Avoid divorce

Contest the case with a competent lwayer. If you want to save marriage mediation/ counselling is required.

My husband has not filed a case yet. I also don't want to file a case. Will just waiting help or harm? Can his months of living seperately be counted before he files a case. Could he have filed already without my knowing?

Can his living seperately for so many months become a strong point if he files divorce?

No.  He voluntarily abandoned you; he cannot take benefit of his own wrong and you are not guilty of desertion.  On this ground, he cannot take divorce.

Can I take up a job while he is not living with me or will it hamper any alimony which i could get if I have no way out but to give him a divorce.

maintenance is of two types, one is maintenance during the pendency of case and the other one is permanent alimony.  If you are employed, there is less likely for you to get the maintenance during the pendency of case or you may get reduced amount depending upon your income through job.  Permanent alimony also depends upon your income coming out of your job and its quantum also varies depending upon your job status.  Despite this, I advise you to get a job and woman's economic empowerment will always help her in every stage of her life including during the legal battle with a husband who is bent upon to take divorce from unwilling wife. 

He is actually wanting to give me a divorce without any alimony- can he do that?

No.  But quantum of alimony depends upon various factors and it is not the right stage to ponder over that question as you are interested to keep the marriage alive.

I don't want a divorce- I want him to come back. Can he take a divorce on the basis of mental trauma and can his witnesses to our arguments make his case strong.

Then it is difficult for him to get divorce, if you are not guilty of giving him mental trauma.

I have only aphoto of my bruised face when he hit me with hangers. Will that help? However, finally I want to save my marriage and not let him take a divorce.HELP!

He is liable to be put behind the bars for physically abusing you and law gives you scope to do so to him.  But your craving for restoring matrimonial life will not allow you to take such logical step. 
 

I have my own story to share with you all  .... my FIL is arrogant and he incites my wife to be highly career oriented and forget the meaning of good married life .. My wife is also somewhat imature , i dont know if she acts like that or she really is ... There are so many missing strings in our relationships which neither my wife nor her parents wants to focus upon ... We got married on 18th June 2011 and started our family life on 3rd July 2011 ( there was only both of us in Pune at that time while my parents were living in my 100 KMs away hometown) During marriage we didnt ask for any dowry neither we were in favor of that ... but from that day onwards , it was a complete torture for me .. from 3rd July to 29th Dec . she stayed with me only for 2.5 months and also in that period , her parents were constantly in touch with her through phone like they daily used to call her for 3-4 hours .... 

 

Then one day her sister told me about a job in Mumbai and asked me to switch to Core engg job from IT field .. Before my wife ran away on 29th Dec 2011 , 15 days ago she again called me and abused me for taking my wife to my parents place on weekly basis or  once in 15 days .. 

 

After my sucide attempt on 8th Feb 2012 , she returned back and got a job on 12th March 2012 but again she started complaining about her so called hectic schedule ..blah blah ... and when it was confirmed that she is preggy by 6 week and 6 days on 19th May 2012 .. she started creating scene and after 3 days she sent me a SMS telling me her decision to abort the child ... on 3rd June her dad , brother came and took her away to their place giving false promise of sending her back ... When I asked him to send her back he told me about his decision of giving divorce to me .. When i went their place for negotions , he threatened me and my father for lives and thrown us out ..on 30th June he came and took away all the househole items .. After this whole drama started off and he started abusing my parents, brother and me and asking my parents to force me to agree with his decision otherwise he would file DV cases , dowry cases etc etc... 

 

I sent her a lawyer notice for coming back to my home within 7 days on 14th Aug .. but her dad replied through a lawyer notice asking for a divorce .. I stayed calm for a month which irritated him and finally on 29th Sept he filed for a divorce petition in Buldana( MH )  court which recieved on 20th Oct and i am summoned to the court on 3rd Nov 2012 ..

 

 I have given just a summary of whole happenings here but for a further understanding of whole nonsense ,you can read my blog   .. And guide me

there is no strong points in favour of your husband.. no one can take advantage of his own wrong.. 

you have reason yourself. what will be the sureity that if your husband came back then will not do the same. 

 

regards.

rahul.gogreen@gmail.com

I want to know when alimony is decided what is it based on- the tax he pays? My husband is giving me a certain amount monthly but it does not cover everything. Will this protect him? Can he live without a divorce forever if he keeps sending me this basic amount? Can he remarry without a divorce if he is hindu? 

If he shows that most of the things he has- machines in his hospital and even his car and house are on loan then can he be allowed to give less alimony to me?

My son is not from this husband so can I only ask alimony for myself?

