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krishna (na)     25 June 2012

Solution for my married life

Hello Everyone,


My wife does not want to stay with my family. It is very important for me to keep my family with me since my parents are senior citizens and I have a dependent brother. My working place and my native are different cities.

I and my wife both are working. Both of us wants to live with each other. I beleive that divorce should be the LAST option in life.

We have stayed separted for 3 years but her behavior was unchanged. We reunited for few months and now again we are living separated.

I feel a independent counselling can help in my case.

I dont have much proofs towards the mental cruelty done by her. Hence I am unable to make ground on cruelty. I am anticipating that if I file divorce she will say that I want to stay.

I have invited her to come for a marriage counsellor but she is not responding. She is totally in the grip of her cruel parents.

What is the best option for me to bring my married life on the track . I want no interference my parents- in -law into my life.

I am okay to go for MCD if my wife agrees since our marriage is already broken imotionally and mentally.

Thank You.



Learning

 5 Replies

Tajobsindia (Senior Partner )     25 June 2012

@ Author,


If divorce is last thing in your mind then try following remedies;

1. Make efforts internally to relocate to her working city for some months and see if that helps in harmony as your parents home is different and so does her natal home as you say.


2. Both of you have not really known each other and small interference of any third person makes issues between you two big is what spells from your brief. Hence be patient and understandable to various situations in life coming your way including these and related once. A husband is protector and provider in legal sense
J


3. Seems there are issues into your conjugality (s*x) too. Try spending quality time during extended weekends (if both spouse working cities are not that far apart) and or spend quality time with her during longer holidays. Take lead from Services (Military) people life I mean do you hear their marriages breaking inspite of living for almost 3 years in wilderness away from their wives and families!


Try above solutions which came to my mind right away and give say some time line say 1-2 more years by really making an effort to work them through and if nothing works then we will see what can be then suggested !

 

Adv Archana Deshmukh (Practicing Advocate)     25 June 2012

Talk to her to finalize the issue as to what she want and how long does she want to continue with the situation which is not good for your married life at all and would eventually break it.

You are right, independant councelling can help you, so talk to your wife again.  Take the help of other relatives / friends who can understand your problem and talk to her and help you to convince her for councelling.

Adv.R.P.Chugh (Advocate/Legal Consultant (rpchughadvocatesupremecourt@hotmail.com))     25 June 2012

Counselling is your thing. There is still a lot of relationship left in this marriage. So don't plunge in for a divorce. File an RCR seeking your wife's company, or without any case go to the mediation centre seeking their counselling and intervention in the case. 

 

God Bless you !

krishna (na)     26 June 2012

Hello Everyone,

1. There is no relative or friend who want to intervene. In the past everybody has tried their best but she is following her parents. Whatever they say, she just do it.

2. Me and my wife are working in the same town. I am not calling her 'coz she might take other meaning of my call. (For sure her parents) . Each and every small thing my parents-in-law are escalating.

3. Her parents wants me to talk to them which I really dont want. They both are not trust worthy persons and lie a lot.

4. My wife is not understanding that she is been used by her parents. They are eating her income and are not taking any tensions towards their daughter's married life.

5. I know if i file divorce, I may fall in various legal probelms.

6. @ Mr Bharat: Which mediation centre you are talking about?

7. How should I proceed for establising a communication between us.

Thank You.

krishna (na)     26 June 2012

Hello Everyone,

1. There is no relative or friend who want to intervene. In the past everybody has tried their best but she is following her parents. Whatever they say, she just do it.

2. Me and my wife are working in the same town. I am not calling her 'coz she might take other meaning of my call. (For sure her parents) . Each and every small thing my parents-in-law are escalating.

3. Her parents wants me to talk to them which I really dont want. They both are not trust worthy persons and lie a lot.

4. My wife is not understanding that she is been used by her parents. They are eating her income and are not taking any tensions towards their daughter's married life.

5. I know if i file divorce, I may fall in various legal probelms.

6. @ Mr Bharat: Which mediation centre you are talking about?

7. How should I proceed for establising a communication between us.

Thank You.


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