Exclusive HOLI Discounts!
Get Courses and Combos at Upto 50% OFF!
Upgrad
LCI Learning

Share on Facebook

Share on Twitter

Share on LinkedIn

Share on Email

Share More

rajesh (asdadad)     29 October 2012

I dont need a divorce from my wife but her dad wants it

 

I have my own story to share with you all  .... my FIL is arrogant and he incites my wife to be highly career oriented and forget the meaning of good married life .. My wife is also somewhat imature , i dont know if she acts like that or she really is ... There are so many missing strings in our relationships which neither my wife nor her parents wants to focus upon ... We got married on 18th June 2011 and started our family life on 3rd July 2011 ( there was only both of us in Pune at that time while my parents were living in my 100 KMs away hometown) During marriage we didnt ask for any dowry neither we were in favor of that ... but from that day onwards , it was a complete torture for me .. from 3rd July to 29th Dec . she stayed with me only for 2.5 months and also in that period , her parents were constantly in touch with her through phone like they daily used to call her for 3-4 hours .... 

 

Then one day her sister told me about a job in Mumbai and asked me to switch to Core engg job from IT field .. Before my wife ran away on 29th Dec 2011 , 15 days ago she again called me and abused me for taking my wife to my parents place on weekly basis or  once in 15 days .. 

 

After my sucide attempt on 8th Feb 2012 , she returned back and got a job on 12th March 2012 but again she started complaining about her so called hectic schedule ..blah blah ... and when it was confirmed that she is preggy by 6 week and 6 days on 19th May 2012 .. she started creating scene and after 3 days she sent me a SMS telling me her decision to abort the child ... on 3rd June her dad , brother came and took her away to their place giving false promise of sending her back ... When I asked him to send her back he told me about his decision of giving divorce to me .. When i went their place for negotions , he threatened me and my father for lives and thrown us out ..on 30th June he came and took away all the househole items .. After this whole drama started off and he started abusing my parents, brother and me and asking my parents to force me to agree with his decision otherwise he would file DV cases , dowry cases etc etc... 

 

I sent her a lawyer notice for coming back to my home within 7 days on 14th Aug .. but her dad replied through a lawyer notice asking for a divorce .. I stayed calm for a month which irritated him and finally on 29th Sept he filed for a divorce petition in Buldana( MH )  court which recieved on 20th Oct and i am summoned to the court on 3rd Nov 2012 ..

 

 I have given just a summary of whole happenings here but for a further understanding of whole nonsense ,you can read my blog   .. And guide me 

 


Learning

 13 Replies

ketan (SE)     29 October 2012

@Rajesh, I am not a lawyer but can guide you. Take Divorce why you want to catch in dowry and DV cases. they make your life hell.

I am not understing why you not want to take divorce. it is golden chance for you. give her divorce and start your life with new girl.


Already lots happen with you. Still if you cont this merriage then sorry to say but you don't have mind. Just give him divorce and start your new life.

Tajobsindia (Senior Partner )     29 October 2012

1. See you cannot bring a mare to well.  In Indian marriages third party influence spoils the whole meaning of marriage r/w adversial Laws of the land.

2. We understand due to facts as in your brief you are a harassed husband and you have two options;

One – Spend years in litigation and get same facts at the end – divorce
Advantage – Neutralise all her moves by being neutral to party to divorce and let her wriggle out. When wife is petitioner then she has to speed it out in comparison to husband in such facts which is infact better for divorce.
Disadvantage – Needs long patience and loss of mental peace.

Two – Contest tooth and nail and with few emotional sufferings here and there get same facts at the end – divorce.
Advantage – Satisfaction that you got divorce on your terms as every resistance moves by your side will prolong and defeat her / her sides frustrations.
Disadvantage - Needs long patience and loss of mental peace.

Pick your poison from above and face accordingly as law does not see the color of the petition but facts and person who faces such facts is the best person to choose h/er path accordingly.
 

Never Give Up (Fighter)     29 October 2012

If she is not using her own brains and goes by her father's wish..then days are not far when you and your family is hit by 498a, domestic violence case..

 

Let her go ...

Rahul Kapoor (Legal Enthusiast)     29 October 2012

no one can compel you for giving divorce but how can u be so sure that if she comes back will not create whole scene again. reason yourself then take a decision. 

rajesh (asdadad)     29 October 2012

 

I love her more than anybody else in this world ...I am 33 year old and I have never been in any relationship before , in fact I have saved my love for my future wife and thats what currently i am doing ... And I guess that she is also doing the same ... But I fail to understand my in-laws behavior .. I dont knwo for what bl**dy reasons , they wash her mind.. After my sucide attempt , her parents were adament to send her back to me but she ignored their insistence and returned back ... and she have had also corrected her mistakes .. she have had changed her mobile number so that her phone calls can be reduced .. she started behaving nicely with me .. only thing is that sometimes , she was very stubborn and really stiff to break down .. But once the news of her pregnency broke out .. all hell started coming back to me and her parents went back to their original mould .. Before marriage i thought that they are good people as they are very well educated and have a reasonable social status in their city .. But after marriage , they changed their colors and started acting like slum-dwellers .. I dont know if their daughter have had forced them  for a marriage with me which they have had always opposed and now they want us to get seperated .. or may be this marriage was for a Show-Off for the so called society and internally my wife have had an affair with a guy from different cast and for saving their social status they aggreed with her plan for this fake marriage ... and now may be they want to get rid of me as quickly as possible as already 1 year has passed for our marriage and now they can safely take a divorce within 6 months and can marry her with that guy .. I dont know what was their motive behind aggreing with  this marriage .. 

