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SUMEER NARAIN MATHUR (CS)     29 July 2013

Wife's cruelty

Dear Experts ,

Please guide me on a issue the facts of the same are as under :-

1)I AM A MEDDLE CLASS HINDU BOY WHO HAS MARRIED AN UPPER CLASS GIRL OF A DOCTER ,BY AN ARRANGE MARRIGE .I HAD LOST MY FATHER IN THE EARLY DAYS OF SCHOOLS,DUE TO WHICH MY MOTHER DO THE WORK AND EVEN I THROUGH START EARNING SINCE I WAS 18 NOW I AM 33 WE HAVE A GIRL CHILD OF 2 YEARS .

WE TOOK A LOAN FOR MY MARRIGE WHICH I HAD ALREADY REPAID NOW ONLY FEW PAYMENTS ARE PENDING WHICH WILL BE LAST ONLY TILL 2015.

NOW THE ISSUE IS THAT SINCE MY WIFE COME INTO OUR HOME SHE FIRST TARGET MY MOTHER BY DOING BAD BEHAVIOUR WITH HER ,SHOUTING ON HER ,GIVING THRETENING OF SENDING JAIL AND EVEN DO LOTS OF BAD WITH OUR RELATIVES DUE TO WHICH MOST OF THEM STOP COMING TO OUR HOME .

CONSIDERING HER BAD BEHAVIOUR MY MOTHER AND BROTHER HAD LEFT THE HOME ONE YEAR BACK AND STAYING NEAR BY LOCALITY SINCE MY BROTHER IS NOT EDUCATED WELL HE HE GETTING IS GETTING ONLY A NOMINAL SALARY OF 8-9 THOUSAND TOGETHER WITH MY MOTHER WHICH IS NOW OF 63 THEY HARDLY MANAGE THEIR AFFAIRS.

MY WIFE IS FULL OF BACK SUPPORTED BY HER FATHER AND MOTHER THEY THEM SELF TEACH HER WRONG AND PUT BLAME ON MY MOTHER.

NOW EVEN AFTER STAYING SEPERATE FROM MY MOTHER SHE START DOING BAD BEHAVIOUR WITH ME WHICH SHE ALREADY DID MANY TIMES AND EVEN GIVE ME THREATEN OF SENDING JAIL ,SHE USE TO SEARCH ONE THING OR THE OTHER TO DO FIGHT AND ARGUMENTS ON DAILY BASIS SHE HAS A HABIT TO SEND MESSAGES AND CALLS MINUTES AND MINUTES IN OFFICE HOURSE,NOW SHE IS MAKE THE LIFE SO MUCH HELL THAT I FEEL TO KILL MY SELF WHICH WILL BE FAR FAR BETTER THAN PRESENT   OR TO GO FOR TAKING DIVORCE FROM HER .

KINDLY SUGGEST ME THE RIGHT WAY OUT BECOUSE I AM FED UP WITH MY LIFE WHICH IS FULL OF TENSTIONS,SORROWS AND PAIN.

REGARDS

HOPING FOR AN EARLY REPLY FROM SOME OF THIS ESTEEMED CLUB .



Learning

 1 Replies

Rama chary Rachakonda (Secunderabad/Highcourt practice watsapp no.9989324294 )     29 July 2013

1. Love Comes First: Physical love is good, but there has to be genuine spiritual love also in your heart. Your immediate neighbor is your own spouse. So let charity begin at home and set an example by loving your spouse first and foremost. Follow the scriptture: "Love thy neighbor as thyself".

2. Narrow the Gulf: Whether it is a love marriage, arranged marriage or forced marriage, differences are bound to arise. Both of you come from different backgrounds, upbringings and environments. You must be ready to overlook the sharp differences, lapses or shortcomings.

3. Forgive & Forget: Remember, to forgive is divine, and keep doing it, even if you have to repeat this process for infinite times.

4. Begin the Day Cool: Early in the morning, both spouses should try to remain calm and cool. No discussions or arguments in the early morning hours.

5. Silence Can Save: When you leave home for work in the morning, be at your best behavior. If one of you is provoked or complains, silence is the best answer. Conversely, you can say, "We will discuss it in the evening".

6. Inquire & Appreciate: After you return home, inquire and take interest in one another's activity during the day: "How was your day?" You must show your genuine appreciation and sympathy. Top it with a pleasant smile.

7. Listen & Sympathize: Do listen to your spouse attentively and sympathetically. Never ignore. Even at your place of work, if you get a telephone call from your partner, be polite and courteous, in spite of your busy schedule.

8. Don't Forget to Compliment: Make use of "Thank you", "Well done", "You have done a good job", and "I am sorry", as frequently as is necessary. Be generous in your praise and compliments.

9. Don't Compare: Do not enter into comparisons. No one is 100% perfect or 100% imperfect. We all have flaws and shortcomings. Always look at the good qualities of your spouse.

10. Keep Smiling: Be cheerful and smile away your problems. Give a smile as often as you can. Only a human person is endowed with this blessing. Animals do not have this rare faculty. Did you know you use only 20 muscles for a smile but 70 muscles for a frown? So, keep smiling!


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