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Pragnesh Nathavat (physical therapist)     21 March 2010

lawyers pls help me thru this challenge.

 

Hi, I m a physio therapist and my wife is a pharmacist. She is earning Rs. 18000 pm. My case details are as under.

 

24/6/2007.  I got married

 

8/6/2008 my wife left my home at her own and took all her belongings and our jewelleries too.

 

26/6/2008. she served me a notice stating that I and my parents have harassed her a lot, including allegations of me taking half of her salary every month. And my parents making her do all household work. And also stated as she did not want to break her home she wants to live with me alone, not with my parents. (that was her primary desire since marriage)

 

28/6/2008. I replied thru a hand written letter that I deny all the allegations by her. And I am not ready to live with her alone away from my parents.

 

5/7/2008. I received a letter by her advocate that she has arranged her own house near her parents’ home and I shud join her there.

 

 

22/7/2008. I again replied by letter that I am not interested to join where she lives. And I also stated that its her duty to live where I live in whatever condition I live.

 

26/8/2008. I received a notice with allegations of dowry and physical-mental harassment to her, stating that I should return her 8,00,000 rs of dowry (which was never given) or they will file FIR.

 

1/9/2008. I replied to her notice (by advocate this time) stating that all allegations of dowry, physical and mental harassment etc are false and she should come back to join my house as her duty and right.

 

3/1/2009. I again sent her notice through advocate to return back to my home otherwise we will file RCR thru section 9 of HMA. They receive this notice on next day e.g. 4/1/2009.

 

5/1/2009. She filed an FIR under 498 A which included allegations of dowry demand and physical mental harassment.

 

22/1/2009. police arrested me and parents and we got the bail within an hour.

 

23/1/2009. we filed an RCR suit in family court.

 

13/7/2009. they replied to our RCR, that she was threatened by me to death, and to burn her alive for dowry demand that’s why she doesn’t want to join me or my home. (this thing was never mentioned in any previous notice or not even in 498A FIR). In her reply she continued all other allegations but this time also added my extra marital affairs with many ladies. (even this was never mentioned in any of previous notice communication)

 

 

4/8/2009. she also filed crpc 125 for maintainance. She accepted that she earns 18000 per month but stated that I earn 150000 per month (I have never seen such a big amount in my life). So she needs maintenance of rs 45000 pm. In this petition she stated sum of all allegations till now.

 

8/11/2009. she filed a domestic violence case against me. Asking for maintenance and Rs. 20 lakh compensation for harassment and one house for living.

 

9/3/2010. this was the day for my cross examination in RCR section 9 case. I was fully prepared to face her lawyer’s questions. But to all my surprise she submitted an affidavit stating “I am ready to live with my husband, I feel since last few months that he needs me. I want to join him from today only.” And I really did not want her back after so many false cases. I was just dumb in front of judge and my advocate was also surprised by this affidavit. My advocate asked for 3 days time to judge.

 

12/3/2010. As per my advocate’s advice I withdrew RCR stating an affidavit that now circumstances have changed and we are planning to file a divorce petition. So my RCR was withdrawn.

 

19/3/2010. we filed a divorce petition taking the ground of cruelty that she made on me and my parents thru all false allegations, complaints and cases.

 

My questions are…

  1. what will be the fate of my case/cases?
  2. I will have to give her maintenance?
  3. How much more time will be wasted to get rid of her? And in fact, would I be ever able to get rid of her?

 

Please note that I have preserved all copies and originals of my notice/letters and hers also. 



Learning

 11 Replies

Adv Archana Deshmukh (Practicing Advocate)     21 March 2010

The fate of your cases will depend upon the evidence and circumstances of the case.  The written communication between both of you shall help you to show that all her allegations are her afterthought stories. If she is capable of maintaining herself you'll not have to give her any maintainance. If you are earning a smail salary compared to what she had stated, then file the proof of the same in the maintainance case.

1 Like

(Guest)

1. Sh Prabhakar ji's advise sums up all issues between you. The stated guidance needs to be followed logically and both of you will live happy either together and/or in opposite directions.
2. Be human first before being a professional (as gather from your job discripttion)
All the best.

