Hi Law Experts,

 

I'm a 27 yrs old and got married on January 2010, its was a Love marriage. we both Were falling in love then we decided to get married But I was thinking It's not good time to get married, that's why I always discussed with her, it's not good time to get marrige because that time wasnt good for me, I also told to her about my younger sister! I told her I have younger sister I cant get marrage at this time it's effect may can be her marriage but we can do after my younger sister merrage, She said just put the registration in court for our faith and we will start our married life after 1 and half year.This marriage was know only to the girls family and we got married in Nagpur court infront of her relative didnt have anyone there from my side, Now I feels shy to be publicly exposed due to only my younger sister merrage because Her marriage didn't fixed yet anywhere.

I am residing in Nagpur & she is not living with me from begining, i was in her emotion only & unfortunatly my parents are still unaware from this case, we are discussing on phone, I have realised from last 6 month I was wrong because she is keeping the pressure on me for to take her at my home  and we are always fighting on phone on this thing also lots of small sily things because now we dont have understanding between us Now I am very regretful on my past decision, I'm going mad each day. My life was lot more peaceful before marriage. some time she saying now she did not believe me also she can't wait for me she is keeping the pressure on me for to take her at my home otherwise she will get 2nd merrage Sometimes she gives me the threats that she will commit suicide that's why I'm too afraid Now I am unable to understand what should I do can anyone please suggest me how to handled this situation

 

RAM

Try to see the situation from her point of view...she is a girl who has been married since 2 1/2 years and yet is unable to lead a normal matrimonial life. Even her own matrimonial family does'nt know her.  She has waited for one more year than what was decided the waiting period ofr 1 1/2 year.  Isnt it natural that she wants to go to her matrimonial house now? Her family knows the marriage, so isnt they may be constantly pressurising her that she should live with her husband now. Its natural for them to be worried about the life and future of their daughter. For how long will she keep residing at her parents house? It is better you face the facts and talk to your family and take her at home and give her a dignity and place which she deserves in your life.

Madam Thanks four quick reply,

I am trying to understand the situation, I can talk with my parents and get her at my home but she saying she is not agree to live with my parents, I'm a Son of  my parents alone that is the issue with me, she alway talikning opposite language, sometime, I have already discussed with her about time I just need some time min. 5 to 6 month for prepared becaused I have just swaped my Job in last month, i need some time to settle in Job,  I cant handled all thing fastly, roght now I have some finace issue if My parent wont agree then what should I do, I will need some finace to manage my matrimony life outside but she saying that is not her issue, it's your Problem, sometime She is saying about divorce but she is not agree to come in court for submit MCD case in court, she always saying u can submit,

How I will handled madam :(

She seems to be too much frustrated by the situation by now and probably have started losing faith in you. Be calm and talk to her clearly, without giving the impression that you are just giving reasons to avoid  taking her home. It is better if you do not hide the fact from your family any more. Take them in confidence and tell them everything. Problem can be solved through mutual discussions. Though initially your parents may get angry but they will also understand the plight of their daughter in law, as they are also parents of a daughter.

marriage is not childs play... you realise sooner...

even to get divorce it involves money now...

discuss and settle for something rather than drag pointless...

Who cares whether you are married or not to fix up marriage with your younger sister? I don't think that is any big reason to worry about. It is possible that as you are delaying taking her home she is feeling insecured that in order to pay the dowry amounts of your sister you will succumb to parent's pressure to marry a girl who brings good sum of dowry. Or that you are now changed because you don't find any profit in having relationship with her. My advise is convey to your parents that you both married on your own, nobody from her side were present. If you admit the people from her side were present your parents will get angry saying, "what kind of people they are that they have married their daughter to our son without even informing us". They will never accept her if you admit her family members knew about your marriage. They will allege "they all conspired to get you cheaply without dowry". These things generally happen in the minds of parents of people involved in love marriages.

Not taking parents into confidence or not getting them by side multiply the woes of the disturbed / troubled marriages. Her parents have married her off to you in their presence and they are by the side of her. But neither your parents know about it nor you have made efforts to  take them into confidence. If she is into trouble .... you are equally troubled - if not more!!! Don't delay further. Tell your parents immediately. Whatever may  be their reactions but let  them know it first. Then you decide what and how you will do the rest!!! 

Thanks Mr. Sunil Sharma,

You are correct I'm equally troubled,  my parents know about I want to marry with her and they are agreed, but they dont know I already got married with her, I'm  scared because she saying she is not agree to live with my parents, she always saying to me take new home on rent we will live alone but I'm a Son of  my parents alone that is the issue with me, she always talkning opposite language.  sometime  the question always comes in my mind, why her parents did not discussed or informed my parents that time, I have realised I was wrong Now I am very regretful on my past decision, I'm going mad each day.

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