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Discussion > Family Law > Divorce > How to get divorce from my wife without maintenance   Unanswered Threads Post New Topic

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Member (Account Deleted)


software consultant
[ Scorecard : 54]
Posted On 05 May 2010 at 18:30 Report Abuse

I'm a 30 yrs old and married in Mysore on 24-Feb-2010 and currently residing in bangalore. We both are software engineers working in
different reputed MNCs.
This was a Hindu arranged marriage
with the consent of the bride and groom.
Due to my tight work schedule I couldnt spend much time knowing my wife before our marriage.
However, It was quickly evident from her behaviour and talks that we both lack heavily in compatibility.
Right after the marriage the same day in a fit of anger she asked me to file a divorce. Thats just an example of
how angry as a person she is.
I've been experiencing mental torture everyday spending my time after work arguing and fighting with her.
She had a laid few conditions before marriage i.e
 a) her widow mother to be allowed to stay with us after wedding.
  -- I rented a separate house(leavin my parents) as my current house would have been small to accomodate
 b) she should be allowed to choose any profession
  -- agreed
 c) no dowry
  -- not a single rupee as dowry. in fact asked to have a simple ritual at a temple

I agreed to all the above as she seemed to meet both mine and my families expectations in terms of behaviour and talks. 
Now, after marriage
 -- she is insisting me to let her give money to her elder sister(married)
 -- trying to distance me from my parents by not letting me meet my parents
 -- dont provide proper cooked food neither her mom or she
 -- lot of arguments and unnecessary quarrels

-- she is very very short tempered
 -- never lets me focus at my work, she calls me atleast 20-30 times a day inspite of requesting her not to do
 
My reaction to above
 -- i've become assertive and staying with my parents in the same city in a different home
 -- identified the root of the problem and asked her mother to leave to her native. They have some property in their native and a home.
 -- asked her to manage all household monthly expenses using her salary and the rest of the family financial plannin shall be taken bourne by me.
 
My above reactions to the problem has only added more fights and arguments in my life.
but am hell bent, and i dont want to stay away from my parents anymore.
I want to take care of them even if it costs my marriage.
My parents have been very good and kind to her which she and her mom too acknowledge.

I've reached to a decision and i dont want to continue with this marriage and suffer everyday.
My wife is not willing to divorce me or for any mutual consent.

Please help me and advice how to get out of this marriage asap.
I'm going mad each day. My life was lot more peaceful before marriage.
my parents too are very sad about my fate.I'm a 30 yrs old and married in Mysore on 24-Feb-2010 and currently residing in bangalore. We both are software engineers working in different reputed MNCs. This was a Hindu arranged marriage with the consent of the bride and groom. Due to my tight work schedule I couldnt spend much time knowing my wife before our marriage. However, It was quickly evident from her behaviour and talks that we both lack heavily in compatibility. Right after the marriage the same day in a fit of anger she asked me to file a divorce. Thats just an example of how angry as a person she is. I've been experiencing mental torture everyday spending my time after work arguing and fighting with her. She had a laid few conditions before marriage i.e a) her widow mother to be allowed to stay with us after wedding. -- I rented a separate house(leavin my parents) as my current house would have been small to accomodate b) she should be allowed to choose any profession -- agreed c) no dowry -- not a single rupee as dowry. in fact asked to have a simple ritual at a temple I agreed to all the above as she seemed to meet both mine and my families expectations in terms of behaviour and talks. Now, after marriage -- she is insisting me to let her give money to her elder sister(married) -- trying to distance me from my parents by not letting me meet my parents -- dont provide proper cooked food neither her mom or she -- lot of arguments and unnecessary quarrels -- never lets me focus at my work, she calls me atleast 20-30 times a day inspite of requesting her not to do My reaction to above -- i've become assertive and staying with my parents in the same city in a different home -- identified the root of the problem and asked her mother to leave to her native. They have some property in their native and a home. -- asked her to manage all household monthly expenses using her salary and the rest of the family financial plannin shall be taken bourne by me. My above reactions to the problem has only added more fights and arguments in my life. but am hell bent, and i dont want to stay away from my parents anymore. I want to take care of them even if it costs my marriage. My parents have been very good and kind to her which she and her mom too acknowledge. I've reached to a decision and i dont want to continue with this marriage and suffer everyday. My wife is not willing to divorce me or for any mutual consent. Please help me and advice how to get out of this marriage asap. I'm going mad each day. My life was lot more peaceful before marriage. my parents too are very sad about my fate.



