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NATARAJAN IYER (Proprietor)     05 November 2014

All victimized men - move to peace

All MEN accessing this Forum - Here is one article that would really ensure peace in your life. This article is meant for the target audience of Men who are TRULY the victims. This article is NOT intended for the men who have been brutes, savages, inhuman, perverts, cruel and cheats, for such men who shed crocodile tears.

" THE LAST PART OF THIS ARTICLE IS THE CLIMAX AND YOUR WEAPON for SUCCESS ".

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For a Long time now, I would just observe the queries by men on this forum. Seeking answers to questions on divorce and maintenance. I would not log in. I would just read. I was determined to write only after I listen.

Please Read this. Even if Lengthy, it is worth every single word. Take it as a sincere advise or as a write-up, the choice is yours.

But if you read this and THINK DEEPLY, you will be successful in EXTRACTING THE PIECE OF WISDOM WITHIN YOUR OWN MIND, all by YOURSELF without any help from anybody ( Police, Public, Lawyers, Courts, Relatives, Friends,...etc ).

______________________________________________________________________________________

All my dear brothers on this forum,

You each shout, cry, curse,...etc etc etc on this forum. It is natural. You are in doubt. You are angry. You are upset. You have been sent to Jail. Your Family has been humiliated. Your Money has been snatched, in the name of maintenance. 

Fault might be yours. Fault might be your wife's. Fault might be your family's. Fault might be her family's. Fault might be your group of supporters' and advisors'. Fault might be that of your wife's group of supporters' and advisors'.

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EACH OF YOU, DEAR BROTHERS, EACH OF YOU FORGET THE BASIC LAW OF THE SIMPLE LAW OF NATURE AND THE LAW OF THE LAND.

THAT BASIC LAW IS :

 

" IN ANY FIGHT, DECIDE WHICH OF THESE TWO YOU WANT ? "

 

A) EXIT

or

B) ENTANGLEMENT

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If you want to EXIT, then any lawyer and any court has a easy task and can come to your help.

But, If you want to get ENTANGLED, then my dear brothers, YOU have to do the STRATEGY part. 

Others, including the lawyers, might give you some general tips.

But, since every individual's life and family is UNIQUE, only YOU know which will work for you, taking into account, all three phases of your LIFE....The Past, The Present and The Future.

So, STRATEGY, only you can do BEST for your LIFE PROBLEM.

_____________________________________________________________________________________

Now you are all crying and cursing here.

But, honestly speaking, without cheating yourself, think well and answer yourself.

How many of you were 

 

ALERT FROM DAY ONE ?

 

AS A MAN, DO YOU NOT KNOW THE SIMPLE FORMULA OF SURVIVAL IN A STREET FIGHT ?

 

THE FORMULA OF

 

" THE MAN WHO MANAGES THE DISTANCE, MANAGES THE DAMAGE  ".

 

How many of you, sensing danger, managed to keep your wife's family and people at a SAFE DISTANCE from your family ?

 

Today, after permitting the relatives, friends, lawyers, NGOs, Rowdy, Police,...etc all representing your WIFE, to climb the TREE of your FAMILY, you are crying and cursing that they each DAMAGED THE BRANCHES AND LEAVES OF YOUR FAMILY TREE AND EVEN AFTER BEING PUSHED DOWN BY THE LAW, THEY ARE CONTINUOUSLY DOING SOME OR THE OTHER MISCHIEF TO ERASE YOUR FAMILY AT THE ROOT ITSELF AND SETTING FIRE TO THE ENTIRE FAMILY TREE ITSELF ?

 

____________________________________________________________________________________

 

How many of you smartly OBTAINED A RESTRAINT ORDER ( CIVIL AND CRIMINAL ) against your in-laws and your wife's people, even before your matrimonial issue blew up ?

 

Forget 498A, DV,...etc...They could not even have CONTACTED your wife by phone...if you had a criminal restraint order against them.

when the order expires, you can apply for renewal.

 

Every time, you should have convinced the law that HER PHONE CALLS AND HER FAMILY ARE SPOILING AND DAMAGING YOUR FAMILY LIFE...YOUR MATRIMONIAL LIFE...SINCE WHENEVER THEY INTERACT WITH HER, WITHIN SOME TIME, QUARELLS BEGIN BETWEEN YOU AND YOUR WIFE.

 

IMAGINE THE PSYCHOLOGICAL IMPACT OF SUCH A BLOW TO THEM, EVEN BEFORE THEY LAY THE FOUNDATION FOR A FUTURE 498A, DV,...etc.

 

True that a 498A and a DV can be filed any-time, but the chances of such a case holding water in law, against you would have been very very meagre....Given the fact that YOU HAVE ALREADY DILUTED THE CASE.

