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Kavitha Menon (Others)     24 May 2016

Child access

Dear Lawyers:

I've been fighting a divorce case for more than 4 years now. I wish to understand the possibilities for child access. My ex's parents and brother are very abusive both verbally and physically especially my ex father-in-law. He abuses his own mentally challegend son who is the eldest of his four sons in the family. And he abuses him both verbally and physically. And he looks fown upon women in his family. He ill-treats his wife too. So, it's a very abusive and emotionally unstable enviornment at their home and my ex lives with them.

My ex has filed for child access during my son's vaction, and he is only 4.5 years old. I argued with his lawyer and expressed my concerns before the judge. I told the judge that I am not against child access but that how can I send my 4.5 years old son to an emotionally unstable and abusive enviornemnt. And my son hasn't met his them except for my ex and his mother. My son meets my ex because he knows I am out waiting at the child access center in the court. This would be absolutely traumatic for my son to be away from me for such long hours. Moreover, my son has a sleep condition wherein he must get his afternoon nap or he wakes up shivering and crying inconsalbly in the middle of night. He does not recognize where he is and even though I am holding him and consoling him he cries out loud asking for me.

Despite of all this, the judge ruled out against it. And said I am not following the orders. I have told that am not aganist child access but only that I cannot send my sone to an emotionally unstable and abusive enviornment. But the court has completely misjudged and misunderstood a mother's intention of the well-being of the child. So, I plan to appeal at HC. Please guide and advise me. It's a genuine concern. 

Thank you for your time and attention. I value it.

Regards,

Kavita

 



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 24 Replies

Kavitha Menon (Others)     25 May 2016

I plan to move to HC. Please advice and guide. Thank you.

Vakalath (Vakeel No. 1)     25 May 2016

Originally posted by : Kavita
Dear Lawyers:

I've been fighting a divorce case for more than 4 years now. I wish to understand the possibilities for child access. My ex's parents and brother are very abusive both verbally and physically especially my ex father-in-law. He abuses his own mentally challegend son who is the eldest of his four sons in the family. And he abuses him both verbally and physically. And he looks fown upon women in his family. He ill-treats his wife too. So, it's a very abusive and emotionally unstable enviornment at their home and my ex lives with them.

My ex has filed for child access during my son's vaction, and he is only 4.5 years old. I argued with his lawyer and expressed my concerns before the judge. I told the judge that I am not against child access but that how can I send my 4.5 years old son to an emotionally unstable and abusive enviornemnt. And my son hasn't met his them except for my ex and his mother. My son meets my ex because he knows I am out waiting at the child access center in the court. This would be absolutely traumatic for my son to be away from me for such long hours. Moreover, my son has a sleep condition wherein he must get his afternoon nap or he wakes up shivering and crying inconsalbly in the middle of night. He does not recognize where he is and even though I am holding him and consoling him he cries out loud asking for me.

Despite of all this, the judge ruled out against it. And said I am not following the orders. I have told that am not aganist child access but only that I cannot send my sone to an emotionally unstable and abusive enviornment. But the court has completely misjudged and misunderstood a mother's intention of the well-being of the child. So, I plan to appeal at HC. Please guide and advise me. It's a genuine concern. 

Thank you for your time and attention. I value it.

Regards,

Kavita

 

Your case is like you "serve payasam to cranes in plates" where court has already ordered visitation rights aptly to the father, your argument even Supreme Court wont agree with, going to High Court with such foolish argument will be not only waste of time, but will me making a fool out of yourself in eyes not just of society, but in the kid's too.

 

 

Matters like these have to be thought before making first shake hand, once you did not think then, there is no point in thinking about anything now.  Only the child will suffer because of you and nobody else.

 

Be accomodative to your husband and parent-in-laws and you will have some respect in the eyes of the kid as it grows up.  Or there will sure come a day in fuutre that the kid itself will slap you for what you did to it because of your ego.  Remember that you heard it here first from me, incase nobody told you this.

