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Rahul (Tele Caller)     19 April 2013

Help on divorce

One of my friend already had divorced and this times his second marriage.

When he go to see the girl then he talk with the girl and she not reply him more than one word i.e. YES.

His first marriage was Love marriage. this time arrange marriage the middle man told about girl that she is very simple and carrying and know all house hold work, and her real mother was expired when she was 7-8 years and her step mother tc of her.

All told that she is well behaved and totally perfect material for his family b'coz my friend is only some and his mother is old widow and she is also having back problem.

 

He get married with that girl in his hometown and  come back to Delhi after 7 days of marriage and his mother and wife not come with him b'coz due to some riti riwaz wife should go around one month to her parental home.

Both (Mother and Wife) come to Delhi after one and half month. From day one his wife acts like mental person. She don't recognize him and his mother and most of the time she spent his time on terrace and toilet (she close herself inside the toilet). He can't understand what was going and he call his in-laws but they can't come to him and told him that she may suffer from uppri hawa (Jadu, Tona kind) and told him to bring her to some baba.

Father of his wife come to see her after one month and told my friend that she have some uppri hawa (woh bechara in sabko nahi manta tha par manna pada. woh to apni wife ko AIIMS mai dikha raha tha par inlwas ne kaha ki baba ko dikhao) on there pressure he do all the stuff he went BALA Ji with his wife but nothing goes right with her.

Now he comes to know that she have some mental problem b4 marriage and no one told him about this fact.

 

He arranges a meeting with his in-laws and told them about this FRAUD what they done to him and they told that they informed him about this.

And put blames on him and said that he beat his wife and so many false allegations. His wife is with her parents and they told to my friend that they file a case against him in their hometown.

My friend also wants to give divorce to her b'coz she is mental or not perfect for social life.

 

What should he do to take safe divorce and also the safe himself and his family with false cases?

 

 



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 10 Replies

Tajobsindia (Senior Partner )     19 April 2013

1.    Safe divorce is most probably not possible in reference to brief.

2.    He has to go through all the alleged allegation in filed cases (as and when they are actually registered is what I mean here).

3.    Ask him to prove his innocence as an when required to do so. I suppose now he is experienced as first marriage went divorce way so he is not a new person not to understand basics of Family Law / court procedures.

4.    Better to file divorce on grounds of fraud annexing (if any) diagnosis medical reports and face the music bravely. OR give in to demands of in-laws and get over second time marriage via MCD route showing all these and getting allowed MCD under 1 year of marriage.

Rahul (Tele Caller)     19 April 2013

Yes, he is experianced.

But he don't want to face all thsi again. Main problem is that he is workingin Delhi and his hometyown in Himachal.

If his in-laws fille case in HP then he have to face so many dificulties like travel and taking holidays from his office.

maine suna hai ki agar husband wife dono mai se koi ek bhi abnormal ho to divorce aaram se ho jata hai. Uske pass ladki ke treatment ke paper ki copy hai. Jo shaadi se pehle hua tha aur jo usne karwaya hai. Kya yeh sab kuch help kar saktain hai uski?

 

Tajobsindia (Senior Partner )     19 April 2013

First time you tell us your friend didnot knew about her mental / medical condition.

 

Originally posted by : Rahul

 

XXX

Now he comes to know that she have some mental problem b4 marriage and no one told him about this fact. 

He arranges a meeting with his in-laws and told them about this FRAUD what they done to him and they told that they informed him about this.

XXX 

 

Originally posted by : Rahul

 

XXX
XXX
Uske pass ladki ke treatment ke paper ki copy hai. Jo shaadi se pehle hua tha aur jo usne karwaya hai. Kya yeh sab kuch help kar saktain hai uski?

 

 


 

 

 

In next 7 minutes (the moment you replied and put notes in hinglish at the bottom) you tell us that your friend himself took her for treatment before marriage.

If I join above two then I take back my earlier reply. There is no fraud committed here if your friend has taken her for some treatment before marriage which translates he knew her mental or medical status. .

Distance to travel to contest case is no excuse here as made out. Infact summer time he can be in cool climates if he files a case for divorce (on some grounds he thinks himself now) or MCD. He is meant to suffer for a simple facts in reference of brief that he knew what he is getting into and in my opinion woman in reference to such briefs should not be subject to some sufferings. 

Rahul (Tele Caller)     19 April 2013

Dear friend.

They not informed b4 marriage that she have some kind of mental problem.

They provide documents of premarried treatment after 5 months of marriage when my friend came to know some of resources that she is not well from long time.

My friend and his family not informed and aware about her mentaly status.

I just want to knwo that he have some treatment documents with him they help him in his case?

He try and ask them for MCD, but htey are not ready yet for MCD.

Tajobsindia (Senior Partner )     19 April 2013

I'm sorry either you write in English or hinglish. You have confused me and I am pulling out of your brief Let others guide you accordingly.

[Last reply]

Mrs. JPkhiara (retired)     20 April 2013

My son is married  to Bengali girl from Jodhpur  from his office in Dubai 2 yrs ago in mumbai. We parents are settled in Mumbai. He is being mentally harrassed by her as dubai laws are in fevour of girls and he is a silent sufferer, It is as if it is a fake marriage and the girl has intention for allimony and divorce and agreemnt to put a foot on the way to hell for my son being learned. She earns well as she got a job with my  son having influence in IT firms.

To please her my son cooks the food and all the household expensis are borne by him.

