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Temptest (Self)     26 October 2013

Wife threatening

hello experts,

 

i have been married for 4 years and have 3 year old kid. I am the only son and my mom is staying with me. My wife and her parents are money minded and are eyeing my property. 

My wife used to fight for nothing and often goes to her parents house for no reason. Initially she said that when the kid goes to school she cannot go often, but even after the kid is put in school, she even goes on school days to her parents house and stays for two days for no reason. In fact, every week we meet her parents and relatives in some function but still she makes it a point to go to her parents every week and stay 2 days.

Often quarrels happen between us and she used to abuse me. When I raise my voice , she threatens she will call the police that I am trying to kill her and many times she took the phone and tried to dial police number. She also says that she does not want my mother to stay with me. 

She says that if I do not leave my mother behind, she will often go to her parents house.  

I cannot leave my mom as she has no one except me!  Also, I am afraid to go with her to live separately, because I do not find her intention genuine. 

every day i am living in fear because I cannot even leave her because of my kid! 

Can experts suggest what can I do?



Learning

 15 Replies

Rama chary Rachakonda (Secunderabad/Highcourt practice watsapp no.9989324294 )     26 October 2013

Husband has to gain love and affection by fulfilling her requiements. Your  wife visiting her parents.Nothing to worry. Fulfil her desires and live together happily.

Laxmi Kant Joshi (Advocate )     26 October 2013

don't fight with her let her go to her parents house . you take care of your mother , behave nicely with both your wife as well as your mother , don't make any issue or ego . make life easy.

(Guest)

Headache telling it go, what a wonderful chance, you do some drama, that pls dont go, etc and then let her go, you be happy looking after your mom, like that wife also happy, for you headache is gone to its parents house.  Be happy family all in all :-)


(Guest)

@ Ramacharry ,

 

I appreciate that you are religious but it doesn't mean that you live in third world and give fake replies of over burdening of religious and God with any cause.

Here, your reply seems that if the author would not keep her wife happy in sending to her parents house then you will tell to god that "Punish him for his wrong act" lol ..

 

Every time family doesn't runs on mere sake of alleging God's wish and religious customs and traditions. Gone are the days when either of spouses were traumatized to live together till their death and that was only because they have married so and it was told that this Jodi has been made by God so live together peacefully as nothing can be done know..

 

Those who are thinking like this,I must say that they have lived their life....and had crossed such era that's why they are suggesting the immoralities here for just sake of society and GOD.

 

Thank you.


(Guest)

hello experts,

 

i have been married for 4 years and have 3 year old kid. I am the only son and my mom is staying with me. My wife and her parents are money minded and are eyeing my property. 

 

Opinion: Keep all properties on your mothers name only..

 

My wife used to fight for nothing and often goes to her parents house for no reason. Initially she said that when the kid goes to school she cannot go often, but even after the kid is put in school, she even goes on school days to her parents house and stays for two days for no reason. In fact, every week we meet her parents and relatives in some function but still she makes it a point to go to her parents every week and stay 2 days.

 

Opinion: Keep all the linkups and evidences of such cruelties and avoiding conjugal life by destroying family harmony. These will be your proves in future when she will become more nasty and will file cases.

 

Often quarrels happen between us and she used to abuse me. When I raise my voice , she threatens she will call the police that I am trying to kill her and many times she took the phone and tried to dial police number. She also says that she does not want my mother to stay with me. 

 


Opinion: Why she will call the police first, you have to be ahead of her , if she is threatening you ,then you take her headache and approach the police for same,make her malafide intentions to be known publically, Take your instance first otherwise who knows she will be another daughter of India to file false 498a and other fake cases.

 

She says that if I do not leave my mother behind, she will often go to her parents house.  

 

Opinion: Already suggested what to do.

 

I cannot leave my mom as she has no one except me!  Also, I am afraid to go with her to live separately, because I do not find her intention genuine. 

every day i am living in fear because I cannot even leave her because of my kid! 