 

Please advice- it will be 5months now since he has left and has begun to meet someone on the quiet but has not communicated with me about his decision.

sum1 plz reply my query. . Sunita hw come ur son is nt frm ur present Husband ? Hw many husbands do u hv had ? I guess tht u r only interested in alimony amount and nt in ur husband . . In reality u r enuff capable , educated for lukin after urself . . Bt as u want an easy money , so u must hv had tortured him so tht he leave d house . . In 1 point u r saying tht u dnt want a divorce bt u want him to come bk . . And in d nxt sentences u say tht he wants it , which u also want secretly bt u want huge amount for that . . If u really want him to come bk then y dnt u start negotiations wid him thru relatives / frnds . . Or file RCR if u want to go thru court . . Btw hw come ur husband hit u and he himself left u ? ? u hv a photo of bruised face . . Ha ha . . Y dnt u hv a medical record of tht?. .i m neither takin side of u nor ur husband as i m a stranger to both . . Bt wat i feel is tht dnt spoil ur and his life in court cases for d sake of ur kid's future . .he is already payin money for ur maintaince . . Let him stay away frm u for few more months if both of u luv each other thn both of u wud stay together foreva . . Bt dnt take help of court for this . . This wud spoil urs n his life . . .and if still nothin works out thn go 4 MCD , bt dnt harass him 4 money he is already takin care of tht ,besides tht u cn take care of urself

RAJESH- i don't wish to write my whole story to a person like you and I don't think you have a right to judge me. This is my second marriage. As an Indian woman I tried working on this marriage even after he hit me. It is his second marriage also but he was cheating on me and when he got more intersted in somebody else he left me. I am not interested in dry cleaning him but after 10years of marriage and being 43 with a child I have a right to ask for some alimony. He has been pushing me to divorce him and I am not into fighting in a court but I have a right to know what I need to do to protect myself. IS THAT ENOUGH for you to understand how wrong you are.

by Sunita Bhandari on 03 December 2012 RAJESH- i don't wish to write my whole story to a person like you and I don't think you have a right to judge me. This is my second marriage. my point : - i m neither takin side of u nor ur husband as i m a stranger to both . . Bt wat i feel is tht dnt spoil ur and his life in court cases for d sake of ur kid's future. by Sunita Bhandari on 28 October 2012 My husband has left me since july 2012. He has been living in a seperate house. He has been sending me monthly money to spend and a car and driver. He has also been paying most of the bills related to my house. He wants a divorce- I DON'T. Can his living seperately for so many months become a strong point if he files divorce? Can I take up a job while he is not living with me or will it hamper any alimony which i could get if I have no way out but to give him a divorce. He is actually wanting to give me a divorce without any alimony- can he do that? I am not interested in dry cleaning him but after 10years of marriage and being 43 with a child I have a right to ask for some alimony. Tht says it all Sunita madam . . u may hv got alimony frm ur 1st husband . . If I m nt mistaken otherwise u wudnt hv divorce him . . . Y do u need second time alimony if u hv already got once . . Govt needs to change Alimony procedures to curb divorce rate . . . . I guess this shud b enuff for u Sunita Madam

seriously divorce has become a multi billion crore industry in india . . Where money minded lawyers , police ofcers , money minded wives and in-laws loot husbands in d name of alimony amounts by taking help of DV , 498A , 125 , 406 acts which r all gender biased . . Hw come no wife has eva been punished under DV act , 498a ( for givin dowry in wedding ) . . Hasnt paid a single penny to husbands who cnt maintain themselves or poorer than wife side . . Sunita i m nt against u nor i wish to . . Its ur life and i got nothin to do wid it

Rajesh- my first husband also ran away with all my jewelry and things given to me by my parents leaving a month old son in my hand. I got NO ALIMONY in the first marriage because he ditched his own family also. My father was in a job and so helped me while I worked too. My parents are retired now and my salary will not be able to cover my son's private school fee. I cannot take him out of the school as he is in 9th and has earned 3scholar badges in his school whioch will help him become a head boy by 12th.

 

I want to know when alimony is decided what is it based on- the tax he pays? My husband is giving me a certain amount monthly but it does not cover everything. Will this protect him? Can he live without a divorce forever if he keeps sending me this basic amount? Can he remarry without a divorce if he is hindu? 

If he shows that most of the things he has- machines in his hospital and even his car and house are on loan then can he be allowed to give less alimony to me?

My son is not from this husband so can I only ask alimony for myself?

 

Please advice- it will be 5months now since he has left and has begun to meet someone on the quiet but has not communicated with me about his decision.

 

did u divorce ur 1st husband or just got remarried after getting ex-parte divorce . As far as i knw ,HMA needs atleast 7 years disappearance of any spouse . Talk to ur hubby openly abt ur problems and if he doesnt aggree for alimony thn ask him to pay monthly variable amnt depending on inflation rate . . . Get the house nd car registered in ur name . . . Sell both for an handsome price . . Purchase a cheap flat and car ( if u cnt live without it thn only ). . Ask ur husband to take care of ur Son's education . . Hire a govt registered pvt detective and collect proofs of ur hubby's EMA. . Throw those proofs on ur hubby's face and then put ur demands b4 him . . Well i m nt a legal expert . . I cn just suggest u various ways . . . final decision wud always b urs only . . :) ball is in ur court nw . . Take it or leave it

.if marriage registered under hma then file rcr hma sec 9. and express your will to join your husband. rest of the things can be sorted out during the proceedings. STRICTLY NO FOR FALSE DV, 498A.