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logeshwaran v   14 May 2019

Wife not returning back.

Dear All,

We are Hindu couple married for 3 years(Running), Both of us are working.

We live with my Parents, Father is retired (with pension 40k per month), Mother is homemaker.(Both are senior citizens)

I have a younger Sister who is persuing her MS in USA.

post marriage every thing was good ,we were in love as every newly wed couples would be. 15 Dec 2018 my wife gave entire family a gift which none other can match, a Baby boy(Not because he was a boy but a little life of joy and tender love), Whole family was overwhelmed with Joy.

now comes the part , it's been 6 months since she went to my In laws house ,now refusing to come back stating she wants to live separately from my parents.

Reason
Need house nearby her office so that she travel less.

Currently we are situated in my house which is 25KM from her office , I too travel such distance on daily basis for my work.

my financial situation is currently not in favour of taking a costly house in heart of Chennai city when I am paying already 50pct of my monthly earning on loans.
rest of the money goes for monthly expenses and savings.

Last two years have been financially tolling on family as we concluded the marriage and within 6 months Sister was traveling to US to study, the entire expense was taken by my father and myself which as of now close to (RS 75 lacs), which she says will repay once she gets job.

Amid all this financial crunch I just expected my wife to be with for emotional support, even she offered her Jewels for expense to sister, however my mother refused it saying Daughter in law 's jewel is last resort if it is needed.

everything was ok the day my wife went to my in law house since we were expecting first baby.

her behaviour started changing, whenever we visited my in law house we were treated badly, even water was not offered in one occasion.

Still I and members of my family ,extended family will visit my wife and boy.

Things started worsening, as one day I asked her 8k from her Salary, as I had loss of pay in that month due to leaves I had taken to visit them, she bluntly refused saying she doesn't need an husband who earns 4 times more than her, still ask for money. (literally that was the first time in three years I has asked for money due to genienue reason).

she earns 21k per month and post marriage I asked her to put 10k as monthly SIP in mutual funds, which can be used later (10 year plan), ret of it she spends on her transport and girly expenses). I only follow her up for funding joint account for SIP, I myself spend 20k per month for savings.


I enquired and just found out she has a loan of 10 lacs on her which her father to in her name , and now she wants to repay that back, and the day she went to her house she withdrew all the money of till now savings and gave to her father. I don't have any idea about her Jewels which she took with her self(not bothered much if my in laws takes mine or my father permission to take those back for some requirment we would have said yes.)

now my wife says she wants to live separately from my in city centre and my entire salary to be given to her, she will take care of family expense( however that obviously will not be clear which family).

With all these happening my trust have reduced.

My self and my parents have vsist d my in laws house 3 times asking for dates to be fixed for her return but every time argument comes and I have to return without any desired result.

I now feel very insulted the way her entire family behaved with us and stopped visiting her. I have taken emotionally toll taking decision of even not seenng my kid till he is in that house.


it's been 2 months 12 days I have not seen my wife and kid, not even on video call. all communication is cut off.

I want to be patient with this matter and want my wife to realize her mistakes and come back to family.

however some relatives are asking me to go for restitution of conjugal right petition to court.

Will this be a right process to go for. guidence pls.

Thanks


Learning

 4 Replies

Arunesh Roy (AM- Internal Audit)     14 May 2019

Court interference is not recommended at this stage. Look at the positive aspects in the entire ordeal narrated by you. Your wife does not want separation. She only wishes to live separately. You may involve some common family friend to amicably resolve the matter. Court interference will only worsen the situation.
1 Like

Shashi Dhara   14 May 2019

U keep quiet for 6months don't contact her or send any person's for negotiations .at that time she may realise herself and may come.with u.if nothing happens then after wards urself meet her and convince her and what she expects from u and Ur family.and then proceed.
1 Like

Adv Deepak Joshi +917017821512 (Advocate)     14 May 2019

take help of senior of both the family, legal course will add more heat.

logeshwaran v   15 May 2019

Thank you Mr Arunesh, Deepak and Shasi..

Yes I have decided not to give in to such blackmail which is backed by possible ill advise some of her relatives and Mother.

will wait for 6-7 months more and see if it is resolved amicably and everyone lives their life happily.

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