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Sarvana Shekar (ssr2)     01 March 2013

Seeking divorce

Hi,

in Brief; my family and me are victim of 498a & DV act, i applied for divorce the wife did not appear in family court and the divorce was rejected. I appealed in High court and she appeared after i paid legal charges as per direction from court. The court dismissed my petition ordering " the respondent shall with draw all the criminal cases against the husband and join him the parent and brothers of the respondant shall not interfior in the marital life' Now they have with drawn DV act and trying to withdraw 498a and join me back, 

 

I dont want to take her back and need a divorce without appealing to Supreme court.

Please advise me.:(



Learning

 13 Replies

Alok Tholiya (self employed)     01 March 2013

She has done rethinking and reviewing. Forget past for a moment and review. 

  1. Is she really that bad or it is ur hatred?
  2. Is it possible to get a 2nd wife who will be better then her?
  3. Think as 3 rd person if she was wrong in filing the said cases? Be honest by keeping a hand on head of  ur dearest family person. If I have really abused my wife, taunted her for not getting enough , or similar incidences by my family then my heart will say she has legal right to go against me in court and that is the only thing a law abiding citizens can do. Why break law so any one goes against us to court??
  4. All married couples have fight and sooner or later they bury the hatchets. And at later age they realise that togatherness is a bliss and singlehood, second partner may not be as as good as was thought. 
  5. There r several ways to improve her and to make her compitiable. We have to put in efforts to improve our staff, children etc like wise we have to seriously work on improving our partner and so also ourselves. 

I pray to god ( which I do not as a daily ritual )  from my heart for you and wish that you rebuild your falling home by putting in efforts . Any family member from your side thrying to bulldoz your home needs correction. 

Yours is the first mail which I saw this morning and there is no better way to worship god then helping save a married life of some one and my sincere appeal to give a pause, review , things are not that bad . repair and rnew relations. 

2 Like

Shyam (Field Supervisor)     01 March 2013

It is every human beings fundamental right to choose his/her own way to live the life. Relationship  between husband and wife is not a 'legal' matter, it is an 'emotional' matter. A judge's order or a lawyer's advice can not, and SHOULD NOT make any change in our choice of how we want to live this life. Divorce in India is seen thr mediaval mindset, and in most of the case, either husband or wife take advantage of this judicial lethargy to let people live their own life. Result is divorce cases drawn over 5-10 years! Unthinkable in modern world!!

Anybody who thinks he/she can not live together any more, they should go for divorce, and this is the most sensible and healthy thing to do. Now Supreme Court and Govt also taking steps to make things easier for the broken families. Best way to prepare for a legal battle is to gather evidence, consult a good lawyer and pursue it to the end. 

1 Like

(Guest)
Originally posted by : Sarvana Shekar

Hi,

in Brief; my family and me are victim of 498a & DV act, i applied for divorce the wife did not appear in family court and the divorce was rejected. I appealed in High court and she appeared after i paid legal charges as per direction from court. The court dismissed my petition ordering " the respondent shall with draw all the criminal cases against the husband and join him the parent and brothers of the respondant shall not interfior in the marital life' Now they have with drawn DV act and trying to withdraw 498a and join me back, 

 

I dont want to take her back and need a divorce without appealing to Supreme court.

Please advise me.:(

 

Kudos there to your wife.


Dont want to live with her, dont want to accept her back?


Just file fresh divorce petition, putting all those cases that she filed against you, 498a, DV etc and that will make the base for mental cruelty. That'd do it.

Ranee....... (NA)     01 March 2013

, i applied for divorce the wife did not appear in family court and the divorce was rejected.

 

 

if she did not appeared you should be awareded with exparte divorce, then why it was rejected?

1 Like

Msk-need -nuetral- laws (self)     01 March 2013

Sarvana,

You need to tell the forum the ground on which you filed divorce and why court had rejected it?

Wait till their withdrawal, and consult a good lawyer and frame a better divorce pettion, if rejected, no other go, you need to move to SC

But in any case, no matter or what, one should not take back 498a wife again, she will again do the very same.

1 Like

Sarvana Shekar (ssr2)     02 March 2013

Thank you for all the advice, I honestly did not belive i would get such quick response so did not mention a lot of things,

@Alok Tholiya, Thank you for the suggestion, this is way beyond reconsidering. i have not done anything wrong directly or indirectly which i can think of for her to file a cases against me, She had been torturing me for materialistic things from very begining of the marriage. Before i could think of divorce there has been atleast 25 times were she has left and joined her parential home and after long sessions of talks from elders and relatives from both end, the in-laws comes to conclusion that its thier mistake and i have change all over again and take her back.  This did not make any changes to her or her family members. They continued harrassing me. The previous to last time she left to her home her brothers called me and my father at the same time and threatned of life and fulthy words about mid night. the next day elders from my and her family gatherd for a talk, In the conversation i proved who is at falt and they admitted thier mistakes. I decided to take her back with no interference from her family atleast for nexxt 6months, mean while with kind of mind set i had i filed a divorce and forgot about it, when she was staying with me they received summons from court, i explained the situation and met my advocate to withdraw the pettion, Then the judge in family court retiered and i did not take any action. The situation changed again the frequent visit of the family members created troublw again and she left. This time she filed a 498a case against me on my Birthday on a friday evening followed by 2nd saturday and sunday. luckily we were not around and with lot of help from friend we managed to escape the arrest and got a bail in time. Then i continued my divorce under the grounds of cruelity. we submited teh FIR and DV act in evidenace and the divorce was dismissed stating the face of the complaint states the cruelity is against the wife.