 

WITH SUCH RESTRAINT ORDERS OBTAINED, IT COULD ALWAYS BE PROVEN THAT THEY ARE getting into filing of 498A, DV,..etc FOR REVENGE AND by such acts, they are

 

1. DEFAMING YOU

2. DAMAGING YOUR MATRIMONIAL LIFE

3. CAUSING HARM TO YOU AND YOUR FAMILY

4. CAUSING YOU MENTAL AGONY,...etc etc etc

____________________________________________________________________________________

 

How many of you stopped that SONG of

 

I AM A MAN...

NOW YOU SEE WHAT I DO...

DO YOU KNOW WHO I AM....etc etc etc

How many of you TOOK QUICK PRACTICAL STEPS ?

 

ACTUALLY, BY USING OR MIS-USING THE RIGHT SECTIONS OF THE LAW, either by HER OWN BRAINS or by BORROWING THE BRAIN OF HER LAWYER AND OTHERS, YOUR WIFE HAS NAILED YOU.

 

SO, WHO IS SMART ? 

 

YOU or your WIFE ?

 

You under-estimated your wife by saying " she cannot be that smart. what does she know ? "...etc etc

 

COME ON, my dear brothers...WAKE UP....GET REAL...SHE HAS PROVEN TO BE SMARTER.

 

ACCEPT IT AND SEE HOW YOU QUICKLY ARRIVE AT A SOLUTION.

 

DO NOT CHEAT YOURSELF ANYMORE. 

 

ACCEPT IT THAT IT IS REAL THAT SHE PROVED TO BE SMARTER THAN YOU.

 

THAT SMARTNESS COULD BE IN HER OWN BLOOD OR THROUGH YOUR BLOOD IN HER BODY. THAT IS DIFFERENT.

 

NETT-NETT, she proved to be SMARTER than you.

 

____________________________________________________________________________________

 

she used HER OWN BRAINS or BORROWED THE BRAINS of her LAWYER, FAMILY, FRIENDS,...etc to OUT-SMART YOU, that is a  different story.

 

___________________________________________________________________________________

 

DID SHE OUT-SMART YOU ?

 

THE ANSWER IS A BIG " YES ".

 

OK, NOW YOU DECIDE what you have to DO.

 

GO BACK TO THE BASIC FORMULA OF NATURE.

 

WHAT DO YOU WANT ?

 

EXIT FROM THE FIGHT AND OPPONENT

 

OR

 

ENTANGLE WITH THE OPPONENT AND THE FIGHT.

 

WHAT DO YOU WANT ?

 

Decide that first.

 

___________________________________________________________________________________

 

My dear brothers,

REMEMBER THE SIMPLE FORMULA OF LIFE.

 

A WIFE IS WITH YOU, even if you suffer from an INCURABLE DISEASE. That is why she is called a LIFE- PARTNER.

 

NINETY PERCENT OF WOMEN IN INDIA are NORMAL and SINCERE LIFE-PARTNERS.

 

TEN PERCENT OF WOMEN ARE THE WORST, ABNORMAL AND DETERMINED LIFE-SNATCHERS.

 

With such a woman, it is better you DO NOT live. You are wasting your TIME, MONEY and ENERGY with such a WORTH-LESS woman. She will NEVER CHANGE HER WAYS. 

 

IT IS BETTER TO DONATE YOUR ORGANS AND LIE PARALYZED AND BEGGING ON THE STREETS BUT ALIVE WITH YOUR DIGNITY, RATHER THAN LIVE WITH SUCH A WIFE AND WITHOUT THE BASIC DIGNITY AS A MAN.

 

____________________________________________________________________________________

 

Now, the Last Part. ... MOST IMPORTANT PART.

 

VISUALIZE

 

VISUALIZE within your MIND

 

VISUALIZE within your MIND.....  You have entered a DARK ROOM and you light a LAMP. A small Lamp. 

 

whatever OIL you had with you, you have used that to light this LAMP.

 

__________________________________

 

This Lamp represents your FAMILY.

 

The Oil in the Lamp represents TIME.

 

The wick of the lamp represents your  AGE.

 

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Now, you see that the Room is filled with BUNDLES OF PAPER THAT YOU HAVE TO TIE UP NEATLY so that you can OCCUPY THAT ROOM, peacefully and start leading the normal, routine life.

 

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These BUNDLES of PAPER represent the LIST OF RESPONSIBILITIES that you have towards your family and life.

 

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To tie these bundles neatly, in a DARK CORNER of the room, you see a LENGTHY ROPE.

 

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That DARK CORNER represents your UNKNOWN LIFE and the UNCERTAIN FUTURE.

