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trishi (manager)     30 December 2013

Procedure for getting a divorce in case of mental harassment

Please guide me about the procedure of filing a divorce on the basis of mental harassment. also, how the harassment can be proved through which evidence as this was not done publicly. But many of my family relatives are the witness of the behavior  of my husband at the time of engagement. I have some of the phone recordings available that could somehow prove that my husband has tried to make me go against my parents and completely revoke my communication with my parents, disgracing of the gift items given to them at the time of marriage by saying all as third class and putting blame of different petty things on my relatives and parents and brother. Moreover he did not consummate the marriage. We tried a lot for reconciliation. But they say that i have to limitise my expenditure to 5000 and rest of the salary should be handed over to mother in law. Also, if some day i leave the job, he will leave me too.  And makes me feel inferior by comparing me with every other girl in front by looking at those girls physical appearance. Within 20 days of marriage, he has commented on every single thing and criticized it, whether the gift items, whether the jewellery, even the iron given for clothes, the utensils, the arrangement, parents, me, bro, relatives, everything and everyone, and i have not felt even for a moment that i have married to a human who needs human relationships and feelings for marriage. Anybody could easily judge that he has married to my job and not me because he has clearly stated that i was rejected by him in photograph but he does not know how he said yes unfortunately when met me. Moreover, he has adopted the name of some guruji, that increased my level of faith in him and his family because those who believe god are above from many materialistic objects and know better how to be human and give due love and care to things. i tried my best to do all the household chores just after second day of my marriage. He did not fulfill any of the things that a wife expects her husband to do in 15 days of marriage and put everything as a condition that i must do this and that and then only he would stay, else he will walk out of marriage, threatens on everything that he would go, he is ready for all consequences. When in one incidence, we called for reconcilliation, he said to his parents that he would drive the car into the khaai, in hills, if his parents said anything to him. This make me concern with my life too. But i dont have evidence to prove everything. BUt some recordings can help me prove that atleast some serious problem is there. He tells me to consider him my god and obey him like servant. He is a well educated and highly qualified person. also hsi family.  He has sent all the furniture to his empty new house which he wants to rent out, meaning thereby that he took everything of hard earned money of my parents by saying that i will use everything that my parents will give, but unfortunately it is d reverse. He threatened me to take his parents on tour for longer durations and i shall be staying at home as of my job if i dont go by his demands. I really doubt if i am marriedto him or he has purchased me. Please help me out to go through correct procedures that could make my case strong.



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 18 Replies

Adv. Chandrasekhar (Advocate)     30 December 2013

The incidents narated above  by you in lucid style clearly demonstrates that the cruelty has been perpetrated against you.  Hence, you can file divorce petition on the ground of cruelty.  The ground can be proved by you by filing affidavit and swear those facts on oath before the court.  Further, your facts can be corroborated by your parents who have been equally denigrated on each and every possible occasion.  The court does not insist the proof beyond reasonable doubt in divorce case and the probability is enough to grant you divorce.  But do not leave the presents and money you gave to those money sucking leeches and recover every penny from them by moving appropriate application.  In the case if they acquired the property by fleecing from your salary, you can recover the same by filing Domestic Violence case.  Once you engage an advocate, you yourself check the facts thoroughly because the above query itself shows that you are quite capable to draft the petition.  Wishing you good luck.

Adv. Nikhil Seth (legal consultant (9867264707))     30 December 2013

Dear Trishi,

At the outset you file petition for dissolution of marriage on the grounds of Cruelty as you file the petition , you shall be requiring Evidence to make your case strong .Collect all possible evidence to prove mental cruelty  such as record her statements, abuses , errant behaviour all this shall help you to prove mental cruelty and help you in getting decree of divorce.

Regards,

Adv.NIKHIL SETH

Mumbai  

trishi (manager)     30 December 2013

sir,

Thanks for enthusing some positivity. The lawyer giving us consultation is telling us to go through the following steps

1. FIR to be marked through SP to SHO and then i have to go into police station to sign the FIR of a criminal case of dowry and mental andphysical harassment on the basis of which they would be arrested and then the pressure could be built for mutual . Also he told that  his family can get bail but not husband, the anticipatory bail.

The inlaws amd husband are quite clever as they did not reply of even a single question when called for reconcilliation. Moreover they have not called once when to say that they will improve their son. Instead they started putting blames and used the trick of making us distract from very point under discussion. Everybody i discussed the things with, say them as pshyco, I wanted to ask if i can add the mental unfitness of these people who want a model wife outside the house and a servant inside, moreoevr, a gulaam, and the ego of males is supreme in their family, and women are not even treated humans, without humans, and their trick of putting blame of everything on me and my family, that too, irrelevant to the point being discussed, never they are ready to even listen to our viewpoint, just is like they have said and that must be done.

Please guide what is this disease called, when people cross the limits of ego.

trishi (manager)     30 December 2013

Also, its just 2 months ago that marriage happened. And everything husband did in just the 15--20 days of marriage. What is the time that the things will take after i file an FIR against him or the way of women cell,the one that could help me getting the divorce at the earliest including the expenses, as the lawyer has already taken 50000 as one part of his fees, before even the filing of case, and now also, he is saying to wait . We have already told them telephonically that we want separation and asked them to inform us at d earliest about how they want it to happen. But its 1 week that no call has come. Moreover, before our this call, there was no call from last 20 days that they would have tried to get d things sorted out.They have shown that they are not interested in this marriage as i have refused to give my whole salary to them and have refused to break my relationship from my parents.

