sandy (employed) 12 August 2008

Basis of Desertion

I got married last year in Nov. My mother in law had been a problem maker right from day one. In March this year my husband left me at my parents place to visit delhi with his mother. When they came back he called me and said that in order to stay with him in Ahmedabad, I first have to stay with his parents for uncertain time and after his mother is clear with all the doubts (cooking, culture and values) she has for me, I can join him. When I agreed she said that first i need to sign a stamp paper where she will put all conditions and if I over rule any she will take legal actions on me and my family. I did not agree for this since I did not see any grounds for not letting me stay with my husband.

My husband stopped attending my calls and changed his number. When I directly went to Ahmedabad he did not let me get in the house. I was jobless then and all my certificates passport, clothes, jewellery were in A'bad. I told him to return just my certificate and passport and was informed that all my belongings now are with my mother in law. Next day we got a call from a common friend saying that if I want my certificates back I have to sign the divorce paprer first. Its been 4 months now I have not heard a word from my husband. If common friends try and help my mother in law sticks to divorce only. I am not willing to give divorce but came to know that on Basis desertion one can obtain the same. We have not taken any legal action them yet nor did they.

I got a job in Bangalore now and if legal action is needed then want to take it from bangalore only. Can you please adivce.

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4 Replies

D.V.RamaKrishna (Advocate) 13 August 2008

Sandy,

I express my concern at your strained marital relationship and at the same time I would like to appreciate your stand of joining with your husband without giving divorce. You can approach the District Judge of Bengaluru, where you live with a petition for Restitution of Conjugal Rights praying for an order against your husband asking him to join you. Also you can present a petition for return of all your belongings which according to you are being kept with your mother-in-law.

Mohit Attri (lawyer) 14 August 2008

yes i agree wid ramakrishna sir. but u can file the case only in ahmdabad or where u were living together last time.

Shweta Bharti (Human Resource) 14 August 2008

You can apply for “Restitution of Conjugal Rights” under s (9) of Hindu Marriage Act 1955 at district court of bangalore

You can file petition where you are currently residing Under Section 19 (iii a) or where the marriage was solemnized ( S 19 (i)) or the parties to the marriage last resided together ( S 19 (iii) ) of of Hindu Marriage Act 1955

Try to solve the problem. With your positive approach to work your marriage a hit you will def succeed

Shweta

Guest (n/a) 26 August 2008

There are two ways to look at the problem and the solutions. First, decide whether you want to break the marriage or not. Second, decide how you can lead a good married life. Before setting the law into motion, think what in fact you had perceived your role as well as the role of your husband in the marital life and whether there were clear exchange of the perceived roles between both. Love, understanding, compassion, etc. are prerequisites of human life whereas law cannot enforce these subtle human values. There are gives and takes in any relationship. Understand the diverse backgrounds from which the couples emerge and also appreciate the amount of mutual adjustments need to forge a unified life. Marriage is more than a contract. That is why I suggest you weigh the pros and cons of whatever decision you propose to take. If the relations are irretrievably broken, of course, divorce is the only option. Then the only course of action is to seperate with least ill-will. May god bless you.