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Preetam Kumar (customer care)     06 December 2011

Harrsed by wife

Hi,

Its been more than 7 months i am married, after marriage i noticed that my wife is not interested in me i dont know what was the reason she was not paying any attention in me .when i asked her she told me that she want to go to her mother house and she missed them very much.Then i  told her that it is not possible for a girl to live at their parents house now you are married and you should take care of my family.After one month of marriage she started  creating problems in cooking and doing other house work.She started misbehaving with my parents and disobey me also.she started lying  to her parents that she is not well at my home & facing a lot of problems,after that her parents also started to threatned my family that we are keeping her like a servant .I also noticed that after making call she delete the numbers that make me to think that she might have any affair before marriage.I asked her many times but she didnt tell me clearly why she delete the nos. after call.When i fedup with her daily problems i asked her parents to come to my house to complaint about her .She threatned me that (mere maa pitaji se kutch mat kahna nahi to mai attm-hattya kar lungi) she fears a lot with her father. but i told every thing to her parrents .Her father is a very aggresive man he denied every thing and told me that(aap meri bati ko badnam kar rahe hai meri beti ne kutch galat nahi kiya hai).There was a heating argument b/w me and her father,and he told me that they wanted to  to take her with them i denied.I asked my wife (agar tum is saadi k ristey ko manti ho aur meri patni ho to meri izzazat k bina mere ghar se kadam nahi nikalogi) but she went  with her parents without  my family consent.After few days her father phoned me and threatned me that we had kept his daughter under pressure and he will file case against me and my family.He also abused me and my father.I knew that she has misguided her parents against me and my family .But i dont know how can i prove  her parents that she is lying and she dont want to live with me, every time she disgraced my family.

Now after one and a half months her parents want me to take her back to my house but i am fearing that again she will creat the same problem  and this time she might prepare false case against me and my family for dowry or any other women cruelty case beacuse she dont  want to live in family boundation.She might also try for sucide as she warned me earlier .Now i am very confused and dissapointed i dont want my parents to suffer any more and dont want  any stigma like this on my family.I do have a sucide not written by her ,and some phone calls recordings in which she has confessed that she has created all these problems &  misunderstandings b/w the two families.

Please help me how can i deal with this situation.

IS there any provision that i can bound her(my wife) or take any any written confirmation from my wife and her parents  that she will not creat any problem at my home and will live peace-fully and take care of my parents.

If it is possible please let me know from where and how i.e from court ,police station or from womencell.

Please help me..........



Learning

 25 Replies

Shonee Kapoor (Legal Evangelist - TRIPAKSHA)     06 December 2011

Were you not a lil harsh with your wife.

 

A newly wed can miss her family and should be allowed to meet her family periodically.

 

 

Regards,

 

Shonee Kapoor

harassed.by.498a@gmail.com

1 Like

Legal Fighter (Advocate)     06 December 2011

no such relief can be prayed before the court.

SSng Aulakh (Senior Ship Master)     06 December 2011

Try to win heart of your wife, treat her as a member of your family and respect her feelings. Your parents and other family members especially the female members to also ensure this.

But, Remember you are the main person to save guard her intrests in the house  and make her to feel at her home.

chandra mohan (power)     06 December 2011

if you have any doubt about the calls made from mobile, you can ask service provider they will charge 50 rs per month for this.

nothing serious i think, she may be afraid of you to talking wid her parents. give her little bit freedom and dont be possessive.

try to manage things amicably otherwise your family/ married life will be in problem.

Rajeev Kumar (Lawyer/Advocate)     06 December 2011

You should file an RCR with all evidences and the narrated story. There you can make a bond from her. So let us consult an advocate
1 Like

raj malhotra (M.D)     06 December 2011

buddy........whtever way u go ..move id utmost precaution..

Shantanu Wavhal (Worker)     06 December 2011

meri izzazat k bina mere ghar se kadam nahi nikalogi

boy ! r u aware of DV act provisions ?

i am fearing that again she will creat the same problem

be careful

she might prepare false case against me

quite possible

IS there any provision that i can bound her(my wife) or take any any written confirmation from my wife

dont even say so ! it may amount to cruelty to her (as per law)


(Guest)

Whether you are good or harsh it does not matter..