Kavitha Menon (Others)     25 May 2016

Wow Mr. Vakalth! Don't teach about parenting skills. You have NO right to judge me! Men like you are hell on earth! You are the ones who encourage violence and harassment against women! Absolutely non-compassionate, insensitive! It's evident you are a male chauvinist! Dooomed are the women who come to you for any legal advice!

Kavitha Menon (Others)     25 May 2016

Wow Mr. Vakalth! Don't teach me about parenting skills. You have NO right to judge me when you don't know the options I had to choose from! The grandparents are one of the main concerns who lead to the siatuation in my life! You have no idea what hell they have put me though! So, keep your opinions to yourself! If you can't help, at least don't hurt people here! I have enough on my plate to deal with! The father and the grandparents haven't turned once to look after me and my son's needs. I am struggling to make both ends meet ever day!

People like you are hell on earth! You are the ones who encourage violence and harassment against women! Absolutely non-compassionate, insensitive, demonic, and cold! It's evident you are a male chauvinist! Dooomed are the women who come to you for any legal advice!

Dana Kayoni (Expert Humanitarian and Lawyer)     25 May 2016

Originally posted by : Kavita
Dear Lawyers:

I've been fighting a divorce case for more than 4 years now. I wish to understand the possibilities for child access. My ex's parents and brother are very abusive both verbally and physically especially my ex father-in-law. He abuses his own mentally challegend son who is the eldest of his four sons in the family. And he abuses him both verbally and physically. And he looks fown upon women in his family. He ill-treats his wife too. So, it's a very abusive and emotionally unstable enviornment at their home and my ex lives with them.

My ex has filed for child access during my son's vaction, and he is only 4.5 years old. I argued with his lawyer and expressed my concerns before the judge. I told the judge that I am not against child access but that how can I send my 4.5 years old son to an emotionally unstable and abusive enviornemnt. And my son hasn't met his them except for my ex and his mother. My son meets my ex because he knows I am out waiting at the child access center in the court. This would be absolutely traumatic for my son to be away from me for such long hours. Moreover, my son has a sleep condition wherein he must get his afternoon nap or he wakes up shivering and crying inconsalbly in the middle of night. He does not recognize where he is and even though I am holding him and consoling him he cries out loud asking for me.

Despite of all this, the judge ruled out against it. And said I am not following the orders. I have told that am not aganist child access but only that I cannot send my sone to an emotionally unstable and abusive enviornment. But the court has completely misjudged and misunderstood a mother's intention of the well-being of the child. So, I plan to appeal at HC. Please guide and advise me. It's a genuine concern. 

Thank you for your time and attention. I value it.

Regards,

Kavita

 

You are building premise in order to get favorable advice.  But dear your matter already got solved in court, that is lower court.  Now if you have quams, you have to approach High Court.  But until that time will your husband keep quiet? Execution application will be filed and once that is done, police will come and pick kid and drop it at the fathers place, and this will continue till whatever time kid is alive and does not reach 21 years of age.  The father has as much right on the kid as you, and no court will agree to what you said.  I do not find anything wrong in the advises of Mr Vakalath and autohide123.  You need to learn to accomodate.  I just wish as time passes your own son will not see you as a villain.  Try to maintain good image in mind of the kid also, you have already spoiled the mind of the kid, dont spoil it even more Kavitha.  Rest your wish to approach Honourable High Court. 

2 Like

Kavitha Menon (Others)     25 May 2016

Mind your language JERK! MALE CHAUVINIST! Children suffer because they have JERKS like you parenting! You are an EXAMPLE!

Dr Martin Campbell (Doctor)     25 May 2016

It is better to give off custody and visitation rights case, instead of troubling young mind.  This advice is to the father of the kid.

For the mother however  there are many options- Ghoda he maidan heh. LC/HC/SC/LC police etc etc

2 Like

Kavitha Menon (Others)     25 May 2016

This is a public forum whoever Mr. AutoReply12345 you are! You sound like a Victim! Well, I am not surprised at that! This is a public forum and I respect it! Or else I know how to take to task FREAKS like you! Shitheads like you don't deserve to be on on this or any planet in the universe!God bless the family you are in!