He is not permitted to talk to us and has threated him that if we join him in Dubai, she will put false alligation of DV

There was no witness in her marriage other than her father and mother who are settled in Jodhpur Rajasthan.

She refuses to change her surname after marriage in passport or any other document or office 

Her entire salary and expensive gift is been send to her parents who unnecessary interefere in her affairs.

She is making false records of her illness by going to hospitals to show that she is being tortured. 

She herself is on lots of medications for irregula periods and cold and flue .

Kindly Help,

Thanks and Regards,

Mrs Indu Bhatia (Mother 63 yrs)

 

 

Alok Tholiya (self employed)     20 April 2013

My general comments: 

1. When we buy a property we engage solicitor and investigate the title. I believe a time has come when we engage solicitor, investigate abt all health, wealth, moral issues and give our details in writing or else many of us will get cheated in marriages.

2. If one of the party is able to strongly prove a fraud in marriage then that shakes the whole marriage premises so matter should be expidited and finished in 45 days. IN my case my son in laws was womeniser , we had incidentally found unquestionable proofs to that end but everyone tells that if you go to family court you will win but a contested case will take years so better go for mutual divorce. The reason for mutual divorce can be for non cometibility or for true but case with no evidence. But  for casse loaded with evidence should not need MCD and there should be fast redressal as one of the party is already affected with cheating, fraud etc..

 

3. 

Alok Tholiya (self employed)     20 April 2013

My general comments: 

1. When we buy a property we engage solicitor and investigate the title. I believe a time has come when we engage solicitor, investigate abt all health, wealth, moral issues and give our details in writing or else many of us will get cheated in marriages.

2. If one of the party is able to strongly prove a fraud in marriage then that shakes the whole marriage premises so matter should be expidited and finished in 45 days. IN my case my son in laws was womeniser , we had incidentally found unquestionable proofs to that end but everyone tells that if you go to family court you will win but a contested case will take years so better go for mutual divorce. The reason for mutual divorce can be for non cometibility or for true but case with no evidence. But  for casse loaded with evidence should not need MCD and there should be fast redressal as one of the party is already affected with cheating, fraud etc..

 

3. 

Tajobsindia (Senior Partner )     20 April 2013

@ Mrs. Bhatia,

1.
First of all when expat couple approach Family Court in UAE in most cases Family Laws favor locals over expats.

2. It seems from bare reading the brief a case of one spouse having upper hand in marital relationship and other spouse shown to be taking backseat and case of reverse role models which in feudal society never expects to be dominated by in Indian context is emerging thus this anxious brief before us.

3. Your son can always talk to you without need of informing / seeking permission to/from his wife.  Dubai as well as Indian family laws does not put any bar – restraint.

4. You can always visit Dubai to meet your son and DIL and fear is to be removed that if you visit she will file DV in Dubai. Remedy are always there if any case filed and it is not that it is end of the family – society.

5. If her parents were there at the time of marriage then they are considered as marriage witness.

6. It is purely upto spouse if they want to jointly contribute for home finances or one spouse remits money back home and another solely contributes for home fire. In feudal society if a working female is seen to save and remit her income to her parents then male dominated feudal society does not tolerate such acts of a female.

7. Dubai hospitals are not like Indian hospitals where for few currency exchange under the table false records can be made that also for expats. Locals donot have much regards for expat community to sway for few currency notes if allegations is of such nature. She may be visiting hospitals for valid medical reasons and visit to local hospitals is not cheap by the way.

8. A woman undergoes so many medical issues in her lifetime and irregular periods / flue - cold are acceptable medical issues she faces and to make mountain of the same does not hold merits.

What I see from your query is that you are feeling lonely being senior citizen left out of physical company of your son who married outside his caste to a female whom probably you did not approve and the adult son who is living overseas and may be you are over reacting to daily issues that young couple face due to Arabian Sea communication gap.

It is OK to be anxious of safety, well being of your adult children - son who is married to his colleague probably not of same caste as you were expecting and choose to live overseas with his new bride who is seen as dominant spouse.

If you fear some legal cases may be filed by your DIL on you senior citizens then best would be to debar - disown your son from property (if any) and do not visit - communicate with him till he handles his own alleged to have marital issues afterall he is grown-up and has been brought up - educated by you and now be allowed to start his own nest. It is not ok to interfere - give daily suggestion to grownups on how to handle his matrimony as he is expected to take adult decisions and come out of mama’s shell is my view.

I fully understand our Laws are gender biased but for the same remedy are there which takes years here but all these one should have thought before marriage or allowing him to be married to a woman of his own choice and not afterwards.

Mrs. JPkhiara (retired)     20 April 2013

If there is non coperation from the wife then there will be disharmony, i have even written letter to Star plus Like OK where they have shown many episodes where the wives have created hell in the family especially abetted by the MIL. Kindly send me ur mail id to show how my sister has sufferd in the hands of her daughter in law and the full family went haywire resulting in death of my sister with false alligations followed by death of my brother-in-law and the son had to quit from his mother to save himself.and was not available during her last rights.

I went to dubai to meet my son but they refused to entertain my elder  daughter and my brothr who reside in Dubai. What do u have to tell me about her lavish expensis when my son is running into Loans. We want peaceful family and my son cannot tolerate her not participating with his family memebers and her quarrels with aged parents who come to visit him after 6 months just to spend some fortnight with him. I have left my son to her 365 days, and is it not her duty to entain his parent just for few days.


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