My sweet wife, in 8 months of marriage..flew home 4 times (she had not travelled in an Airplane before marriage), was given a cell phone (I paid the bill) talked home for at an average 2 hours a day, went with me to all the places I went to for my office tour..completely enjoyed in all the places...

Used to go for driving..with me every week end...there was not a single mall in the city she did not visit or not a single good restaurant she did not eat in ...

all these in 8 months of marrige...

Result  - 498A, DV

It does not matter whether you are good or harsh..nothing works..

Gautam

Shantanu Wavhal (Worker)     06 December 2011

@ gautam same story here yaar !

Jogi Bhatia (Employer)     06 December 2011

Preetam - really sad to know about your situation. On the basis of information provided by you it is clear that:

A) That girl DOES NOT love or like you.
B) She might be having an affair with somebody else and she is afraid to tell this to her parents.
C) Her father will NOT believe you as she had told a different story to them.
D) She WILL NOT like to come back to your house but her parents are forcing her.

In a nutshell, she is not the right girl for you and your family.

Being a husband it was your duty to maintain order and discipline in your married life. A wife has to behave properly and respect your parents. Also it is her responsibility to accept your family values and ways of living.

Simply ignore her father and don't involve in any heated conversations. Just relax and wait for them to take any action.

Let her stay at her house. It was she who moved out of this marriage, not you. So you do not have any fault.

Forget about her, ask your parents to start finding another girl and bring peace to your life.

PS: DO NOT file FOR DIVORCE no matter what your lawyer tells you.

Best regards,

JOGI
 

subhash verma (Sr. Accountant)     07 December 2011

@ gautam

ur absolutly right. it dos't matter that how u had behaved good or bad.

i m also facing all misfate of baised law.

1 Like

subhash verma (Sr. Accountant)     07 December 2011

Originally posted by : Zeeshan
"




I have to say,"Gareeb ghar ki ladki layoge to ankhe phat jaati hain, samajhti hai baap ka maal hai, loot lo ."
zeeshan ye sab 498a ki kirpa hai..jo ye loteri ban rahi...
 
"

Preetam Kumar (customer care)     08 December 2011

 

 thank you so much for the reply ...

 

as u said she might missing her family but can any girl say to her husband with in one week that she want to go her parents house.It means she doesnt like me and my family and the same thing i observed by her nature and attitude.she always wanted to dominant on me.i have given her freedom to speak to her parents on phone but she misused that freedom by calling some one else and deleting that no why she forced me not to tell these things to her parents....

 

and why she misguided her parents about me and my family ...and once she went to her parents house why she blamed me and my family to keep her under pressure.....and threatened us to file a case....

 

she donot have any regret ...for his deeds ..now she is saying that she will come and live at my house .....doesnt matter i take her or not.

 

right now God saved us that she went to her parents without any stigma on my family but if i again take her to my home she can do any thing...because she donot want to do any house work even some time she denied  for cooking..if i do not fulfill her conditions and donot work according to her.she might blackmail me and my family under 498 or dowry or cruelty act ...as i knew her she can even hurt her self to blame my family ....this is my main concern ...and at that time no body will believe me and my family.........my tension is still same,it is fact that i love her very much but  i am not able to trust her ...she has lost my confidence...my intention is not to defame her or divorce her...i would have accept her without any hesitation if i would be alone ... but i cant take risk for my parents at this stage ..........please help and suggest me  what to do......i cant imagine my rest of life with her....she has ruined me like this.. 

cm jain sir (ccc)     08 December 2011


I think the present generation are living in some other world.

we accept advancement of the society but it should not be at the cost of anybodies personal family life.

Now a days many of the wives/girls are taking the society in some other direction leaving the family value and the great traditional culture at bay.

The result is matrimonial discord which is supported by our biased legal system.


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