Want seperation...
Querist :
Anonymous
(Querist) 15 April 2011
This query is : Resolved
Hi,
I got married in Feb 2009. Though it was a love marriage and I knew my husband 5 yrs before our marriage. We use to work in the same organization. I tried helped him financially thinking he wants to do something on his own. I even went to the extent of purchasing a car and giving him to keep it with himself to make it easy for him to commute. He told me they have a business which is run by his dad and have invested in some other projects which works as additional income source. He even covered the demand of dowry saying they are rituals. My father died when I was very young but still my mother fulfilled all their demands like AC, Fridge, TV Bed Almirah Dressing table, cash... even she asked for 50 Pair of clothes for relatives, Gold for her 3 daughters (DIL) my father in law (FIL) and herself. She even asked to give 18 blankets as a welcome of Barat. Once married my mother in law (MIL) forced me give money to everyone present as a token of respect and it was one of their rituals. My MIL didn't even had proper clothes or footwear for me saying I should use what was given by my mom n not to expect anything from her. with time started complaining about the gifts given to them by my mum saying we should have given rings/chains to her son in laws , should have gifted my DIL chains rather than ear rings, her gold set was very light, my FIL's ring was not heavy. My mother should have given microwave n laptop as it would have been for my n my husband’s convenience etc. Once my youngest SIL said they wanted to ask my mom to present one of her factories as a gift in marriage but thought my mom was intelligent enough to do so anyways but they were proved wrong. I got to know the house they are living in is rented and his dad is not working at all for past 15 years. And the only source of income they had was my husband salary. but still I thought we both r working with MNC & r earning good so we can certainly with time earn enough to get a house. But my MIL was always asking my husband for money we gave a hefty sum for house expenses but still for a small thing like sofa cover or a water filter she would ask for additional money. And to above everything my husband had only 1 answer she didn't mean it she is not well. Always fighting with me for money saying I stop her son from giving her money who am I to keep a track of what’s spend how it is spend and where???? I am trying to take her son away n she will make sure I won’t be around for long... she even claimed that as her husband couldn’t she will make her son fulfil all her dreams. Mentally torturing me about small things that in day to day life don’t matter much and can easily be ignored but can really make you feel you are living in hell. every time when she wanted my mom to give something she will make me call my mum but when it was time for her to give something on any festival or as a ritual she will forget...saying she is not well I am even pretty sure she is faking her illness. she started teaching crap to my husband about me n my family to an extent that he started hitting me occasionally, Once his sister even witnessed it.
We didn't go for honeymoon or celebrated any of the festivals or our anniversary as my SIL would need my husband or it might serve as a bad impression for my youngest SIL.
Anyways then I had a baby boy in may 2010 and she wanted me to give the baby to her elder daughter who doesn’t have a baby for 15 yrs and I should work giving them an easy lifestyle when I refused she started fighting with me within 24 hours of my son’s birth and abusing me all the doctors and nurses were listening. They even commented that such surroundings are not good for my health as I just had a baby we should do something and make her leave the hospital. She even tried insulting me in front of my friends who came to meet me and my baby and she also insulted my younger sister along with other family members. after 2 torturous days they took me to my matrimonial house as I was very sure she won’t take care of me or my baby. I begged for them to let me go to my mother's house for the first 40 days but she refused saying some of her relatives will be coming to meet and give monetary presents to the baby. Once home she refused to do anything for me or my baby, And would always send my husband to call me sit with every1 rather than resting. I refused as my baby was only 6 days n I was anyways weak all with taking care of him without any help my husband started beating me to such extend that my face was swollen. With other small tortures which I didn't disclose to my family thinking they will take tension and anyways it is a pain for which I was responsible for my decision to marry my husband. All I did was requested my mum to take me to her place as my MIL is not well. When she came to get me they asked her to send clothes and gold for every1 including her daughters as it is a ritual. when I was at my mother's place after the completion of 40 days nobody came to take me home and no mention either initially for a couple of months my husband did visit us but his visit stopped when I asked him to give me some money as I don’t like to depend on my mother for everything though she won’t refuse. I even asked him to give me my ATM card which he had with him but he never said a yes or a no on that either when he did returned my ATM card it was with a balance of 97 rupees. but with time he stopped calling me or taking my calls when I called his home number my MIL asked me to stop bothering his son to ask my mum to buy them a house along with some cash or forget I have a husband or she will ever take me back in.
within these 11 months 3 of my cousins got married so I wanted to get some clothes and jewellery after asking them repeatedly as they have everything in their locker they refused i along with a few of my family members went to their place asking to take me some clothes and get some of my jewellery from their locker she locked my almirah and called the police saying we are harassing them she even went to the extent of tearing her clothes and scratching herself for effects, anyways the police did help us to get a couple of saris and jewellery that was given by my mum to me. From that day onwards my husband is not picking any of my calls not even when my son was hospitalized. I wanted to save my marriage but now I am tired of everything and want to get rid of this ASAP.
My question is:
1) What’s the best way of finishing this off at the earliest and getting a proper maintenance for my baby I would prefer not to get into monthly maintenance as they are not reliable enough. Also my husband doesn’t deserve any visiting rights as he didn't bother to think about the baby once or meet him for that matter.
Some1 is suggesting women cell others are suggesting mutual divorce as consenting would take a very long time.
but I don’t think they would be ready to give me anything in terms of stridhan, alimony or maintenance for the baby.
2) Can I get some sort of maintenance from my husband as my baby is very young and I am not earning anything and would really like not to put any burden on my mum though she doesn't mind and can take care of us.
3) Would this affect my divorce plea?
4) Most of my things are still at their place specially my documents, bank papers etc. how can I get them?
Your earliest opinion would be appreciated...
Jitendar Kumar gupta
(Expert) 16 April 2011
really who have suffered very much. so you must taught them a lesson by filing criminal case as well as DV Case and divorce with the maintenance petition. we are with you. Do'nt worry.
J.K.Gupta Adv.
New Delhi
9868529732
Arun Kumar Bhagat
(Expert) 16 April 2011
Register an FIR u/s 498a/406 IPC. File a case u/s 12 of PWDVAct gainst all your in laws and beloved husband.
Querist :
Anonymous
(Querist) 17 April 2011
Thank you so much for you help...I was advised to go to Women Cell to claim my Str dhan and get a divorce...
also I have heard that Divorce cases are very time consuming ....
is there any other way to get this over with quickly....
And can I get Interm maintenance from him for me and my baby if so how much? he earns 37k per month...
can his parents dependency on him influence our case...
