Subhomoy Das (Retail Manager) 21 August 2011

Wife & child

HI,

THIS IS PROBLEM WHICH I POSTED PREVIOUSLY.

*** WIFE LEFT 11 MONTHS BACK IN PREGNANT CONDITION.

*** WIFE JOINED SCHOOL SERVICE IN PREGNANT CONDITION NEAR HER PARENTS HOUSE. SHE DIDNT INFORM OR DISCUSS WITH ME BEFORE JOINING THE SERVICE. SHE WAS STAYING AT THE SCHOOL HOSTEL AS IT WAS A RESIDENTIAL SCHOOL. SHE VISIT HER PARENTS HOUSE ON WEEKENDS AND HOLIDAYS. MY HOUSE AND HER PARENTS HOUSE IS 400 KMS AWAY AND IN DIFFERENT STATE.

*** WIFE GAVE BIRTH TO A BABY BOY .

*** WIFE JOINED BACK TO THE SCHOOL AFTER HER MATERNITY LEAVE EXPIRED AND NOW IS PRESENTLY STAYING IN THE SCHOOL HOSTEL WITH 3 MONTHS OLD INFANT BABY.

*** PLEASE BE NOTED TO EVERYONE THAT I WAS TOLD IN THIS LAWYERS FORUM THAT I & MY FAMILY MIGHT HAVE ILL TREATED HER WHICH FORCED HER TO TAKE SUCH DECISION. PLS NOTE THAT MY WIFE WAS WORKING IN THE SAME SCHOOL BEFORE HER MARRIAGE WITH ME AND WAS STAYING IN THE SCHOOL HOSTEL. I NOW DOUBT WHETHER SHE RESIGNED FROM SERVICE AFTER MARRIAGE? I HAVE SENT HER ATLEAST 8 LETTERS, INFINITE SMSs AND PHONE CALLS ASKING/REQUESTING/PLEADING HER TO RETURN BACK TO MY HOUSE. BUT SHE IS ADAMANT NOT TO RETURN. SHE IS MORE INTERESTED IN SERVICE THAN TO LEAD A FAMILY LIFE WITH ME. SHE WILL NOT GIVE ME DIVORCE EITHER BY MUTUAL CONSENT OR BY FILING HERSELF. SHE IS TELLING ME THAT SHE WILL STAY THERE WITH THE BABY AND I WILL STAY AT MY PLACE. BUT I HAVE TO DO THE DUTY OF HUSBAND AND FATHER BY SENDING HER MONEY. SHE IS DENYING MY CONJUGAL RIGHTS AND MY FATHERHOOD. THE BABY IS MISSING HER FATHER. IS NOT THAT AN ACT OF CRIME. MY WIFE TOLD ME THAT SHE WILL NOT LEAD FAMILY LIFE WITH ME NOR SHE WILL DIVORCE ME SO THAT I CANT DO ANY 2nd MARRIAGE AND DO AS FAMILY LIFE. SHE IS PLAYING WITH MY LIFE. WHO GAVE HER AUTHORISATION TO PLAY WITH MY LIFE? MY HOUSE AND HER PARENTS HOUSE IS 400 KMS AWAY AND IN DIFFERENT STATE. PERSONS UNDER THESE CUIRCUMSTANCES DO OFTEN GET DEPRESSED AND FRUSTRATED AND THEN COMMITS SUICIDE. DOES THE LAWS EVER WAKE UP TO TAKE ACTION AGAINST THESE LADIES......

I WANT TO ASK THAT IF :

1. I FILE RCR THEN WHAT WILL HAPPEN. WILL MY WIFE BE FORCED TO JOIN ME. SHE IS GIVING ME ONE VAGUE TERMS AND CONDITION THAT SHE WILL JOIN ME IF I LEAVE MY 75 YRS OLD WIDOW SICK MOTHER. WHY SHALL I LEAVE HER? THERE IS NO ONE TO LOOK AFTER HER. MY WIFE KNOWS VERY WELL THAT I`L NOT LEAVE MY MOTHER. THATS WHY SHE GAVE ME JUST AN EXCUSE TO SHOW THE SOCIETY THAT SHE IS READY TO JOIN ME BUT I`M NOT AGREEING ON HER TERMS AND CONDITIONS. SHE IS FORGETTING THAT ITS A FAMILY LIFE WHERE OTHERS LIFE ARE ALSO CONCERNED. I`M NOT VENTURING INTO ANY BUSINESS DEALS WITH MY WIFE THAT I`L SIGN ON AGREEMENT / TERMS AND CONDITIONS WITH MY WIFE TO LEAD A FAMILY LIFE. FAMILY LIFE DEPENDS ON LOVE/FAITH/TRUST.