 

Her dad is a well known politician and my parents are from simple middle class .. I dont know what made him to marry his daughter with me who is not financially well , having crossed 32 years of age and living 550 KMs away from his hometown ..


(Guest)
Rajesh Check your PM please and reply

rajesh (asdadad)     29 October 2012

I have replied to PMs ... Ketan and Fight_with_498a .. please check it ...

Rahul Kapoor (Legal Enthusiast)     29 October 2012

if they are not letting u to meet her then file the writ of habeus corpus in the highcourt..

 

regards

rahul.gogreen@gmail.com

rajesh (asdadad)     29 October 2012

she is doing all this nonsense following  the suggestions by her parents... her dad is an extremely arrogant person and he wants me to be a slave of him and his daughter which i have always denied to be .. As i have had caught her logging into a  guy's  Facebook account using his log in ID and password , i simply asked her about that guy ... she said that it is a fake account but my questions were that if it is a fake then how come you have put a specific name , surname , school name , work location city , birth date ... I guess that they fear that my wife could not be a dominative person like her sister in our married life because i may have had caught her previous affair and for this reason she may have to listen to me all the time ... Well honestly to tell you , i dont give a damn to her past life as i am not cleaner from my side also .. i have had an affair at the age of 19 with my cousin sis who was 14 year old at that time ... but it was a total imatufication and nothing more than that ...

 

they have raised thier daughter to be a highly career oriented person and they think that my wife is an Chemical engr from MIT USA who was nominated for Nobel prize .. funny thing is , on a lawyer notice which was sent by her dad asking for divorce , was in the name of my wife along with her educational qualifications ... Ha ha .. I dont know if he had thought that he is sending me a wedding card ( we marathi's normally put educational details of bride and groom on our wedding invitation cards) ... I just need to break down the ego of my FIL ,MIL and SIL otherwise i dont have any problems with my wife excluding her arrogance at few times which is a parcel of married life .. and  her career oriented thinking which can be quashed away once we have a baby .. Only problem is with her sister, father and mom .. otherwise my wife is the best person ...  

rajesh (asdadad)     05 November 2012

Funny ... on 3rd Nov , neither her lawyer, dad , mediator nor my wife appeared before court . And also there is a good news . District Judge of Buldana is from my village and a classmate of my lawyer ( I have taken my Dad's lawyer friend to Buldana as we didn't trust any lawyer from Buldana city ) .. That district judge helped us a lot , first he threatened my wife's lawyer if he tries to be smart with us and he told him to ask my FIL to be polite in out of court settlement .. As they have had mentioned in divorce petition , they were asking 5 lakh for permenent settlement , but once my FIL came to know that Judge is on our side , he came down to 1-2 lakh , but we told him that we can give you only a signature on divorce papers and nothing more than that ... Then he came down to 50K .. but we told him that atmost we can give you 25K or atmost we can allow you to keep our 30 Gram gold ornaments and leave us forever ...

As the judge who was supposed to decide our matter , was on leave on that day , we have taken a new Date as 1st Dec 2012 .. That district Judge helped us to find the best lawyer from Buldana who can fight for me in future and that lawyer is fighting my case for free ... So for the moment I am happy .. Lets see what happens on 1st Dec

Shonee Kapoor (Legal Evangelist - TRIPAKSHA)     05 November 2012

So esstentially you are also looking for divorce now.

 

So when you wanna go east, move east not west.

 

Regards,


Shonee Kapoor

2 Like

Sandy12345 (none)     05 November 2012

Rightely said by shonee ji

rajesh (asdadad)     05 November 2012

Honestly to tell  you , still I dont want a divorce as there is absolutely no serious reason for breaking up this relationship .. Only there is a minor compatibility issue between us but it is bound to happen becos of our hectic metro life and this is just the first year of our married life ... Both of us need to give time to each other and ignore other people's suggestions .. But legal initiative has been taken by my wife's side and they have filed for divorce .. So what can be done such case .. That District judge was suggesting me and my lawyer to go for mediation or marriage counselling but as so much have already happened that it can not be advisable in my case .. Neither my wife can leave her arrogance nor her parents and sister will ever give her invaluable suggestion which are helpful for running a stable married life .. So whats the use of 3 mediation sessions .. Already 5 months have been passed and I have never been allowed to talk her neither she has been totally brain-washed by her parents so much so that she doesn't accept any stranger  phone call neither she replies my mails , SMSs ..

Sometimes I feel that she was already previously married but legaly as she have never shown me her Voter ID card ever ( remember she have had 2 previous jobs and i dont think that those companies have had hired her without seeking her residence proof ) .. Lot many things are crossing through my mind and I want her to clear out them but she isnot coming forward ..besides that her father urged me not to contact her .. Ok then let it be like that and I am prepared for divorce ..if someone dont want to live with me then i can not force anyone .. I did my best to clear every doubt which she have had about me but still there is absolutely no response from her side rather her relatives , parents are coming up with new mistakes of mine on timely basis .. None of them is ready to discuss my 1000s of allegations against whole family but discussing on that is not on their agenda ..So mediation is useless in my case  


Leave a reply

Your are not logged in . Please login to post replies

Click here to Login / Register