Kavitha Menon (Others)     25 May 2016

Hi Dana: You like Mr. Vakalth & Autoreply have completely misjudged and misunderstood my intentions. Please re-read my post. I have mentioned I am not against child access but since my FIL is highly abusive both verbally and physically I have said I can't sent my son to that enviornment! Will you send your kids to such an abusive enviornment? I am aggrieved by interim order of family court and is why I am making a move the HC for necessary reliefs. PLEASE NOTE: Again I am willing to give father access to the child in a public place but not at the residence of his joint family as FIL is abusive by nature and I fear for safety of the child. My FIL doesn't spare his own mentally challenged son! He hits him and abuses him!

Kavitha Menon (Others)     25 May 2016

Thank you Dr. Martin Campbell! God bless you! I'm glad that finally somebody here has the heart to understand my concerns! No mother will ever agree to sending her 4.5 year old child to an emotionally abusive and unstable enviornment. My ex didn't look back all these four years. And now he has returned for access only to trouble me. He literally said that to me! I am bearing all the expenses including a huge EMI of home loan which is more than half of my salary I earn. He never paid for the child vaccinations, my pregnancy expenses, his expenses all I had to bear! I have all the necessary evidence including my bank statements for past 5 years. I bought him a bullet out of my life savings, and he took that away!After separation, when I was out of town he also broke into my house and stole away my laptop, my son's original birth certificate, and some piece of my wedding jewelry. I had to go to work on 2 wheeler even in my 8th month of pregnancy. And he would take the car to office. If it was not for my office colleagues who were concerned about me driving so far in my 8th month pregnancy, I cud have face serious delivery complications. All this is just an iota of what I have gone through apart from the physical and mental trauma for the 7 years of my marriage.

Eminem   25 May 2016

Auto looks like he has had a trouble childhood or had a strict mother, or maybe has had issues with women in his family and has been completely dominated by women members around him. My God, he sounds like a person who has childhood issues with the opposite gender. 

Maybe even s*xually abused while he was growing up. Been 'Used' in some way or the other and left. Or definitely faced too many rejections from female colleagues (for various advances)... I guess all of the above. All the posts are very demeaning and derogatory. It simplypoints to one thing that he has very low self esteem. Certainly some of these cases I have seen seem to have a drive towards women's clothing, especially lingerie, in secrecy of their own rooms....

The lady here just wanted a legal advise not a 'Family Guru' there are many around and a fine lady would not look into a legal forum to find one.

I read the professional response from Ms Dana. Wow, an example of How a WOMAN responds. I almost feel sorry for his state of being. Probably its time for him to wake up and treat women with more respect. Watching that Ad on TV 'Maybe its time that women should teach that Boys don't make Women Cry' would do good.

I feel ashamed that people like him belong to the same category as I do - a Man.. or at least what they appear to be. The arrogant display of that behaviour is a clear indication that people like them have the need of more 'Spanking' - if I may.

And some professional help for childhood mishaps. They need it !! They must try to fit into the society, Help is just a call away. 

Such kinds don't even sound like professional and have some upbringing issues that need to be addressed.

I mean seriously, like Ms Kavita said, What A Shame in the name of being a Man... What Good did you do for your society being that Gender? What? you became a lawyer with a name Autoreply1234? ROFL... LMAOlaugh 

Kavitha Menon (Others)     25 May 2016

Hey Eminem:

Thank God there are also Men like you! Thank you for understanding and extending your support here. I appreciate it. God bless you!

And yes I agree Mr. Auto definetly is HIGHLY TROUBLED and NEEDS HELP! God bless him too!

Regards,

Kavita

 

Eminem   25 May 2016

Ms Kavita, you have my full support when perv like these crop up as they do not have those two 'things' to challenge the situation. They are just here to judge the yard with what they think is 'Long' and makes them a Man.

Just Ignore Them, I've seen many such fools around.

Kavitha Menon (Others)     25 May 2016

Sure Eminem! I get it! 


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