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Niraj (Manager)     16 February 2012

Deserted by wife who now lives with her parents and infant.

Hi Experts, Please Advise.

My wife has deserted me since 9 months and lives with her parents along with 1 yr old child. We both are working professionals at managerial levels staying in Mumbai. We are married for last 2 years.

Since then I have regularly visited child and wife in her parents house. Wife and parents are not ready to resolve small issues and financial irregularities on their part. They do not speak to me nor ready to resolve it through any intermediary like my friends and relatives.

Recently they made me vacate the house we lived after marriage which is jointly owned by my wife and her mother. Hence in return I have taken away all jewelleries given by me during and after marriage.

I want my Wife and child to return and stay with me on my rented accomodation in Mumbai. I want least interference from her parents in our daily home affairs.

Kindly advise what action should I take to get them back.



Learning

 11 Replies

Tajobsindia (Senior Partner )     16 February 2012

@ Author


1. Send (after Xerox the contents) a A4 size open stepeled folded letter with Postal stamp via RPAD Notice to your wife askign her to come back to such and such address as it being her matrimonial home alogn with your child.


2. Keep quite if she does not come. Continue meeting your child and wife till it lasts.


3. The moment you poke Law since your MIL interference / influence is much in your case she (your wife) under more influence will use Gender Laws. Carry on patience / tactfully intervention by neutral people.


 

2 Like

**Vikram** (Managing Partner)     16 February 2012

I feel very bad..You post is so full of emotions and at the same time I feel there is a conflict..between yourself being in your own terms and the wanting to stay with your wife and child...

 

First of all... you should not have stayed in the house provided by your inlaws....this gives them an upperhand and dictate terms...and they are only there to dictate terms...this is what they are there to do...

 

Stay on the footpath if required, but do not take anything from your in-laws....They will make you a chakka..mentally you will be a chakka..because inside you ...you will know that you are not your own self...and you will not be able to accept it...

 

Your wife should remember that she is no longer a Kid, she is a mother and your are the father of the child..I am sure she knows it and will be able to make her qon decisions..

 

she should be mature enough to understand that without the father, the child will face a lot of problems...

 

The parents of the wife are probably terrorists or I shall call the greatest fools in the world..they always spoil the girls future...who are they to decide what she wants to do...

 

You are a man...be on your terms, ask you wife to come and start staying with you in the rented accomodation...and if she does not come, stay on your won...be on your own terms...

 

Vikram


(Guest)
Originally posted by :Tajobsindia
"
@ Author


1. Send (after Xerox the contents) a A4 size open stepeled folded letter with Postal stamp via RPAD Notice to your wife askign her to come back to such and such address as it being her matrimonial home alogn with your child.
 
"

 

Can you Eloborate ? in the eyes of Law ?
Postal Stamp RPAD  Notice ?
Curious to know :-)

Niraj (Manager)     16 February 2012

Thanks..your advise is very helpful.

 

Please clarify what you meant by my wife "will use Gender Laws".

 

Since they forced my out of house without me having alternate accomodation, it is very difficult to go at her parents home to meet my wife and child.

 

I read on website about filing petition for Restoration of Conjugal Rights. Can and Should I exercise this option?

Chaitanya_Lawyer_Mumbai (Lawyer)     16 February 2012

RPAD is Registered Post with Acknowledgement Due.

It is equivalent to RCR Notice.

1 Like

Chaitanya_Lawyer_Mumbai (Lawyer)     16 February 2012

All jewellery given by you to her during & after marriage is called streedhan & she can claim it.

Apart from that she can file 498a / DV.

Read '498a Survival Guide' available on net.

Join SIFF.

1 Like

Niraj (Manager)     16 February 2012

@ Chaitanya

 

I intend to deposit all jewellery in a locker of my name with nominee of my wife and child. I am afraid if they are in the hands of her parents and brother.

Chaitanya_Lawyer_Mumbai (Lawyer)     16 February 2012

It does not work like that...she can ask possession of her property or file IPC 406 against you.

Niraj (Manager)     16 February 2012

@ Chaitanya..

 

Thanks for guiding me on this aspect I was unaware off. Do you have any suggestion on what steps should I take to get my wife and child stay with me?

Chaitanya_Lawyer_Mumbai (Lawyer)     16 February 2012

Nobody can force a person to stay with another person against his/her wishes.

You can file for RCR in Family court.

1 Like

Ravindra Malve (Data Recovery Expert)     18 February 2012

Going by LAW is the biggest mistake you will do in your life.After trying very hard by consuming your personal efforts If nothing works at all then keep option open to go by LAW .

There are always small things ,which without proper attention and resolution ,gets converted to LETHAL PROBLEMS for family life.The best option is to take initiative by HUSBAND and WIFE to discuss and resolve it accordingly.Not only law can resolve problems.

Dear, I am of this opinion that first of all try to accept your faults very honestly.Acceptance makes person transparent.Do not overstress yourself as well.

Keep your head always cool while talking on phone and behaving with her .It may present you wrongly.Its a bit hard,coz you must be going through tremendous pain, as you are unable to meet your child.Its really very painful.I understands coz I experienced it myself.But we have to accept whatever comes in our path while living life.BE STRONG FOR YOUR CHILD.

Try to discuss with her , bring her back keeping your as well as her dignity.

If this does not work,and my guess is that her parents must be unsocialised,selfish and VERY careful about her.At least may be only showing for their selfish goal.That goal might be to keep her with them to take care of them.If your wife dont have any brother then above VERY CAREFUL becomes VERY VERY CAREFUL.


Anyway these parents must have kept her under their strong influence,her every decision must be taken by them.if yes it'll be very difficult to cross their strong influential fence.

Do it with the help of her closest friend,common relative,professional collegue,give preference to WOMAN to mediate.Consistent 3-4 interactions may soften her stand.Continue contacting her.Dont cut off communication.

Then might be things will crawl  towards you positively.

Keep confidence level high.Whatever you will do ,do it HONESTLY.

It will deliver the RESULT.

:)

1 Like

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