Satish (Team Lead) 08 August 2011

Marriage in trouble

Hi All,

I got married around 15 months back. Its a love marriage. But i was not prepared for marriage when it was imposed on me. Her father was expired and they had a ritual that the elder son/daughter should marry within a year or else they can not marry for another 3 yrs.

So i was emotionally blackmailed and made reay to get marry without my family involvement. Now my marriage life is worse than a hell. My wife force me to stay with her mother and sister as they play a major role in her day to day life. Because of her mother, she is not aware of the responsibilities of a girl after marriage.

It impacted the physical relation also. Sometimes there used to be a month gap between our intercourse.

I am really fed up of this life and get rid of this. Please suggest.

Regards,

Satish

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3 Replies

**Victim** (job) 08 August 2011

Originally posted by :Satish
"	Hi All, I got married around 15 months back. Its a love marriage. But i was not prepared for marriage when it was imposed on me. Her father was expired and they had a ritual that the elder son/daughter should marry within a year or else they can not marry for another 3 yrs. So i was emotionally blackmailed and made reay to get marry without my family involvement. Now my marriage life is worse than a hell. My wife force me to stay with her mother and sister as they play a major role in her day to day life. Because of her mother, she is not aware of the responsibilities of a girl after marriage. It impacted the physical relation also. Sometimes there used to be a month gap between our intercourse. I am really fed up of this life and get rid of this. Please suggest. Regards, Satish	"

Sathish as far as law is concerned u will be liable to maintain your wife but not your mother in law. I suggest you take steps very carefully because your problem is not that big that you should take any unnecessary steps. Although if it turns out a big deal then you should seek lawyers advise. May i ask you are u planning to give her divorce ? If yes. then be prepared to maintain her ......under sec Crpc 125.

If you are not planning to divorce her then ask her to move out of her mothers house and live with you seperately as long as there is no neglect from your side you don't have to face any problems. Law doesn't force u to live with ur mother in law u r free to move out but make sure u take ur wife with u.

Saurabh..V (Law Consultant) 08 August 2011

@Author

You have admitted to the biggest mistake of your life. You got fooled by this girl about a FALSE ritual of marriage. Do you think that any family who is under deep sorrow having lost the head of the family to perform celebrations and marriage within a year. Rather it should be that no one should get married within a year. This is so lame of you to have succumbed to her pressure.

Her tactics worked wonders for her because now you are maintaining the girl, her mother and her sister. I don't feel strange that you are in this situation. It was bound to happen. And let me warn you, as soon as you think about leaving this girl, she would dump you in the garbage of cases like 498A, DV Act, Maintenance etc. because if you are gone, who would take care of her family.

Take steps with caution. It's very critical time. You are not the one who has to maintain whole family of bride. Only bride is your responsibility. Start gathering evidences which would show that she is only taking advantage of yours. Though it's enthical but I would suggest you to start fabricating evidences to show that your wife is creating problems in your life. Not allowing physical pleasure is also cruelity against the spouse and this makes a ground for divorce. See a good lawyer to get your case doctored.

//peace

/Saurabh..V

AA RAMAKRISHNAN (SR. ADVOCATE) 08 August 2011

Your problem is not that grave as far as thinking of breaking the marriage. You are a prudent man and should act wisely, intelligently and systematically. Law is apart, ask your wife to behave. It is quite natural that the lady should feel unsecure after the death of her husband and starts to behave accordingly. Now she will make all efforts to see that her children should show sympathy and obey her instructions and support her likings and dislikings. She expects the same thing from you also. This is a transition period and unluckily you feel to suffer because you are not getting the love and care one should get at the post period of your marriage. In the efflux of time the things will improve. You need not take any hard step. You discuss with your wife and her mother and your difficulties can be sorted out.