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saloni (house wife)     15 October 2013

Please give me some valuable advice

Hi Members,

 

I had filed a complained at women police station of my city, my husband has left his house and not staying with his parents and also his mother wants to send all my belongings to my home. She called us and told that she will send everything to my house doesnt want me.

She and my in laws are creating more problems between my husband ane me. When police called my husband he has come and saaid that he will come back again and then went abroad it seems.

Now police called his parents and asked them about my husband, they are saying we dont know. He is dead for us. When the police asked them now they are saying that he will come after one month that time we will talk. The officer in charge told me that its better that i file a FIR so that they can issue look out notice and arrest him when he comes. Because as per them without FIR they cannot trace him and come to know when he comes to india.

I dont want to file any case on my husband because i love him, at the sametime i dont want to give divorce to him, as i cant imagine my life without him. He also loves me a lot. But because of family members he is also vexed up with his life. I wanted to have only councelling session. What should i do? The police will not help me if i dont file FIR? pls tell me what can i do in this case?



Learning

 28 Replies


(Guest)

You are mad to think that police counseling can help in matrimonial issues. Now go to the doctor for better treatment.

1 Like

(Guest)

Are you Psycho or what????????

 


I can't understand for what you will file FIR on him???????

 

If i were there then I had asked the Police that on which ground you will file FIR on husband???

 

If husband has deserted his wife and went to abroad on this ground no FIR should be made.

 

Lady come up with full query and plz don't hide the other side....

 

If one is not ready and other one is hell bent to live with him then this clearly shows something is fissy.....

 

If husband has deserted his wife then there is no law to book him on the said cause but yes you will get a ground for divorce and can claim maintenance if you have no source of income and are unable to do job with sufficient reason.

 

Plz try to solve your problem amicably, if husband is not ready to live with you then ask him to give divorce and your articles whatever you brought from your parent's home.

 

If you are not able body or not educated enough to get job or no other source of income then file for maintenance and prove the same in court.

 

And listen........If you are thinking of filling any false cases without any evidence or proof then be ready to face consequences from them.

 

 

1 Like

saloni (house wife)     15 October 2013

which doctor? do u have any reference of some good doctors who can treat my MIL. She has the disease of poking her nose in her sons life and opening her bad mouth for everything even when not required.

2 Like

Sudhir Kumar, Advocate (Advocate)     15 October 2013

You are right to some extent that police counselling can help. They have their own extra-legal methods and language to counsel. But in your case husband is not ready to be counselled. Police is right. They cannot help you without FIR. There is just no other agency which can help you. AND YOU very good enemy of yourself. You are not going to take any action against him although you are being subjected to hide and seek. A game (though futile) (but malicious) is being hatched by him and his parents so that so can befool you and law that they do not know where he is.
3 Like

saloni (house wife)     15 October 2013

Husband deserted me fine. But then why is he not applying for divorce, when they think i dont ahve any proofs and they are clean?

See once a lady posts any query everyone barges on her saying and assuming she is bad. If husband desrted and went abroad then what made MIL call and send the belongings to my house? why can she ask her son to look into the issue?

If there is no ground also u people will say if he doesnt want to stay then you shud leave. Then why the hell did he marry me? he shud have been in live in with some girl?

Do these guys understand what marriage is? And if my husband wants to lieave me fine ...then go to court and proove it why and on what grounds? People can take others for granted.And then cry why laws are favoring women.


(Guest)

Dear Madam,


The love,affection and future thoughts which you have developed now is of no use when other party is hell bent to cheat you........


1. My above reply was only in benefit of you:

 

Reasoning:

 

1. The person who has deserted you has made his mind not to live with you that's why he flew away from you.

 

2. His parent's are also annoyed of you and seeking how to get rid off this is the hardest truth.....so what ever liabilities and duties prevails all has to be beared by husband and not by his parents.

 

3. If you still wait for him and still thinking of his imaginary love then you are fool of nothing......your time,money,energy all will be lost and lastly you will become a old 498a lady,this is the bitter truth.

 

4. Here no Man and women favouring , the reply is only based on the human wellfare.

If you don't believe then you can search the thread where I have given the same reply to Men whose wife had deserted her husband without reason.

So,here only difference is that  A man has no option to take revenge by the help of 498a,DVA 2005 or other IPC sections if his wife deserts him, but in the opposition when a Man deserts a woman she had several options world wide open to take revenge even though they will sustained or not...

 

5. Life is not a 3hrs bolywood movie in which we all see every character and return with a happy ending and satisfy by the climax.


It's real life , Even The billionare of world also suffers in love and in their marital life, so what they simply harass each other and stay pulling his/her legs.

 

No Mam, first feel the value of Human and it's life........your life is not made for wandering around the courts and around such people who are idiots and rascals or you may say selfish enough to ignore the other person even though they are true.

