498aWinner (NA) 22 October 2013

Mental cruelty by wife

Hello,

My friend is in deep trouble due to an arranged marriage and need your advice.

He got engaged to this girl in Nov 2012 & marriage was fixed for May 2013. By Dec 2012 , he found out that things were not working out between the both & there was no compatability between each other and decided to stop the marriage & informed about this to the Girl, her parents & his parents as well. He was not even 1% interested to get married to this girl. However, no one listened to him and said things would work after marriage & threatened him of the consequences if something happens to girls mom (Heart Patient) if we stop the marriage. There were many meetings between the elders of the family and nobody agreed to stop the marriage. Even the girl dint wanted to give up as the previous 15 proposals had rejected her. She is very rigid, selfish, boozes and parties with her friends till late night, she made sure she got good openion from my friends parents through all the drama. Once she locked herself in a room and threatened him that she will commit suicide unless he marries her. They never spoke to each other for 1 & half month before marriage.

Finally he got married to her in May2013 as per Hindu Religious ceremony and it was not registered and they started living together from July 2013. He had rented a good house and bought all household things however he was not talking to her much and was not taking anywhere as he was mentally disturbed and was not able to accept her. Girl is not working and stayed back at home & made sure things working her way by infoming her side of the story to all family members about the problem & made big issue out of it and fight on weekends and go to her parents house. She left my friends house in Sept and approached some Womens Association and my friend got calls from them and even they abused him for no reason. Later she filed false complaint in the station that he is treating her like labour at home and is having illegal affairs. It was not an FIR however the police came to my friends Office to ask him to come to station to settle things and it was an embarassment for him. he went to the station and they asked him to take her wife back home and got some written statements from him that he wont trouble her again and they can take action on him if anything goes wrong from his side. He took her back home due to their force in Sept end and they are staying together now.

My questions are:

1. As its not one year still, can my friend apply for divorce by any means

2. Getting abusive calls from Association people and Police coming to workplace, does this amount to mental cruelty for my friend? Can he file a case now?

3. Even though no dowary has been taken and the girl was always treated in the right manner, Girl can file any false complaints on him. So what is the best way to deal with in this situation.

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5 Replies

Senthil kumar (Recruitment) 22 October 2013

Hi Friend,

it is somewhat similar to my situation.

I judged these consequences and wrote a intimation of false dowry case to the commisioner.

As expected my cruel wife along with my father in law went and registered as dowry harrassment.

Since i have shown my papers , i got escaped.Moreover the counselling session will dig a lot whether there is a chance of asking dowry.

If in case you have to relieve from her, first of all you should not live together because you cannot apply for divorce if you are staying in the same house.

Create some allegations or find some mistakes and report to police station.

Allegation should be handled with allegations only.

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T. Kalaiselvan, Advocate (Advocate) 22 October 2013

While seeking answer to the queries here, the facts are to be disclosed so that correct opinion/advice can be given. In this case,whether the boy had an extra marital affairs with somebody as alleged by his wife?, Whether he ill-treated her with cruel and intolerable behavior? What was the reason to start the marital life belatedly i.e., after two months of their marriage? If the allegations by the boy that the girl had all bad habits and that were known to the boy before marriage itself, he could have stood stubborn against the marriage, he does not have to sympathise the girl's mother's heart disease nor he should have worried about the girl's suicide drama, whether the boy was not matured enough to take a firm decision about his life and the future thereon? Now the problem is whether he can apply for divorce within 1 year of the marriage, he can very well do it but before that he has to obtain permission from the court on an application u/s 14(1) of the HM Act,which will seek the respondent's objection, if any and shall be decided after that. If he is getting abusive/threatening calls from Association or any one else, he can lodge a complaint against the erring people before the local police station(preferably cyber crime wing) with evidence. Next whether she can file dowry harassment case, if she feels that it is a weapon to be used against you she may proceed with that that also, I think by now her misguiders would have flung into action by mis-advicing her on all the probabilities against you, hence be alert. Instead why dont you try for reconciliation through marriage counsellors and arrange for a continuation of the broken marriage/married life. Always try to save the marriage with best and sincere efforts, only after all your efforts fail, go for next step as per the circumstances.

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498aWinner (NA) 22 October 2013

There was no extra marital affair as alleged by wife. They had illegally tracked the cellphone of my friend and found out few messages been sent out to one of his friend who is a girl. They treated it as an extra marital affair. This is the fact. There was no way she was ill-treated. It was started after 2 months as he was not ready to live with her after all the mental trauma that was caused to him.

ashoksrivastava (scientist) 22 October 2013

Originally posted by : In need of help

@ querist ask your friend to have a frank discussion with his wife as to what she wants from him and where does she want to take this marriage. See if something constructive comes out of it

If possible they should part ways peacefully.via MCD .Generally due to ego we delay this essential first step till things go out of hand.

regards ASHOK

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Northern Queen (Manager) 22 October 2013

@querist - i really sympathise and empathise about your friend's dilemma.

I am not a Lawyer, nor do i profess to be one, but i'm certain if your friend goes for a divorce now, then it will inevitably bring on IPC 498a charge.

I have seen how this act is being used by dishonest Indian women more and more now. 15 rejected proposals should have warned your friend that this woman was trouble - she and her family had a higher agenda - namely your friends assets, money and the shirt off his back - oh and his soul too - these trolls won't stop at anything once you put a ring on their fingers.

My advice - and it is only advice - tell your friend to record any rows they have - hopefully she will confess about false dowry allegations etc on them. Tell him to collect any evidence of his expenditure, her 'drinking problem' and anything that will prove his innocence in this marriage. Once he has enough evidence then he should leave her and file for divorce stating 'mental cruelty'. She will file a FIR without a doubt, but being forearmed is being forewarned and he will have bullets to fire to smash her false accusations.

Good luck to him and i hope he finds love and peace with another person - there still are some lovely Indian ladies out there who have had a good upbringing and believe in the sanctity of marriage.

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