 

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That ROPE represents YOUR WIFE.

 

__________________________________________

 

You walk there to the dark corner to pick that ROPE.

 

IT IS FILLED WITH DUST, DUST-MITES, SCORPIONS, SPIDERS, ANTS, POISONOUS INSECTS and BABY SNAKES.

 

VISUALIZE WITHIN YOUR MIND NOW.

________________________________________________________________________________

 

NOW, VISUALIZE WITHIN YOUR MIND, YOUR HAND HOLDING THOSE BABY SNAKES, 

 

POISONOUS INSECTS, SCORPIONS, ANTS, SPIDERS, DUST-MITES and DUST along with the ROPE.

 

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These baby snakes, poisonous insects, scorpions, ants, spiders, dust-mites and dust REPRESENT the DARK AND

DANGEROUS THOUGHTS in the mind of your WIFE.

 

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Now, with such a rope, without risking your LIFE, can you pick it up and tie the bundles of paper ?

 

Similarly,

with such a wife, can you weave a beautiful life ?

 

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NEVER.

 

You CAN NEVER.

 

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So, wherever in law, at whichever stage you are trapped,

 

first

 

WALK OUT OF THE DARK ROOM.

 

that is to say,

 

first

 

EXIT.

 

All your REVENGE, ANGER, MAN-HOOD, " DO YOU KNOW WHO I AM ? ",  " YOU BITCH ", "  I WILL TEACH YOU A LESSON ", " YOU SEE WHAT I DO ",....etc etc etc HERO DIALOGUES, forget them and send those dialogues out of your MIND.

 

first

 

EXIT.

 

To exit, if you need bail, somehow, get a bail.

 

CONSULT TEN TO TWENTY ADVOCATES.

 

READ SOME MATERIAL.

 

SEE AND DECIDE, WHAT CAN BE DONE TO STRENGTHEN YOUR CASE.

 

SELECT ONE ADVOCATE AND MOVE THE CASE.

 

CONSOLIDATE THE EVENTS of your LIFE.

 

what if you are convicted ? So, first set everything into order. All your bills, All your commitments, All your assets and liabilities,...etc etc etc CLEAN UP YOUR LIFE, assuming that in case you are CONVICTED, how to return back to a NORMAL life ?

 

_________________________________________________________________________________

 

OK...Now, go back to the WEDDING ALBUM.

 

PICK IT UP.

 

SEE YOUR WIFE, SEE HER FAMILY.

SEE ALL OF THEM.

 

NOW SEE YOUR PARENTS, Their AGEING body. See YOUR FAMILY,..etc.

 

NOW go on a MEMORY TRIP. All the incidents in your family from your childhood.

 

The vegetables, the fruits, the eggs, the meat, the festivals, the good, the bad,...etc etc etc incidents of your family, THE CONTRIBUTION OF YOUR PARENTS, BROTHERS AND SISTERS, WHO INVESTED THEIR TIME, MONEY AND ENERGY IN YOU AND YOUR EMOTIONS AND YOUR GROWTH AND DEVELOPMENT, that has today made you such a fully grown ADULT with a position in society.

 

All these, THROWN TO THE AIR, THROWN TO THE WINDS, PULLED TO THE STREET, FORCED WITH A STREET - FIGHT LIKE SLUM GOONDAS,....all these done by  ONE WOMAN.

 

JUST ONE WOMAN does all these to the YEARS AND YEARS of efforts invested in LIFE, by you and your family.

 

DECIDE WHETHER YOU EVEN WANT TO TOUCH HER AND FIGHT ?

 

NO.... JUST EXIT.

 

EXIT, my dear brothers, EXIT.

 

If you have children in the marriage, DO YOUR DUTY for the children. But simultaneously. Move on and Also do your duty towards them.

 

__________________________________________________________________________________

 

Now, see within your MIND.

 

YOU WILL NOT SEE A WIFE.

 

YOU WILL SEE THE WOMAN, as she is. The PLAIN individual.

 

Now, without any emotions attached, YOU DECIDE, whether it is WORTH FIGHTING such a cheap and WORTH-LESS individual.

 

So, adopt the ART of FIGHTING WITHOUT FIGHTING ( Famous statement by the famous Bruce Lee ) and just EXIT.

 

___________________________________________________________________________________

 

STEP OUT and even if you want to fight, by such a mind-set, by seeing that woman as a plain individual, you can STRATEGIZE better to fight and quell their evil agenda.

 

___________________________________________________________________________________

 

But, instead of fighting the WORMS, it is always BETTER to step out of the dirty GUTTER and move towards a NEW, FRESH AND BETTER LIFE.

 

Now that you have learnt from the past, AFTER SOME TIME, DEVELOP HOPE AND TAKE A NEW WIFE.

