sudarshan murthy (xyz) 30 April 2014

Valuable suggestions needed in a girls life!

I hereby request your valuable suggestion in my cousins life.

My cousin & Bride was married on Feb 2014 in a family tradition at Andhra Pradesh. Coming to groom family he is born with an younger brother and his dependent mother. Before marriage they said they need no dowry you can do anything for your daughter we have no requests and that is our practice to respect women. Groom and Bride used to talk and have healthy conversations before marriage and every one was happy.

The situation changed drastically after marriage, Groom's brother and mother have started mental torture to my cousin since first week and being husband he never supported his wife. They stopped the maid and asked her to do all the chores and took away all the jewellery pretending to tell that its not safe and lets lock it.

Bride being young and very new to environment was not allowed to call parents and restrictions were put and now after a month after marriage Bride and Groom shifted to Groom's Work city and my cousins dad gifted her all the house hold electrical appliances to her daughter as said by the Groom's family so that she doesnt feel tired, But Grooms is abusing telling they should have consulted me before buying.

He takes Bride to Grooms home town every week end and all three start mentally torturing her to the maximum extent. She recently was to be physically tortured by her mother in law for the reason being that she gave her husband refrigerated milk saying " Your trying to kill my son by giving him poison", she thinks refrigirated milk is poison.

Groom has started to threaten my cousin saying that I know how to torture your family, I will give you no pleasure, just since I have married ill let you stay in my house.

But today he says I am not interested in you and cant bare you any more I'll drop you in my mom's house and you stay there I'll stay here.

Sir we request your valuable suggestions, Since she is not able to bare these torture any more and all the jewellery and money - Brides family had gifted her is now under Groom's possession. what can be done in this regard.

Moreover, The Bride's family is at Andhra Pradesh and if an case is filed in court what cases can be filed and where should that be filed because the Bride's Native is andhra pradesh.

Groom's home town is Trichy, Tamil Nadu.

But the Groom and Bride are residence is at coimbatore, Tamil nadu.

requesting an reply at the earliest because the situation is getting worse day by day and whole family is tensed. thanking you in advance for your valuable time to read this mail.

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4 Replies

Solomon Raju (Advocate High Court of A.P.) 30 April 2014

I have gone through your case and understood that the marriage took place very recently....

In General in all marriages, now a days problems are coping up due to egos, education back grounds and status of other spouse family and various other reasons...But first thing people shall understand is that in a new marriage either it be an arranged marriage or love marriage...two people brought up in different environments come under a roof by God's grace and at elder's wishes...for better life...A new family is more like a new born child...a child initially is completely dependent on mother and later once he/she starts crawling...he will crawl this side and that side and fall this side and that side..will have some scratches...this makes him physically strong and he will learn how to balance things.....as same...more involvement of elders makes things awkward...first let bride and groom sit together and let them come to understanding where the problem started and where is the solution....generally it is very tough because of adamant behaviour of other spouse...but the spouse who is willing to join shall sacrifice his/her ego and make his/her efforts towards that direction....

Convincing is a skill and first of all we shall understand that to convince them, we shall first go into their way for some period sacrificing ego and other aspects...thereafter, it is upto you how you mould your partner into your way....Put all your efforts towards that direction...if no response is there, then approach competent family or civil courts to decide the dispute.....If your marriage is under Hindu Marriage Act, 1955 for restitution of conjugal rights you have to file the same under section 9 and if it is christian marriage, you shall file the same under Divorce Act, 1869 section 32...

So make your efforts in that direction....

Solomon Raju

Advocate, High Court of A.P.

Laxmi Kant Joshi (Advocate ) 30 April 2014

i do agree with certain points with Mr. Raju , but if he is doing physical torture and become more violent and her life came into danger if she still resides with him , if you had done all your efforts to reconcile the matter but all in vain and now you want to file case against him then file 498a , DV , and maintenance case against him .

satish bhaskar (Litigant) 30 April 2014

it appears wife's relatives are interfering in the life of the couple. take care for the marriage is new. cases drag for years resulting in harassment to both parties from law and judiciary.

Sreenivas V (S/W) 04 May 2014

Hi Sudharshan,

I see you both belong to different states. So there will be more chances that these things may happen. As said by above members try to keep marriage alive. Going to cases should be lost resort. But once you start putting cases then the things will be worse. One of my collegue in similar situation thought of filing 498A on them. But I told them not to do it but give warning. So with local police and elders they conveyed the message saying if things did not restore they will file case and explained the cases also. Now they both are living hapily and parents interference is not there at all since 1 year. They have a son also now.

Filing cases you can file from where the GIRL home town.