Online certification courses IP, IT and Investment Law


cool


NA
[ Scorecard : 341]
Posted On 05 May 2010 at 21:08 Report Abuse

Hire a good advocate. Check the allegations made by your wife and counter blasts with cases.



Kiran


Consultant
[ Scorecard : 162]
Posted On 05 May 2010 at 22:24 Report Abuse

You have to atleast wait for one year after marriage in order to file a divorce case in the court. In your case you do not have any material grounds for divorce which you can prove in the court. These kind of things will be considered as 'Petty quarrels'/ 'Ordinary wear and tear of family life' by the court and u will be ultimately denied divorce.

Try to talk to your wife and see if she can change her attitude and lead a proper life. If she is not willing to change try to convince her for mutual consent of divorce. If that too didn't work then my suggestion is not to file divorce until there is a continuous period of dessertion ( seperation ) for 2 years. Then you will atleast have 'Dessertion Clause' to fight for divorce.

Meanwhile she can file False Domestic Voilence/ 498-A cases against you and your family memebers. So take precautionary measures before hand..

All the best..



Total thanks : 1 times


G. ARAVINTHAN


Solicitor / Legal Consultant
[ Scorecard : 21960]
Posted On 05 May 2010 at 22:55 Report Abuse

Can prove that your wife is well off with her income.. then no need to give maintenance



Total thanks : 2 times


unique horn


self
[ Scorecard : 532]
Posted On 05 May 2010 at 22:55 Report Abuse

No provision in law to get divorce within 1 year of marriage, also it request 6 month period of living separate before considering divorce. You have lot of  time to think about divorce, so please sit and talk the misunderstandings and try to get it right. Hope you will...



D. Arun Kumar


Medical Value Travel
[ Scorecard : 3775]
Posted On 06 May 2010 at 02:15 Report Abuse

1. Folks with odd hours of working and/or having different temparaments are bound to fall trap unknowingly to your type of most common problems currently in urban society. Infact harshley said then you are in most vulnerable situation due to DINKY lifestyle and if you raise your tentacles and read local media reports then probably you may like to follow para 2 suggestion to give it a try for next 6 months to see if it still may work honestly between you two.
2. Attend jointly counceling sessons of a professional Marriage Counselor by balancing your job and family equally/responsibly.
All the best.
Rgds.

 



Total thanks : 1 times


Member (Account Deleted)


software consultant
[ Scorecard : 54]
Posted On 06 May 2010 at 08:02 Report Abuse

Thank you all for your inputs. Will contemplate on the same.



Total thanks : 1 times


N.K.Assumi


Advocate
[ Scorecard : 22143]
Posted On 11 May 2010 at 12:41 Report Abuse

Good to contemplate as you can not have cacke in your hands and eat it too, that is divorce without maintenance.



Total thanks : 1 times


avnish kaur


consultant
[ Scorecard : 958]
Posted On 16 May 2010 at 01:42 Report Abuse

both of U NEED COUNSELLING not divorce



Total thanks : 1 times


Nandha


NIL
[ Scorecard : 773]
Posted On 19 March 2011 at 01:15 Report Abuse

I also face the same problem with my wife. We got married in sept'2009 and have a child now.

For the last six months I am living with my parents here. My lawyer also advised 'desertion'? Wait for 2 years and you will find a way.




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