The FIR she filed against me states i used to drink and thrash her every day and we assolted thier family members and chased her out of the home. with moto of demanding dowry.

She filed DV stating she was not given food and clothing demanding 20k p/m with 25lks compansasion.

we also took help of mediation and they demanded one build house for her self and one for her mom or 50lakhs in cash. only to with draw the case not for divorce.

There is lot of things i have missed one point i just remembered. When the matter was taken up to high court, the first judge who took up the matter wanted me to spend some time with her and then meet him in his cabin ( dual judge ) when i spoke to her, she did not regrit for the mistakes nor she had the goodness to give a second thought.

 

i am sure she will not change. reconsidering the situation is only going to make my life miserable or even end of me.

 

Please advise 

 

Thanks in Advance.

Sarvana Shekar (ssr2)     02 March 2013

Thank you for all the advice, I honestly did not belive i would get such quick response so did not mention a lot of things,

@Alok Tholiya, Thank you for the suggestion, this is way beyond reconsidering. i have not done anything wrong directly or indirectly which i can think of for her to file a cases against me, She had been torturing me for materialistic things from very begining of the marriage. Before i could think of divorce there has been atleast 25 times were she has left and joined her parential home and after long sessions of talks from elders and relatives from both end, the in-laws comes to conclusion that its thier mistake and i have change all over again and take her back.  This did not make any changes to her or her family members. They continued harrassing me. The previous to last time she left to her home her brothers called me and my father at the same time and threatned of life and fulthy words about mid night. the next day elders from my and her family gatherd for a talk, In the conversation i proved who is at falt and they admitted thier mistakes. I decided to take her back with no interference from her family atleast for nexxt 6months, mean while with kind of mind set i had i filed a divorce and forgot about it, when she was staying with me they received summons from court, i explained the situation and met my advocate to withdraw the pettion, Then the judge in family court retiered and i did not take any action. The situation changed again the frequent visit of the family members created troublw again and she left. This time she filed a 498a case against me on my Birthday on a friday evening followed by 2nd saturday and sunday. luckily we were not around and with lot of help from friend we managed to escape the arrest and got a bail in time. Then i continued my divorce under the grounds of cruelity. we submited teh FIR and DV act in evidenace and the divorce was dismissed stating the face of the complaint states the cruelity is against the wife.

The FIR she filed against me states i used to drink and thrash her every day and we assolted thier family members and chased her out of the home. with moto of demanding dowry.

She filed DV stating she was not given food and clothing demanding 20k p/m with 25lks compansasion.

we also took help of mediation and they demanded one build house for her self and one for her mom or 50lakhs in cash. only to with draw the case not for divorce.

There is lot of things i have missed one point i just remembered. When the matter was taken up to high court, the first judge who took up the matter wanted me to spend some time with her and then meet him in his cabin ( dual judge ) when i spoke to her, she did not regrit for the mistakes nor she had the goodness to give a second thought.

 

i am sure she will not change. reconsidering the situation is only going to make my life miserable or even end of me.

 

Please advise 

 

Thanks in Advance.

Msk-need -nuetral- laws (self)     02 March 2013

Saravana,

This is clear case of extortion and they use laws to threaten you. Believe us , law is not such blind folded to fear these people,  Your decision od standing against this lady is justifiable enough. Can you PM your scan copy of pettition if you are interested.

regards


1 Like

Sarvana Shekar (ssr2)     05 March 2013

Thank you for understanding my situation,

I don't have a scanner as of now but i will defenatly do that, however i wanted to know what is the best way for me to get through this current situation.

once they withdraw the 498a she is going to comback and threaten to live togather.

Now since there has been supperation from june,2011 if i could wait till june/july 2013 i will get a grounds for deserssion.

If i am filling a new pettition for divorce then i may not get this grounds.

The next hearing for 498a is 23rd of this month.

I have also apllied for a discharge pettion to my parents which is in orgument stage.

Please advise

Sarvana Shekar (ssr2)     05 March 2013

Also a contact number or a personal appointment will be good enough,

i stay in Bangalore

hamsa (Computer Operator)     06 March 2013

Hi Saravan ji,

Please contact Advocate Mr. Nagaraj - 9880036333 , Bangalore he defnetly solve your problem. 

1 Like

Sarvana Shekar (ssr2)     07 March 2013

 

i wanted to know what is the best way for me to get through this current situation.

once they withdraw the 498a she is going to comback and threaten to live togather.

Now since there has been supperation from june,2011 if i could wait till june/july 2013 i will get a grounds for deserssion.

If i am filling a new pettition for divorce then i may not get this grounds.

The next hearing for 498a is 23rd of this month.

I have also apllied for a discharge pettion to my parents which is in orgument stage.

Please advise

Sarvana Shekar (ssr2)     02 April 2013

Hi Experts,

Please help me with some suggestions,

Stated earlier in my query, could some one tell me as per the orders from high court if all the criminal cases is withdrawn then is there any implication on me to take her back?

the order does not give any directions to me! however i am bothered with after effects.

what are the other possible things she might do? if i dont take her back ( after filing a false 498a and DV )

Please help me with some advise.

 

Thanks in Advance


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