, she was fine before marriage, she is just a little sensitive, we have not been taking good care of her, etc.

Last 1 year...she has spent almost 9 months with her parents at nagpur. Last time she was at our house at pune, she had started becoming violent with the family members verbally and sometimes physically. All this as if to take revenge from us. In her sober state she would hear voices...i had to literally send her back to her parents for fear of her harming us or herself.

My inlaws do not talk much on this topic and just say, she is now taking medicines or she is fine, nothing about our future together, divorce or separation. 

Post marriage life has become hell not only for me but also my family members.

Need help to understand:

1) Can i initiate divorce in above case. If so, on what grounds, and what options are available to me. Is there any advantage / disadvantage to person initiating the divorce.

2) Can my inlaws blame our family and drag us to court by saying that we are responsible for her condition. Since this is a mental problem, how can we prove that her illness was pre marriage.

3) can the marriage be considered as null and void as we did not know of her mental illness at time of marriage. Her family states that she was fine before marriage. how do we prove this illness is pre / post marriage. We have medical reports stating her hospitalization and presence of illness.

4) My wife used to work before marriage and worked for a year or so post marriage. As of now she is in no condition to work. Am i liable to pay alimony in such a case. if so how is the amount decided. Since she wasnt keeping well since beginning of marriage, i had decided not to have kids until her illness subsides.

regards

manish



Learning

 28 Replies

DEFENSE ADVOCATE.-firmaction@g (POWER OF DEFENSE IS IMMENSE )     08 February 2012

 

The moment wife shows some human weakness  the man is after divorce as if others are waiting  in queue to bat with him again.

 

You have failed in your choice being a man you are more responsible at least morally. You want to cover your failure of choice by blaming others , it will dissipate your energy .So now learn to live in peace . Compromise  with what events have placed on your platter.

 

 In a storm there is violent activity at periphery or top and center and bottom is calm silent. Learn to go to center or bottom of storm and you can come out unscathed.

jayshree (Inspector)     08 February 2012

good morning sir,

I read Mr Manish case, I have few questions regarding this matter. why it is not possible he can get divorce from his wife, if she has phychological problem and she can not perform her duties as a wife, as a daughter in law?. Why should Mr Manish suffer his entire life?

DEFENSE ADVOCATE.-firmaction@g (POWER OF DEFENSE IS IMMENSE )     08 February 2012

Law will ask you to provide for her for rest of life than only you will get divorce or even  MCD.

dr.pawan rajyan (member and secretory)     08 February 2012

manish if you have proof/dr.slip of diagnosis of SCHIZOPHRENIA(no matter after or before marriage,because it have almost no solution) then you can get divorce on this ground.but you have to give maintainance because a patient of  schizophernia cann't be supposed to work.regards 

jayshree (Inspector)     08 February 2012

Sir

How can we proove if anyone is psycho? 


(Guest)

Dear Manish

You have to pay for your own foolishness and mistakes, As you have mentioned that  "have been married for almost 3-4 years. It was an arranged marriage. Within 2-3 months i could see a lot of mood swings in my wife's behaviour. i came to know that she was secretly going to meet some doctor for some treatments...mind, body cleanzing etc. What horrified me was the symtoms which she had disclosed to the doctor included...suicidal thoughts.!!

When you discovered abnormal behaviour with 2-3 months of marriage then why didnt you initiated Divorce on Annulment grounds.

No LAW WILL GRANT YOU DIVORCE AFTER 3-4 YEARS OF MARRIAGE, THIS IS AFTER THOUGHT, however you can go for Mutual consent divorce but you have tp pay the ALIMONY TO YOUR WIFE NOW.

Remember contested divorce in India is very very tough and takes years of rounds to courts and paying lacs to the lawyers + Mental trauma and loads of other cases against you like dowry, domestic violence etc.
Unless your wife agrees to have divorce, God also can not help you from this trouble

jayshree (Inspector)     08 February 2012

If anyone is abusing to others, threating that he/she will do something wrong with his/her Life. If anyone threating frequently she will take revenge of others, on very small reasons. Is it symptoms of psycho person?

dr.pawan rajyan (member and secretory)     08 February 2012

 

How can we proove if anyone is psycho? 

jayshree,   being psycho is no ground for divorce.schizophrenia,obcessive compulsive disorder(ocd),mania,epilepsy are grounds for divorce.mental health condition is decided by psychiatrist.regards

DEFENSE ADVOCATE.-firmaction@g (POWER OF DEFENSE IS IMMENSE )     08 February 2012

But JAYSHREE  what is your locus standi in the matter.

Rahul Arjaria (Law Student)     08 February 2012

Res. Sir,

I am also going through a similar case as Mr. Manish is. I got arranged marriage in Jan'11, but on my golden night I discovered that my wife is suffering from Symmastia (A disoder where both breasts are joined leaving no cleavage). I was shocked & when I enquired further she told me that she has also got her uterus operated for fibroids. I told this to my parents immediately and my parents talked to her parents, my inlaws came & discussed the matter on the next day and apologised for the same.

My father in law was working as reader to district judge tikamgarh those days, now he is retired. My inlaws started pressurising me to continue the marriage else I would be dragged to jail along with my famly for 498a, 406 and others.

In May my wife went to her parents for her exams & I filled for annulment of marriage under sec 12-1(c) of HMA. The girl didnt appeared in court till Nov'11 & the court odered for ex-parte proceedings in my favour. My immediately appeared in Dec'11 with a Bi-parte application. In the mean time they filled for transfer of case to Tikamgarh but the case was transferred to Gwalior.

I have an affidavid signed by my wife in open court stating that she herself and her parents cheated on me & now she is leaving me forever. Also I have some diary entries & letters written by my wife where she has admitted that she herself & her parents cheated on me & took my consent by fraud. Also I have all the medical prescripttions and operation papers which she had undergone before marriage & without my consent.

No 498a, or 406 or any other case been filled yet as I informed the matter to the supritendent of police earlier.

Please advise me further so as to save my life and get the marriage annulled. Will I be able to do so...??

DEFENSE ADVOCATE.-firmaction@g (POWER OF DEFENSE IS IMMENSE )     08 February 2012

It is a long process continue no easy and early remedy.

Rahul Arjaria (Law Student)     08 February 2012

Can I file 21(b) of HMA for early disposal of case i.e. within six months from the date of appearance of the respondent. Would that help?


(Guest)

you have already got the exparte divorce, what else do you need?

Rahul Arjaria (Law Student)     08 February 2012

Actually the court had odered for ex-parte proceedings that is the respondent is given 45 days time to appear and present their application for bi-parte procedings which the court generally accepts. My wife has appeared with her prayer for bi-parte, however it has to be decided...!!


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