Why 498a?

Girl’s side normally files 498a for two reasons:

1. If they are on wrong side and do not want divorce or maybe they just want to teach lesson because they feel injustice has been done to them.

2. To put other side in pressure and extort as much money as they can.

As in your case, girl doesn't wish to come and live with you, so better wait and don’t react.

Show that her absence is not making any difference to you. Keep calm.

Buy spy camera and record whatever you can.

*I am not a lawyer

Mostly now a days girl side try to marry their daughter with rich person., they know their daughters attitude and every thing, but they also know if tomorrow anything went wrong they can filr 498a and collect good amount form husband for their daughter.

hmm, practical approach, i agreed..

Discussions to reconcile the matter failed.  What remains after that is grudge, anger and illwill against each other.  They say to you, "If you meet our expectations, we will be kind to you.  These are our expectations.".  You say no to it.  So they get angry with you, "how dare he doesn't do what we ask him to do?".  And you file for divorce, they feel they are letting you go cheaply despite you being on wrong side.  "Galti uskaa hai, divorce maange to dedenge kyaa?"

So, they file S.498A.  If you have not taken anything from them in terms of dowry the possibility of filing S.498A is less.  If you are feeling, "Haji!  Dowry diyaa to kyaa?  Agar ladki ko shaadi karke ghar bithaanaa hai to shaadi kyon kiyaa...?  Why should we pay back that dowry amount....they should pay that amount for unnecessarily dragging us into this relationship and disturbing us.".....then they feel justified in filing S.498A. "Due to some reason the marriage has not worked, that does not mean they do not pay back the amounts they have taken in the form of dowy?"....they carry these thoughts. 

People coming to this forum do not share the real hitch. But if what you say is right then if the girl is not ready marrying that girl to you is their mistake.  If they are saying girl is not ready for marriage, hence we do not want to send her to you, then you have a right to ask them to cooperate to get the marriage nullified.  And it is their duty to accept that proposal.  They should even say sorry to you if they are respectable people for causing such huge inconvenience to you.

But nobody knows, why they are asking for money when mistake lies with them. 

Bze. now that is the fixed cost set by her natal home to pay by him for "that muh dekhai aka seeing a laddu for the first time" (i.e. seeing a) virgin bride within 4 corners of bedroom on the eve of couples first night. Now whether the laddu was consummated or remained non-consummated, now the natal home is not bothered to socially somehow accept but by just seeing virginity of a bride a price has to be set now is what carries forward into natal homes ego not to amicably settle the case. otherwise the facts has nothing else not to know why such social ego comes on the way for such clear settlement of casses.


Apart from above actual inner psychosis making rounds of the facts before us I agree to @ Big Iron practical advise.

Dear Sir,

It is 100% true that girl use to say she was not ready for marriage and girl did not come to my house even for a day. Her parents also know this. Her parents also tried their best to send her to my house but she was very adament to them also ( still i don't know her real reason).

Our joint meeting failed because

1) their parents were adding all the amount they have spent on marriage but they were not considering what we have spent on marriage.

2) My relatives have also given huge amount of jewellery to the girl and they are telling that they will not return that as that is stridhan?

These are the two reasons because of what our discussion failed.

Is it right from our part to demand the jewellary that what our relatives have given to the girl. We also told that what ever they have given to the boy will be returned but that is very less in comparison to what jewellery my relatives have given.

Can we send an e-mail to them stating that kindly come for talks and all your genuine demands will be met. plz advice.

1. Their parents were adding all the amount they have spent on marriage but they were not considering what we have spent on marriage.
Take: Amount spent on marriage reception / wedding / honeymoon by either side are not supposed to be returned to either side(s) nor even considered as legal binding if in future any criminal case goes to floor of the Court except some ld. PO making it as an personal issue seeing a abalas tears at the time of bail and force you / your side to return the same as part of bail granting exercise then what shall you / your side will do – think now !


2. My relatives have also given huge amount of jewellery to the girl and they are telling that they will not return that as that is stridhan?
Take: They are right on their Johnny Walker label consumed at reception nite now turning into full bottle claim - any present before, at the time and during a live marriage given as present / gift by either side to the marriage till a marriage is dissolved is her stridhan. PERIOD


See from your query what you / your side now have to decide is how quickly without much criminal / civil damages to you / your side you want to get out from all these i.e. riddance once for all from ! What is happening is illegal no doubt it, the more you ask and get clarified everyone will say the same but what is required smartly is to see if you / your side want to contest till few more years some criminal case without even seeing the laddo and or want quick exit with a resolve to do next time pakka work by following Dowry Rules as laid doen in DP Act re. Maintaining list of gifts by bride – groom with signature of witness from both sides!

Conjoint reading replies to above two question of yours shows how legal terrorism takes place in contemporary India.