lovingfather (Project Lead) 12 May 2014

Child custody and maintenance

Hi, We are married for the last 4 and a half years with a 2 and half years daughter. Since first month of our marriage, we had differences and went for marriage counseling in the 10th month of our marriage. My wife and her relatives are extremely cunning and greedy people. My wife left the matrimonial house without informing me 40 days back and her father came saying she does not want to stay with me and wants a divorce. They want a mutual consent divorce, with the custody of my daughter and lot of money, now how do you call it mutual consent divorce? I do not agree to hand over the custody to them at any cost. My wife and her sister were victims of child abuse when they were 10 - 12 years old. Her father left them to marry another women [after his first wife died] and never bothered to take care of his children. Now, understanding this situation, I don't feel my daughter is safe there and also a person who could not take care of his own children, how can I expect him to take care of my daughter. Her entire family is poorly educated, I don't think anyone is a graduate. My wife herself completed her graduation after 2 years of marriage that too by bribing money [I know that because I had to pay]. We were told that she is a graduate, before getting married. On my side, my parents, all mu uncles and aunts, my cousins are post graduates and doctorates. I don't see a future for my daughter if she stays with my wife. Also, one more very important thing, I have been doing most of upbringing of my daughter along with my job. My wife did not work after delivering the baby, but she used to work earlier with almost 30K per month as salary. I do not have any proof neither I am aware on how to prove that my daughter is much more attached to me than my wife. My daughter would not even let my wife brush her [daughters] teeth, or let her give her bath or sleep with my wife. My daughter always wants her dad to do that, because she is more attached to me. Please suggest me on how to take this forward.

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6 Replies

Adv Archana Deshmukh (Practicing Advocate) 12 May 2014

Though your daughter is very attached to you but unfortunately it will be hard for you to get the custody bcoz your daughter is only 2 & 1/2 years old. Custody of a child below the age of 5 years is ordinarily given to the mother. Try to handle the matter out of court to convince your wife to give the daughter to you. Send some relatives or respectable persons of the town to her place and try to settle the matter through mutual talks.

lovingfather (Project Lead) 12 May 2014

Thanks a lot Archana mam for your inputs. My wife's family want to use my daughter as a money vending machine and none of them are caring and would take complete responsibility of my daughter. I have seen and experienced their attitude, but don't have any form of evidence, that's the irony of a loving father.

Adv Archana Deshmukh (Practicing Advocate) 12 May 2014

You can seek visitation rights at this stage. If you want your daughter, you have to take some pains in collecting evidence.

T. Kalaiselvan, Advocate (Advocate) 12 May 2014

As rightly advised by learned Ms. Archana, you may have to play some strategy to retain your child with you unless you may have to give it up. Legal course to have custody of your child will have very remote help to you, reconcile the issues and settle them down amicably.

lovingfather (Project Lead) 13 May 2014

Hi,

Now the major concern or say, a challenge for me, as of now, is the access to my darling daughter. My wife took my DD to her sisters place without informing me and i have not seen her for the last 12 days, i cant tell you how excruciatingly painful this is. I dont want them to say, after a couple of months that the baby is comfortable where she is residing and she should not be removed from her present residence i.e. her sisters place. Its an irony that I, being a natural guardian of the baby, has to claim for visitation rights for my baby from a third person [court]. But lets accept the fact, that is how it is and i COMPLETELY trust and respect the judiciary system of India.

Archana mam, what evidences do i need to collect?

Kalaiselvan Sir, Thanks a lot for your response.

lovingfather (Project Lead) 15 May 2014

Any help here is greatly appreciated. I am looking forward for help from our senior lawyers/advocates. I am held between two extreme emotions [i agree am an emotional fool] strong emotional bond and liking towards my daughter and other being dislike towards my wife. To make it worse i have not seen/met my darling daughter for the last 15 days. can i just go to the place where she is currently residing and meet my daughter? I am little worried about the legal implication of it