I live in Westchester County in New York. There is ridiculously open gender bias in family courts leading to bullying of men when it comes child custody and financial burden. Why men have to loose all their hard earned money because of a bad marriage? I am desperately seeking Mastermind insider advice on how to relive my financial pain which is affecting me and my child. I don't want to pay spousal maintenance and child support OR pay as less as possible. She is stashing away all the money in her bank account and basically using child as a cash cow. I am finally divorced with joint custody of my son, and I am the one who makes sure child is well taken care off in terms of his health, schooling, extra curricular activities and over all well being. She is an absentee mother with no affection towards the child. My ex who had a free lawyer from some women organization tried her very best to cause me litigation fatigue, making me spend $90,000 in legal fees and tons of trauma and I had to continuously defend against her false allegations. Now I am at a point wherein I don't want to pay her any spousal maintenance and child support or pay as less as possible.
First question which court allowed the spousal and child support, secondly if the wife not caring or providing for child support seek complete physical custody of child if you are being exclusively burdened for it.
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Weschester County Supreme Court located in White Plains, New York, USA. It is impossible to get full physical custody for fathers unless mother does some extremely horrendous to the child. It is very difficult to prove she is a neglectful mother. I have video recordings where child is crying and going into tantrum when mother comes to pick him up from me, but court says "all children cry during exchanges". My son is only 4 years old and court is not going to weigh in his statement.
I am already divorced with joint custody. But court adjudged for me to pay child support to the mother until the child is emancipated or turns 21 and mother can spend the money at her sole discretion with no accountability.
are you paying any spousal maintenance also or you are paying only for the child
you can consider filing a petition for reduction in monthly amount based on change of circumstances OR if you have documents which prove that your ex lied / exaggerated the expenses before the court which led to award of higher amount by the court - because you have stated that she is stashing all the money in bank account. You are having joint custody of child. You can also consider possibility of modification in order to the effect that you yourself will pay directly for the school fee, extra curricular activities, medical attention etc. to the concerned offices/authorities