1 Like

Pragnesh Nathavat (physical therapist)     22 March 2010

dear prabhakar sir,

u r absolutely correct. she wanted to pressurise me for separate living. i know that we loved each other so much, till she put allegations like dowry, and mar pit etc. i still loved her. she filed and 498 A and my parents and me went thru the police station first time, we had to blacken our hands for finger prints, we went thru hell. i still loved her. but i was really confused when i filed RCR. after that she started allegating threats to death by me and my x marital afairs and then i left the hope and made my mind to take revenge. i love her no more. her brother is an advocate who has done all these. i cant sleep at nights when i think of alll these allegations which are made by a person with whom i have spent so many days and nights and whom i have loved so much.

Kulveer ( )     22 March 2010

Hi Pragnesh,

 

I am also apprehending false 498A, DV etc shortly and since last one year I am doing lots of research on this nonsense topic. Here are my suggestions to you-

 

-After her filing affidavit for reunion with you, you are in a good position to win 498A if you fight (but this case can go in for 3 - 7 years). After winning 498A you will get ex-parte divorce as 498A is considered mental cruelty and it is a ground of divorce.

 

-As in some of the listings above, it is said that she is innocent and did not know about legal matters. How can anyone remain innocent and uninformed of legal matters in the course of one year of legal proceedings? As you have mentioned that these things are going since last one year. How can she remain completely uninformed of these matters for full one year? Personally I won't suggest you to continue your life with her, now just moved ahead and fight her 498A case, 90% of these false cases are won by boy side.

 

-As you have mentioned that she sent you the notice to return 8,00,000 Rs dowry they gave. Go ahead and file FIR against them for giving dowry against whole of their family, as giving dowry is also a crime. Take help of your lawyer in that.

 

-As you and your family members are already out on bail so they cannot do any more harm too you and your family members. They have already exhausted their all options and that is why they want reunion with you as they don't have any other weapon left with them.

 

My suggestions to you are - start living your life normally, continue with your job, fight your 498A with cool and calm mind, discuss with your lawyer about filing counter cases against her. They will come under pressure with that and can approach to you for withdrawing their cases - and you can negotiate that for mutual consent divorce along with withdrawal of all the cases, as before bail it is boy side who is in pressure and post bail it is the girl side who is in pressure.

 

Best of luck.

1 Like

dawood ahmed (advocate)     03 April 2010

Mr, Pragnesh, Life is not all about ego, mistakes and litigation. Unless one is determined to live alone the entire life one must also know to excuse other. Most of the matrimonial cases are the result of un-though over advices. If you follow the advice of learned brother Prabhakar, you stll have a chance for following the idea of Mr. Kulveer Singh but not viceversa. i.e. if you first follow the advice of Mr. Kulveer Singh ji, you will not have a chance to follow the appreciable advice of Mr. Prabhakar Ji. Under the circumstances give a chance to your wife and in all probabilities it may turn out to be the best act of your life.

1 Like

girishankar (manager)     10 April 2010

Thanks Sirs

mahendrakumar (marketing)     10 April 2010

dear pragnesh,

have you ever tried the therapy you are practicing on others on your own life?

 

"COMPROMISING" doesnot mean,that you are wrong and the other person is right,It only means that,you value your "RELATIONSHIP" much more than your 'EGO".

1 Like

Parth Chandra (none)     12 April 2010

Pragnesh,

I am also a victim of these biased laws since three months

Though I respect all the experts very much ... but keep following things in mind before taking her back. The girl who....

1) Did not think of your career, mental disturbance, health, money and above all the person who loved her during this one year can not be brought back as in another moment of provocation and anger she may do the same again.

2) You are lucky that you don't have any kids involved ... I have observed once Kids come out of wed lock women start to feel superior and start to think that now they have licence to do whatever they wish....If would bring her back and you would have a kid .. then would be very difficult for you to handle the situation mentally as most law allows women to keep the child to certain age.

3) If you would allow a women to come back after filing all these cases against you and making you and your parents along with criminals and after all you would take her back .. then it would set a very wrong example for her and the society .. that women can do whatever they want .. then can harm any one ... and after doing all these she would be either given what she wishes to or would be taken back without any harm

 

I am facing exteme mental difficulties as in my case my 3 year old daughter is involved....don't be in my situation...I m sure you would be if you allow her to come back (As there would be her hidden desire to separate you from you family which would jump back time n again).

think by mind and not by heart....all the very best.

1 Like

girishankar (manager)     12 April 2010

Dear Sirs ,

Mr.Prabhakar Sir is right he has adviced you in a Fatherly Manner.. think for a while Hasty desicions will put lives in a Nasty Position..... If am Wrong or Hurting Please Pardon......


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