 

Opinion: Don't ever leave your mom..bcz your mom needs you in her old age.

and she is your real power house. Dude,you have ample of grounds related to mental cruelties.

If such threats continues and her illegalities and bossgiri doesn't stop file Pvt. complaint for threats and extortion along with other relevant sections on her and MIL/FIL/BIL/SIL whoever had disturbed you and tortured you..Don't leave those gready leach b*st*rds.

 

bob (manager)     26 October 2013

Mr.Ramacharya and Mr.Joshi  are very correct in their views from one way and Even sufferer is not wrong in hies view. Its a matter of perspective.

I would like to ask Mr.Ramacharya and Mr.Joshi that , is the success of marital life the sole responisbility of the Husband ? Should the husband always compromise and try to keep his BIWI always happy, while the biwi will always remain un-considerate to her responsibilites in the matrimonial home and the queriest responsibility towards his mother.  what gives the women the right to be so stubborn !!??? do they never feel the pangs of society or family responsibility ?.  

1 Like

Northern Queen (Manager)     26 October 2013

@Sam - who are you to criticise Sufferer!  Your comments suggesting that he deserved a 498a case are completely unjustified and quite frankly it is very ignorant of you.

Every member is entitled to give their 'opinion', including myself on here. Whatever advice the queriest takes from them is his choice alone - not yours!  Congratulations that your wife has taken her 498a charge back - do you want a round of applause! - you are not out of the woods yet.

Whatever his circumstances are - Sufferer has quite rightly opined that queriest must not 'abandon his mother' - leaving her defenceless, whilst he dances to the tune of his controlling wife.  His wife knew his mother would be part of the 'deal' when she married him.  All wives want to be 'number 1', but in marriage you have to 'give and take'.  It looks like she wants to 'take' more than give'

@Queriest, whatever you decide to do, stay calm and happy. Every marriage is work in process - if you love your wife, then you have to compromise, same goes for her.  The best way forward is to 'talk' - sometimes poor communication is the root cause - not telling her you love her, or not helping out with childcare - all this leads to 'bad feelings' and her wanting to go to her own mother.

If things are broke - then you know what to do.  Keep it civil and protect yourself against 498a etc.  Keep a record of any quarrels - record when you can to support you for evidence if she makes false claims.

I hope you find peace and love.

1 Like

(Guest)

@ one of ganduest person I ever met on this forum who is full to fattu and licking ass of her 498a wife along with others.

For you such gandu ..,

fighters have already commented on you

just follow the below link where you have mentioned that you are smart because you have paid bribe of 1 lakh rupee in one month to police and lawyers against 498a wife, and NOW still licking the ass of her,.

You are a dustbin of foul and fattu husband,who gives bribe to get back her 498a wife:D

Follow below link:

https://www.lawyersclubindia.com/forum/Wife-s-wilful-harrasement-to-husband-90826.asp

 

Congrats: Again you have showed your dumb smartness, I really proud of your arsehole smartness.ha ha ha

If you have won your 498a wife then for what are doing here.....you have to be on her feet.just go and take her advise by licking her ass.Who told you to take my advise or other fighters advise.;)

so, you would be the happiest dog to again follow and licking the feet and ass of your beloved 498a wife..Go ahead I am no where to restrain you.

Best of luck for your future slave job.

 

AND NEXT TIME IF YOU BULLY YOUR DUMBNESS AND DISCOURAGE ANY VICTIMS HERE THEN GOD SURE EITHER YOU WILL DELETE YOUR ID OR WILL COME TO YOUR REAL NAME& ADDRESS,THEN SEE WHAT I WILL DO TO YOU...GET READY FOR BURST NOW..


(Guest)

It's pathetic to know that the querist had put his thread title as "Wife threatening" even though the public is not knowing the objective of the query.

and when a layman will also read his post then one could easily write for the protection of such threats where he could not left on the toes for her wicked wife and her parents.