Adv. Nikhil Seth (legal consultant (9867264707))     30 December 2013

Dear Trsihi ,

Your case is simple just file for divorce  . As your marriage is just 2 months old lot of concillation procedure is required as due process . You file complaint in women cell and get that complaint on record.. for divorce you have to wait there is minimum period of 12 months of marriage . What you can do is file complaint against women cell and NC complaint at nearest police station. Wait for some time after completion of one year of marriage immediately file for divorce. In the mean time try to settle the matter by way of  mutual consent divorce. And stay seperate till you file for divorce.

Regards,

Adv. NIKHIL SETH

Mumbai  

Adv. Chandrasekhar (Advocate)     30 December 2013

1.  Divorce petition can be filed only one year after the solemnization of marriage.  In the exceptional hardship cases, one can file divorce within one year, but the court must satisfy about that extreme hardship. 

2.  Even in S. 498 A cases also, contrary to what your advocate is saying that even husband also will get bail.  At the most he may be kept behind bars for a week or so.  After that there will be no pressure felt by him but he will develop revenge.  If he gets a wiff of your urgency to get mutual, he will put price for giving his consent for mutual.  I will not at all recommend S.498 A.  In my view it is totally a wrong step, which should not be taken.

3.  You file domestic violence case and the case starts with conciliation.  During the conciliation talks you recover whatever stridhan is lying with themand discuss threadbare how to snap the relation.  As I said, it is very difficult to get divorce (even to file) within one year of solemnization of marriage.  But within one year, by way of annulment the relationship can be dissolved.  For that in the conciliation proceedings you both can put efforts.

4.  If your advocate has not told you about the difficulty of filing divorce petition within one year and still took Rs.50000/, he is not reliable professionally.

trishi (manager)     30 December 2013

Sir, the advocate says that if the aim is divorce, he would get it filed in the court directly and said that no need to go into women cell. Also he said that the law has changed and if we cannot live together, then there shall be no problem in filing the case as there is no chance of reunion. 

Adv. Nikhil Seth (legal consultant (9867264707))     30 December 2013

Dear Trishi ,

No harm to go in women cell for filing complaint , it shall help you in future to show that you tried to reconcile but it did not worked out . You can use as additional defense that you followed due process.

Regards,

Adv. NIKHIL SETH

Mumbai 

trishi (manager)     30 December 2013

Sir,

can i demand for his mental and medical checkup ? Also, are there methods when a medical test or mental test can be made to bring untrue results by taking some medicinesin case of medical or using cleverness in case case of mental checkup/

Adv. Chandrasekhar (Advocate)     30 December 2013

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"Also he said that the law has changed"

Which law is he talking about? As you are good enough in English, please go to any law book house and purchase "hindu marriage Act" text

for about Rs.500/ and go through S.13 (1)(i)(a) and Section 14 and you will come to know about everything you want to know about

divorce. You also get clarification that within how monay days from the date of marriage, you are entitled to file divorce petition and if you want

to file it immediately within one year, what grounds would be available to you under Section 14 to file divorce petition. You will yourself get

great clarity. Your advocate is undoubtedly obfuscating the issues. As you are asking for divorce, why is he suggesting S.498 A? What

would you achieve by filing this section? By seeing your posts, I get an impression that changing of advocate should be your first priority to

divorcing the husband. The foremost will pave the smooth way for the latter.

trishi (manager)     30 December 2013

His approach and viewpoint is of putting everything on my shoulders and proving himself the best and correct. He behaves in order to degrade me in such a manner that i loose all my confidence and made me try to live with him as his slave proving me inferior to him and everybody else. I think he is so insecure that if i proved my worth, he will loose his authority. He also dominates his parents. I really felt alone in the whole family. I went into severe depression and still unable to sleep as he is going 24 hours into my mind. I am working at a responsible position and my mistakes in job due to this will land me into bigger troubles. 

Adv. Nikhil Seth (legal consultant (9867264707))     30 December 2013

Dear Trsihi ,

Yes you can conduct psychological & psychatric  test to help you in future staing as mental disability of your husband as an additional ground for divorce.

Regards,

Adv.NIKHIL SETH

Mumbai  

trishi (manager)     30 December 2013

Sir, by the behavior and statements and the approach i have mentioned about the in laws and husband, is my doubt of medical and mental unfitness have some base, because all these things which they are doing, is done by uneducated people or boys, and not by highly qualified people, that they are unable to accept the changes in the society and behave like so. And not expecting things of older centuries to be adopted and tolerated by educated and empowered women above there self respect and keeping them in cage like situation for every single thing even when there is no such lacunae in my personality and behavior, both physically and mentally.

Adv. Nikhil Seth (legal consultant (9867264707))     30 December 2013

Dear Trsihi ,

Some people are of this nature at the best you can do is just to get rid of the at the earliest and move in life , rather than sticking to their deeds and actions.

Regards,

Adv.NIKHIL SETH

Mumbai 


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