abdul (MD) 28 December 2012

Where

Dear Learned Counsel and Other Esteemed Members of this Forum,

I'm from Chennai and my wife from nagpur, 8 years of blissful marriage is on the brink of collapse thanks to my wife's highly inflated ego, obstinacy and her familys refusal to arbitrate.

she left on 24th september uninformed and left behind my two kids girl 8 and boy 3, later she said that she needs time to recuperate and promised to come back after a month and took the kids with her, we relented wanting her to come back and not being rigid which may make things worser.

but it was a ploy, 3 months has passed and now she refuses to come and part with the kids, so far only a divorce notice was sent from her lawyer and no further developments.

now we want to go to her place and bring back the kids if not her, which may instigate her to proceeed further with dowry harrsement or domestic violence cases 498 i assume.

i have few questions and would be grateful if someone guides me

1) where shall she complaint Nagpur police or chennai police, we got married in chennai and lived in chennai alone for past 8 years

2) what happens after she complains? how can i protect myself & my family?

3) does the court come in the picture later or before the complaint?

4) legally i commit no crime in bringing back my kids?

5) i want to file rcr, is it advisable?

6) she took jewelry worth 20 lakhs belonging to herself, my mother and my brother who is to get married next month, how can i get it back? this was taken from the bank locker with joint custody?

7) not a penny rcvd so far in cash or kind from her family?

i sincerely want my wife back, what do i do?

i posted earlier in this forum but did not garner much response.

eagerly awaiting your wise advises

regards,

abdul

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7 Replies

Tajobsindia (Senior Partner ) 29 December 2012

Originally posted by : abdul
	XXX where shall she complaint Nagpur police or chennai police, we got married in chennai and lived in chennai alone for past 8 years Take: Chennai where most of the incidences post marriage happened. But police read with her local men and agent with whom she will get briefing will file the complaint case in Nagpur! What happens after she complains? how can i protect myself & my family? Take: Police or Women's Cell will request you to come and give statement or for reconciliation. For pre-498a read link https://www.498a.org/pre498a.htm and other links in the referred to website and Chennai has a strong SIF team which is a Men's Rights NGO for free advise and bonding for victims of dowry laws. Google and join them locally for timely guidance and also prepare search for an advocate via reference, does the court come in the picture later or before the complaint? Take: If Police makes FIR then Courts comes into picture as soon as she files Complaint. If Police does not make FIR then girl's side have option to directly approach Magistrate Court with Complaint for further proceedings. legally i commit no crime in bringing back my kids? Take: The children are as much as yours as hers. As per facts you have every right to peacefully bring the children back to Chennai as they can continue with their studies post X-Mas/N’Year vacations. Do not force but take neutral elder witnesses with you while attempting to bring back kids. It is a emotional challenge and first step in your legal education and you should attempt before the vacation ends! i want to file rcr, is it advisable? Take: RCR is advisable on two facts; one if you really don’t wish to break matrimonial life with her and believe in continuing family harmony for the sake of children. Second to showcause to Court that you din’t refuse her company and you are ready to keep her and failing which she cannot claim maintenance in S. 125 CrPC but other laws she can still. Take your own call on RCR. she took jewelry worth 20 lakhs belonging to herself, my mother and my brother who is to get married next month, how can i get it back? this was taken from the bank locker with joint custody? Take: File a police report in simple wordings "that my wife without my consent has taken your children to natal home on such and such date whose address is such and such and along with such and such jewelry list out of which these and these belongs to her and these and these were her stridhan and these and these are specifically made for my brother Sh. XYZ forthcoming marriage, kindly help me bringing back my wife and children along with jewelry so that matrimony is saved and my brother's marriage also takes place where he can give to his wife the jewelry that my wife took from such and such addressed bank locker." Take stamp / signed copy of this simple application and keep it safely, it will help you greatly. After submitting this Application don’t operate the bank locker at all till some future case on cards. not a penny rcvd so far in cash or kind from her family? Take: Noted facts. But when she will file a complaint the empty Johnny Walker bottle that guests drank on reception night will be now included in great stridhan list / dowry list so it will your time to say the same before Authorities with 'proof' so prepare grounds accordingly of your innocence. i sincerely want my wife back, what do i do? Take: Then file RCR and stick to RCR till end come what may. This is a paper decree and no act of even God can unite two unwilling spouses if one does not want to come back but nevertheless Legislatures have included RCR Section for trying out. Secondly once you or she files a case reconciliation / mediation of Court will take place there also you can say about bringing her back or I love her and then see if it ever works in your case. i posted earlier in this forum but did not garner much response. Take: If you did not or did receive response then the next step was to hire an advocate locally via reference and could have sought Chamber responses by meeting his legal fees! No big deal I see in this statement of yours!.

abdul (MD) 29 December 2012

Dear Tajobs Sir,

Thanks for taking your time and replying to my query, i need some more advice on the advice you gave already

Take 1 : But police read with her local men and agent with whom she will get briefing will file the complaint case in Nagpur! (i could not understand this)

1) where can be the jurisdiction Nagpur or Chennai? my wife now has taken a job in Oxfam Nagpur and put my children in school and day care with not birth certificate or other supporting documents.

2) can she succeed in getting the jurisdiction in Nagpur?

3) will i or any family member of mine be arrested, should we take an AB?

4) there has not been any stridhan or any reception, ours was a love marriage, she being a christian who embraced islam willingly and the marriage solemned in Chennai and it was a very simple affair, no feast, nothing. not a penny i stress i have ever recieved from my wife or from her side, in fact i have also put great emphasis on not taking anything from my in laws and i'm very proud of what i did. whatever we own this day is all what i earned and bought for ourselves.

5) its so true that you cannot force someone to love you or live with you, anyways that is what i want, my wife and my kids back and for that reason alone i have suffered great insults from my in laws in my attempts of reconcilation and my family too have been embrassed, but we have brushed that aside as now my sole aim is the future of our children and i'm willing to tolerate everything for their secure future.

i thank you again, the prime reason why we have not done anything legally is that we beilieve any involvement from judicial or police may aggrevate the issue and may the relationship may detoriate further, anyways i think its time to get some action done.

thank you Sir, you have won many admirers here and i'm one of them

regards

abdul

Tajobsindia (Senior Partner ) 29 December 2012

Originally posted by : abdul

XXX

Take 1: But police read with her local men and agent with whom she will get briefing will file the complaint case in Nagpur! (i could not understand this)

Reply: It is mentioned in simple English reason being had it been so simple she would not have left you moreover filing is one thing and contesting by you on jurisdiction ground is different thing so filing wise since she is living in Nagpur she will definitely choose forum nearest and most convenient to her by creating admission incidences for you to later contest each word / phrases of her complaint and transfer the case to Chennai later by whatever innocence submissions you are saying in your reply.

XXX

can she succeed in getting the jurisdiction in Nagpur?
Reply: That one will come to know once she files!

will i or any family member of mine be arrested, should we take an AB?
Reply: That cause of action may be early as for AB you need Women Cell complaint number OR Police complaint number to show to your jurisdiction Court while seeking AB.

XXX

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XXX

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abdul (MD) 29 December 2012

Thanks for the guidance Sir

abdul (MD) 30 December 2012

Sir,

one more advice needed!!

can she file a kidnapping case or any other case if i go and take back my children?

what should be my action or prevtion method?

regards

abdul

Tajobsindia (Senior Partner ) 31 December 2012

1. A parent cannot kidnap their own child!
Take neutral persons with you and talk it over. Also no force or threat should be applied simple sweet talks failing which Court (custody direction) is the remedy.