Do any body here could clarify me.......after reading the above query as where is the conjugal duties of wife been followed by her??

she has taken her marital home like a picnic spot,where she comes and go whenever her mood says.

Even she is trying to bifurcate a mother from her son.....

 

Tell me one thing,which lady will do this??

do a good and dedicated homely wife will do this...?

No..never. A character of a women reflects by her action.

here,the action of women is controlled by the opposite party and non other than her parents.

 

And make a note.......when a girls parent/relatives interfere in her marital life then and there itself marriage becomes dead.


Here,the example all ready been laid down by @querist wife in an imminent way..so, no question of denying that "this man is not searching for peace and harmony without fear of 498a"..and this is the general perception and view of masses related to all common harassed husband of India.


Those who feel the same they would agree and those who don't they are free to leave my view and go ahead ignoring my advise.


Thanks.

sandykrish (Interested in Family LAW)     26 October 2013

Well said Sufferer I second your thoughts. @sam even despite advising you on how to handle 498a wives you have brought her back at your risk. The day will come where you would narrate your story for the same panel members seeking their suggestion. Now please keep this forum debatable from legal persay and personsl fights. We all wish you success in your married life.
1 Like

Northern Queen (Manager)     26 October 2013

Very sad to hear @Sam - claiming Sufferer requires psychiatric treatment - are you a qualified Consultant Pychiatrist to make such a claim - or are you just a lily livered ass wipe, taking a swipe at another member of this forum just because he has a different opinion to you, at the expense of real mental health sufferers.  You have made a mockery of their illness just for for a cheap dig.  

Sufferer is genuinely giving out 'free and good advice' to anyone who needs it - so you should keep your mouth shut. You have taken you 498a b*tchtroll wife back by admittedly bribing the Police and anyone else involved at the time - that makes you part of the problem, not part of the cause. Taking a swipe at others because they believe in standing up for their rights and fighting corruption will only make you look like a coward.

I am not defending Sufferer - he can do that all by himself - My argument with you is the mental health issue and for promoting taking a 498a wife back - once they do that then you are in deep sh*t in the long run. 

Good luck queriest - stand up for yourself and be a man.

1 Like

gautam (not disclosed)     26 October 2013

In any marital relationship, if the parties are mature to solve the issue, then probably they would not have come to this forum for advise or help.

Person undergoing severe strain in marital relationship are generally anxious due to the law strongly in favor of women and our legal process is too time consuming.

In such a situation, i guess @sufferer posts gives hopes, courage and advise.


However, before you jump to action emboldened by the posts in this forum, you need to a honest evaluation of yourself, spouse and the mess you are in.

Generally, the seeker will give only their side of the story and will get advise on the basis of the facts put forth by them.

What is the harm of taking preventive steps, but don't get overtly optimistic on legal process in India

 

1 Like

Girish (Senior Manager Operations)     27 October 2013

I think you & your wife needs counselling. If possible try your best to save the marriage as you have a child already.

1) If your wife is asking you to apart from your mother PLEASE COLLECT/CREATE THE EVIDENCE for the same. Video Recording with Camera PEN Gadget, etc.

2) If your wife is threatening you of filing false cases/complaints to Police then PLEASE COLLECT/CREATE THE EVIDENCE for the same. Video Recording / Over a phone call Audio Recording, etc.

These secondary proofs will help you in future if your wife turns into a 498a, DV wife or even in Divorce cases.

Once you will have evidences you can lodge complaints at Police Stations easily ahead of your wife.

Be Truthful to self! If you are on the side of Truth believe me victory will be yours! Truth Alone Triumphs!!!

Temptest (Self)     27 October 2013

Dear all,

thanks for all your comments.

i have been trying to keep the marriage live for the past one year because of my kid. 

Now, i decided to get separated as she is trying to frame me in false cases.  However, I do not want Divorce.

Can some suggest what precaution should be taken before initilaizing the process of judicial separation?

She has gone to her parents house now, should i tell her that she can live at her parents place permanently?