2. I FILE FOR CHILD VISITATION, THEN CAN I INCLUDE MY MOTHERS NAME AS SHE IS ALSO A GRANDMOTHER WHO WANTS TO SEE HER GRANDSON ATLEAST ONCE BEFORE SHE EXPIRES. BUT MY MOTHERS HEALTH CONDITION WILL NOT ALLOW HER TO TRAVEL 400 KMS TO MEET HER GRANDSON. ON THAT CASEE WILL THE COURT ASK MY WIFE TO BRING THE BABY TO MY PLACE. MY WIFE TOLD ME THAT IF I AND MY MOTHER GETS VISITATION RIGHTS THEN SHE WILL ALLOW US TO SEE THE BABY FROM A CERTAIN DISTANCE FAR AWAY. SHE WILL NEVER ALLOW US TO TOUCH THE BABY OR TKAE THE BAY IN OUR ARMS OR TO PLAY WITH THE BABY OR GIFT THE BABY OR TO FEED ANY CHOCLATE OR SWEETS. IS THAT POINT BY WIFE IS JUSTIFIED? WILL THE COURT ALOOW HER JUSTIFICATION. SHE IS HAVING PRIDE THAT PERHAPS SHE IS THE ONLY LADY IN INDIA WHO HAVE GIVEN BIRTH TO A BOY.

PLEASE HELP ME. I `M WORRIED. I DONT WANT ANY THING . I JUST WANT MY WIFE TO RETRUN TO MY HOUSE AND MY MOTHER CAN SEE HER DAUGHTER-IN-LAW AND GRANDSON ATLEAST ONCE BEFORE SHE EXPIRES.

PLEASE HELP.

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4 Replies

Anandan Rajamanicam (Engineer) 21 August 2011

Hi Das.s,

In this Country the Law always supports women, ( Married women ), they will get multi support, from Birth place property rights, and when they get married they can have rights on husben's family properties, & over and above the Law give too much unwanted power to them.. .. : Men's can't do anything.. just have to suffer ( If you are Hindu ),

I am also same as your experiance and my one is very long strugle then I give up.. I try for RCR, and then Divorce, Nothing coming out.. : my wife is working as a Teacher and she take away my daughter, and My daughter now aged : 15,, but still not aware of what is going on.. who is right and wrong,

I feel one more "Anna Hazare" needs to correct such problems, as a Husbend I do my duty, but she is so much educated lady can't understand what is family life and values..

So I move on without any hopes..

chandra mohan (power) 21 August 2011

ya, Mr Anandam is right. we need another Anna hazare and baba Ramdeo to help the struglling society. The law needs to be seriosly reviewed. Husband dont have any option but to live in hell.

kapil dev (sales manager) 21 August 2011

Yes sir. i am also suffer this problem. even she even do not alow me to see my 10 months old daughter. can we make a community and try solve this type of problem

Anandan Rajamanicam (Engineer) 22 August 2011

Do you think, Respective minister's really looking people's genuine problems,

Example : Kapil Sibal : Telecom Min.. : Can any Ordinary citizen can able to send any issues ?, even though he is responsible for Communication : but you can’t able to get in touch even with his “PA”s or secretary ;

Every people suffering due to cell phone policy : Getting Unwanted calls & SMS, Money looting business saying that Value Added services, Even without asking any value added services Telecom company started deducting the money from pre-paid account, Poor village side people don’t able to understand how to solve this problems, In my home : 5 pre=paid connections we have all get same problems, weekly money from the account looted saying the value added services provided without even customer request for it..

Salman Kurushid : Family issues, mainly like : Divorce cases & Properties dispute due to Hindu Succession Act after 2005 amendment lot of fresh case, just to harass men’s :

Partition suits : how many years takes to get out from the court : min.. 3 to 30 years,

Land Accusation suits : Min. 5 to 40 years, even my one after 30 years I give-up fighting on the court, finally court dismissed the case, but I am not informed. My lawyer died, and 2 owners of Land died also, No representation from Land owners because they also give-up.

So the total system is useless : every one year needs to review and accordingly needs to amend the Laws..

For : Lokpal Drafting : why Kapil Sibal & Chidambarm is involving, why they do not do their work ?