My only concern is to you, plz stop venting anger rather than justify you life which will much good ahead if you really leave that man who had made your life misearable.

 

All older man's rightly opined that " Those who keep vengeance inside their hurt are only burning themselves and not others".

 

So,plz stop getting any thoughts to what to do and how to make them feel and realize that they are wrong.

 

I don't say that you forget about your right's but yes whatever right's mentioned in Marriage act and Indian law book according to that only you will get.

And No law can force your husband to live with you so,it's better to look forward to your life and feel for those person who really loves you.


Thanks and regards.

2 Like

Ranee....... (NA)     15 October 2013

I agree with you Saloni. If your husband does not want to live you then why he ran away like a coward?He should file divorce on the ground on which he does not want to live with you.Where a girl's mother has no right to interfere in daughter's married life(some court says so!), then who gave the right to a son's mother to interfere in her son's married life?

Why can's she logde FIR?Her husband is Missing! Why police would find him out without FIR?

1 Like

saloni (house wife)     15 October 2013

I can understand you want to say..but yes i would like to tell you onething. Be it a girl or a boy, husband or a wife. Never make someone vulnerable. Because, you cant allow people to play with your life. I am working and earning a meaningful living for myself and trying to frame better challenges for myself. Even my feeling towards my husband are dead. What did u get out of this relationship? nothing other than hurt and pain and tears. And i dont want to take revenge by filing cases. Because the biggest punishment is to make people realise and when they realise their mistake its really difficult to live with that guilt all life.

Because our consciousness haunts us everywhere we go... so those who cheat others can never be at peace.

1 Like

D Seikhar G (self)     15 October 2013

@Sufferer your second Reply to this thread is mind blowing I have become your Fan.


 

D Seikhar G (self)     15 October 2013

@Ranee ,saloni herself saying that husband has come to police station but again went to abroad then why she will file false FIR of missing. Do her husband is a child or what , are you abetting her to file a false FIR or what?? Shame on you.

saloni (house wife)     15 October 2013

Ranee madam thanks for the support.

I dint marry my husband for his property or his 1/3 salary. I am capable enough to earn my living with dignity. At the same time he should be mindfull of the reason that he got married to me.

I cant make my life like a shopping mall where people come and go whenever they like. He married me, he has to oblige by this relation, if he doesnt want to then he better file a case, proove his points and take divorce. If he cant handle his own family, then he should have thought about it before marriage and not spoil my life.

With such bad experience in life  with this guy i am really fed up and ....now i am living only for my parents and no one else. I give a damm to what the society thinks of me or calls me aunty or sister or behenji or whatever.


(Guest)

Sudhir jii, Iam pasting below your own reply to this thread kindly elaborate what you want to say on higlighted part of your reply.

 

You are right to some extent that police counselling can help. They have their own extra-legal methods and language to counsel. But in your case husband is not ready to be counselled. Police is right. They cannot help you without FIR. There is just no other agency which can help you. AND YOU very good enemy of yourself. You are not going to take any action against him although you are being subjected to hide and seek. A game (though futile) (but malicious) is being hatched by him and his parents so that so can befool you and law that they do not know where he is.

 

 

Dear sudhir jii,   What are you showing here do Police have extra illegal power and power to speak illegal language to manipulate on any person who has been framed by mere complaint. What you want to show here??????

 

If you have written legal method then can you come from this one line statement to elaborate it as what extra legal power and legal language they have got?????

Please come out with elaboration on their powers on matrimonial issues and Human right issues.

Let all the memebrs of LCI may know the powers of police on a person who is not willing to live with her wife, then what police can do legally as per your version......they have got extra legal method and language to councel.

 

Don't you know U/s 330 IPC it is a crime if they do so, even U/A 226 and U/A 32 they can be booked and their service will go at first instance and secondly-- imprissonment is also waiting for them to such police who utilizes extra legal power and language.


I have read many times your meaningless statements which are good as nothing. Please do write atleast a meaningful sentence which could be appreciated by genuine victims and readers. This is my second attempt to uncorroborate you on your flimsy type of reply.


Thanks & regards.

sandykrish (Interested in Family LAW)     16 October 2013

Sudhir is already blacklisted from taking opinions. Thanks Sufferer For updating the list

Ranee....... (NA)     16 October 2013

Originally posted by : D Seikhar G

@Ranee ,saloni herself saying that husband has come to police station but again went to abroad then why she will file false FIR of missing. Do her husband is a child or what , are you abetting her to file a false FIR or what?? Shame on you.

Suppose, the husband came once to PS then he went somewhere.Nobody knows his whereabout ! Even his parents also replied "He is dead for us".

If parents were NOT LYING the what should be the legal procedure to trace the husband out by the wife?

Now tell me M I abetting her to file false FIR or You are a biased person?In reverse case what would be your advice to the aggrieved husband?

What is wrong in Sudhir Sir's advice?He has given legal solution with a neutral eye.

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