 

__________________________________________________________________________________

 

All the Best.

 

What ever happens happens for Good.


What ever has happened has happened for Good.

 

Whatever is happening is happening for Good.

 

Whatever shall happen shall happen for Good.

___________________________________________________________________________________

 

YOUR EMOTIONS AND LIFE ARE YOURS. To others, it is entertainment, gossip, lesson, money and even fun.

 

___________________________________________________________________________________

 

YOU HAVE TO LOOK AT THE LARGER PICTURE OF LIFE. YOUR LIFE.

 

YOUR NEIGHBOUR WILL NOT LOOK AT IT FOR YOUR SAKE.

 

YOU HAVE TO DO IT.

 

SO, WHATEVER YOU DO, LOOK AT THE FUTURE.



Learning

 4 Replies

Sushil Kumar Sharma (Assistant Of Company Secy)     05 November 2014

Thanks a lot sir ...


(Guest)
Nice to have peace and move on with the responsibilities towards future...

SuperHero (Manager)     19 November 2014

Thanks for your detailed and a long message what you have observed…..

Here are my Observations….

I am going through Divorce and I would like to narrate an incident in my marital life, one day she has abused me very badly, so bad that I was bitten and blood was coming. Though I have been living in a Foreign land and laws are not that biased. I didn’t call the Police. I tolerated and didn’t abuse her back. Also I tried to defend myself, but still no use.

The second time when she tried to abuse me again, I could sense the situation and ran out of the house. I am a Coward. :(

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The reason I mentioned this is no one thinks of Divorce or 498a or DV when getting married or even after getting married, and many doesn’t know what an OBTAINED A RESTRAINT ORDER is ??

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Everybody thinks we have to adjust and compromise in Life.

Also Life has to teach everyone something. When you go through this kind of situations you become stronger mentally and nevertheless one day the TRUTH will come out.

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I was wondering why I should go through all this and I guess every one wonders or curses the Fate why I go through all this?

I heard a story from Mahabharata.

During the Mahabharata War. The Great Bhishma is dying and he will be on a bed of arrows….He goes past 100 Lives and see what mistake he has done that he is lying on a bed of arrows which is pricking him and he couldn’t find anything. Then He Prays to Lord Krishna, and Lord Krishna appears and Bhishma asks Lord Krishna this question and then Lord Krishna reveals Bhishma you are the greatest, but your vision is restricted to 100 lives. Before 200 lives you were a prince and while you were hunting in a forest you took a snake and whirled it and it has fallen on a thorn bush. So that is the cause and this is the effect. You may believe it or not? It is up to each individual.

So for every cause or every action taken there will be an effect. Basically Karma theory.

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In life we see there are Women suffering who are unable to conceive(No Kids).

Babies who die after few months, Accidents happen and all the family members die in a situation.

Even today I saw a post a 23 year old son who wanted to know the process of getting divorce for their Parents who was married for 22 Years.

Father abusing and raping his own children? Oh what not we hear horrible stories.

Kids sending Parents to Old age Homes.

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So we have to always had Good thoughts, do Good things, and have a positive attitude towards life. Pray for everyone.

Behave well, live with self-respect and in dignity.

The below link is a video, we should think of Positive thoughts not Negative and how it affects our life.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GW2l6-lg49A

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India National Pledge is as follows.

India is my country. All Indians are my brothers and sisters.

I love my country and I am proud of its rich and varied heritage.

I shall always strive to be worthy of it.

I shall give my parents, teachers and all elders respect and treat everyone with courtesy.

To my country and my people, I pledge my devotion. In their well-being and prosperity alone lies my happiness.

Do we see all Indians as our Brothers and Sisters? Forget about all Indians.

In a Family 2 brothers (Blood relationship) fight for Property, Money immediately after the Father dies.

Now a day they are fighting and going to court who gets what even though the Father is alive.

Then why the hell on Earth the Wife doesn’t want Money, Alimony and Maintenance.

I am not advocating nor supporting they should demand money.

Nobody should demand dowry nor give dowry.. No Gender biased laws…

Instead of saying the word Success, I would rather say we should BALANCE our lives.

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Many are very fortunate to have Food, Clothing, Shelter and much more that that!! compared to other people in the World.

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Last but not the Least..…Pray for everyone and well-being.

We are degrading our Values day by day. Our Values are lost, Morality, Character, Discpline...

 

Thanks for reminding me..

What ever happens happens for Good.


What ever has happened has happened for Good.

 

Whatever is happening is happening for Good.

 

Whatever shall happen shall happen for Good.

 

 

1 Like

harrassed (SE)     20 November 2014

Thanks for your enlightening words!!!!


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