Want divorce from narcissist husband, married for 6 months
Swapy
(Querist) 01 November 2018
This query is : Resolved
I was married to this guy 6 months before. He has been harrasment me mentally and emotionally since our engagement. He started with many name calling, belittling me. I informed my parents about this, but we just shrugged off as we are already engaged.i told him that it's hurting me , then he told that he is been joking about that. And he also shown interest in knowing about my sister after engagement, when I finally questioned about it and told him that it's hurting because I'm going to be his partner. he agreed attracted towards her and later he just told me that I'm imagining all the things and he never did such a shameful thing. Even he took my virginity by force and with anger and when I cried and questioned him that what wrong I did to hurt me and not loving me, then he simply told sorry and he told that he don't know anything about girls virginity as he has no siblings ( women), somehow he convinced me that he loves me. And I believed him.but this doesn't stop. He is continuing to harass me emotionally, he is not allowing me to communicate properly , he never listens what I say, and he always blames me. So I got a doubt that may be he liked someone before me and I asked that, he went into rage and said you always talks rubbish.. he always tries to hurt me some how..and after seeing hurt in my face he satisfies and says because you did like that I have to act in such a manner. He many times warned me that he will hit me. And if he gets angry he hit my bottom so even I complain anyone they never feel it like hitting me. He easily goes into rage and always makes me cry, I tried everything.. I never misspoke against his words, I never disobeyed his orders, but still says you did such thing that's why I'm angry, he uses me for sex but never connects emotinally, he always tries to control me by fear, he once almost hit me by his fist, but by god's grace I was saved, from then onwards i couldn't continue to be with him. It's really exhausting, I want divorce from this man. I don't have any kind of evidence, he just cleverly manipulate s every one that these querels are common among couple and nothing to worry, no one believes me. I can't continue with him.. please help me, please save me from him. What to do? How to divorce him? I just have my dairy that was written to outlet my feelings which I can't communicate with him.. I tried everything to save this marriage, but now really want to leave , please help me
Swapy
(Querist) 01 November 2018
Plus:He always asks sex after hurting me, he make up with me using sex, he tries to control my emotions. After he tried hitting me, I changed my behaviour towards him, like ignoring him.. next day he simply asked why are you ignoring me. I told because of your behaviour yesterday, then he went into rage asusal , he told me that how can I accept you if you are changing day by day?? He always calls me fat aunty.. and always says I don't know anything, I'm not fit for anything he says.. I'm getting headache dealing with him. Please help.. I finally building my gut to leave him..
rajeev sharma
(Expert) 01 November 2018
It is good that you have a diary where you have recorded the events in chronological order . It is a good piece of evidence in itself. One more thing have you ever spoken to your parents in this regard? If possible tell them all this. If you really wants to take divorce whenever he hits you call police and file FIR for domestic violence against your husband or any other person who is present in the house and encourages your husband to use violence. Talk to your parents or if you are financially independent take your decision to leave matrimonial house as one year separation is required to file a suit for divorce.
SHIRISH PAWAR, 7738990900
(Expert) 01 November 2018
First you try to amicably settle your issues by involving your parents and his parents. If nothing comes out then you can file divorce case under cruelty in court. You can also file domestic violence case etc. Consult local advocate.
Guest
(Expert) 01 November 2018
See, the son of God, the great Lord Jesus Christ has come down straight from heaven to deliver discourse to you. Could you get any solace with the great sermons of the son of God? Please check, if you can take advantage of his sermons to ensure make hell of the marital life of both of you forever.
Dr J C Vashista
(Expert) 02 November 2018
Settle the issues amicably, if required may rope in relatives and friends before considering legal remedy.
A. A. JOSE
(Expert) 02 November 2018
Most of the issues stated by you appear to be commonly seen on account of lack of adjustment knacks and proper understanding amongst newly married couples. Persons joining in matrimony comes from different family and social backgrounds each one of who carries with them his/her own past baggages alongwith hopes and expectations for an ideal wife/husband as per his/her long nursed dreams. It is virtually impossible in this world to find a perfect person as husband/wife as per one's dreams. It is, therefore, that lot of maturity is essential on the part of the newly married couples to whole-heartedly accept one's partner as he or she is, with his/her weaknesses and imperfections, so as to build long lasting relationship based on mutual love, care, respect, understanding & adjustments for building a 'family' on strong foundations. Problems generally found arising when each partner start dictating the other one to behave in a certain set pattern as per his/her own past baggage which may be stiffly resisted by the other partner and thus a conflict starts between the partners. Perhaps, if one of the partners is more wise and matured, he/she would make necessary adjustments in his/her behaviour and ensured that frictions amongst them are avoided at any cost. Each partner should have willingness to save his/her marriage life by not giving chance to the other partner a cause for raising issues and only with mutual love, affection, respect, patience aunderstanding and a 'give & take attitude' a long standing marital relationship can ensured.
Kindly make a sincere self-examination of yourself and see if there is any way left for saving your married life. If not, first try to involve your parents and elders before going for final separation please.
Kumar Doab
(Expert) 02 November 2018
You may take help of elders of your family, competent and experienced well wishers, seasoned PIP’s, help groups, community leaders, NGO’s, experienced colleagues, associations, etc and try to resolve the matter and mend the conduct of both spouses and save the marriage or end the wedlock amicably by MCD on reasonable/mutually acceptable terms..
If either of the spouses is unwilling to budge then find a very able LOCAL counsel specializing in concerned filed of law e.g; Family/Civil matters as in your case, and well versed with LOCAL applicable rules, precedence, latest judgments etc …. and worth his/her salt, can advise you and even help you.
Online discussions are not substitute to in person discussions with a very able counsel of unshakable repute and integrity specializing in concerned field of law.
There are such very able counsels at each location.
Check for such counsels at LOCAL e.g; Family/ Civil courts, HC, SC …
Cruelty by either spouse is valid ground for divorce and court may grant divorce on established facts..and may also opine that marriage is irretrievably broken down..
