Child custody

since both the children are above the age of five years the opinion of the children as to with whom they wish to live matters a lot in deciding the case.you also show the proofs which subcanciate your claim that you were taking care of all the childs expenses.as mother of your child your wife will definitely get visitation rights.

Originally posted by : bosco
	Myself and wife do not live together for the past 2 years due to some mis understanding and a divorce case is under progress. Children are with me. My son is aged 10 and daughter 14. Children are taken care by me well and by my parents. My wife has filed a child custody under section 7 of guardian and ward act.  The court has given hearing during the month of October. I spend for all the children school & other activities.. My children do not want to go my wife even for a single moment. Under this circumstances I am not aware of what is the court procedure for hearing. I want to retain the child custody with me. What should I do in the court. If she opts for visitation rights---- will the court grant visitation to her even if the children do not want to meet and stay with her? Can experts elaborate the procedure. thanks Bosco

Better maintain strict vigil with regard to who the kids meet.  I suggest you to not let the mother meet the kids, first let her resolve matters with you and then seek visitation rights.  Even if she gets visitation rights and also custody of kids it is entirely up to the will of the kids whom they want to live with, not adhereing to court order in this matter wont draw prosecution. and if she has intentions of kidnapping your kids then court cannot do anything in tis regard.

thanks experts, I am confident on the kids and also  they (wife side)  cannot kidnap the kids but can i refuse visitation rights of mother until she resolve the matter with me   I am confused by this word? can you elaborate Mr. prakash. 

Originally posted by : bosco
	thanks experts, I am confident on the kids and also  they (wife side)  cannot kidnap the kids but can i refuse visitation rights of mother until she resolve the matter with me   I am confused by this word? can you elaborate Mr. prakash.

She has problem with you, let her resolve issue with you first then let her come back if she is willing to.  

Both the children reached to such an age (legally it is called they have fully developed cognitive sense), the judge will call the children in his chamber and find out their preferance, with whom they would like to stay.  Next consideration before the judge is that the welfare of the children - with whom if the children stay, their welfare is well protected?  On both these counts, you have clear upper hand and hence, you would get permanent custody.  But, despite the children's objections or your reservations, the court will certainly grant visitation rights to the mother as for the healthy growth of children, both parents' affection is immanent.  How the visitation rights will be granted is completely in the court's discretion and you can intervene in such orders for necessary amendments, if any of visitation rights granted to her put inconvenience to you or the children.  But her right for visitation of children cannot be outrightly denied.

Prabhakar - Advocate

(M)9958670740

Legal Aid Panelist - Central Delhi (Tis Hazari).

Think twice, its never too late in your case, try to take wife back, as children need love and affection of mother and the father equally for their mental and overall growth, just money wont be enough to bring up children in right way.  Eithics are more important.

Thanks experts for all your advices and elaborate guidance.     The court has given first  notice to me  with a statement from my wife side and has asked me to file written statement.    how long this case will go?   whether the children would be counselled by the counsellors two three times  or in the first instance of me filling the written statemnt itself the judge will call the children to her chamber.

Experts can you highlight on this

thanks.

@ Author . 

Ist good that she has filed for custody under gaurdians and wards act . So you are at an advantage . Had she to file for temporary custody underr section 21 under the protection of women domestic violence act 2005  . The court would temporiarly transfer the children into her custody as under the domestic violence  act there is no provision for man to have the custody of the children, hence you arre deemed lucky .

visitation would be granted to her under the Gaurdians and wards act after taking into consideration the childrens interview by the court  . It would be advisable not to deny her that right as the both the children require both the parents .And if she too is working than she too would have to contribute towards the child maintenance . Even if her visitation right is denied in this case . She would approach the sessions court than the high court and than the supereme court and one day she would surely be allowed visitation . Court cases take a long time might be this case make take around 2-3 yrs and than the next and the next . And you end up wasting your harrd earned time and money on these court cases .  

Mr. Stanley thanks for your advice,  and got your very valuable point.  but under the domestic violence act whether the court will  not consider the age (above 5 years)  and wishes of the children?? and nterview the children before  ordering or granting temporary custody of children to her ??

Please advice.

@ Author 

Yes court will consider the wishes of the children than wife and her lawyer will start crying after hearing the replies of the child this is a case of hostile aggressive parrenting . wife will seduce the judge just crying and crying :-) . and as the saying goes you know your wiffe betterr in court :-)

Hostile aggressive parenting is child abuse

Hostile aggressive parents are not capable of appreciating the needs of their child, and usually view their child as a possession belonging to them alone and no other person, especially the other parent that the HAP parent is targeting. The disorder varies in severity from parent to parent. While some parents resort to insulting the other parent in front of the child on a daily basis, another parent insists on relocating the child without reason. Some parents will even make false accusations of s*xual abuse on the children in an attempt to destroy the child's relationship with the other parent.

A child naturally feels affection for both parents. When one parent behaves in a consistently hostile manner towards the other, and exerts pressure on a child to feel the same anger and resentment, that behavior causes confusion and distress in the child. The child may begin to fear the targeted parent and view him or her with suspicion. When those feelings take root in the child and undermine his or her relationship with the targeted parent, the condition is known as parental alienation syndrome (PAS).

Warning signs of HAP and PAS

A HAP/PAS dynamic may emerge where these behaviors are present:

• Blaming the targeted parent for anything possible
• Questioning a child about the details of the targeted parent’s personal life
• Scheduling activities that conflict with the targeted parent’s visitation
• Eavesdropping on phone conversations between the child and the targeted parent
• Refusing the targeted parent access to a child’s medical/school records
• Acting hurt or sad if the child expresses a desire to see the targeted parent
• Creating temptations for the child to avoid visitation with the targeted parent

Nw what do you do than !! 

thanks mr Satnley sir,  

going through all the experts opinion

  I have made up my mind,  if the court grants visitation rights i will not interfere subject to timings suitability.  however.  she has visited the children school several times and spoiled my name and children name.

I have never objected for anything. 

"Saree has fallen on throns and bushes-- should take it out carefully otherwise the throns will tear my skin".

if i am wrong please correct.

@ author .

This is just the begining you have much to see in the future . Yes i do agree with you in such type of matters the female gender spread false news about you to all the neighbour hood .Trying to degrade you . But as time passes by it all heals up by itself .

Now lawyer uncle will further instigate her to file a DV case or a 498 A case against you to harass you and to abstract money from you .when you see her petition you will be shocked with the dirty allegations levied against you and they will try to drag your mother and father (if they are alive )into it as well as your relatives even though they may not stay in the same town as yours :-) .