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Sunny (Other)     01 August 2012

How can a man safeguard himself before and after marriage?

  1. In India, 80-85% divorces are initiated by women.
  2. 75-80% women marry for money and luxury
  3. Most of the dowry and domestic violence cases are false
  4. Now there is talk about giving a women the right to separate whenever she wants and the man doesn't have the right to appeal against it. 
  5. Men are always expected to give alimony even if the wife is working and earning well
  6. Women try to grab as much property and assets after a divorce even if she herself has more property and assets than the husband
  7. In laws are regularly harassed by greedy daughter in laws

I and many of my friends who're still single want to know how we can safeguard ourselves before we marry someone. In case of a divorce, what are the options available to us if we safeguard ourselves before marriage itself? How can we make sure that when we marry, the woman can't take us for a ride with the support of our one sided laws. Please suggest any solution or a combination of solutions.

These one sided laws are stopping guys from marrying any girl. This has to stop immediately otherwise the rot will badly increase in the society where everyone wants to do everything, live together, have kids etc but not marry.



Learning

 14 Replies

Tajobsindia (Senior Partner )     01 August 2012

1. Invite all your “male" friends to LCI Membership is First.
2. Now daily you and your single male friends read last 100 messages in Family Law / Civil Law / Constitutiona Law and Criminal Law Forums is Second.


That is where best safeguarding before / during and after marriage you and your male friends could ever give to each one of you yourselves.


OR

If above two advise are not possible to do then you and your group of friends deserve what is going to come. PERIOD.

1 Like

Sunny (Other)     01 August 2012

We will educate ourselves, thanks.

However right now we're looking for solutions.

Tajobsindia (Senior Partner )     01 August 2012

This arrogance has drowned many youths (males).

There are 41 Acts / Codes applicable to a marriage and you want "solution” then do
LLB or follow what is the only solution suggested previously.

If still you have arrogance left then the below is another solution for youths like you and your friends;

1. Look out for OR marry a deaf, dumb, un-educated, poorest of poor, major age, good looking and fertile girl with no past lineage known / present in this world.

 

2 Like

Sunny (Other)     01 August 2012

Sir, I think you got me wrong. I meant that we want to educate ourselves thats why I've made a start by joning this forum and posting a question. My friends will join too soon.

We have been hearing about remedies available but there was so much information that we thought it's best to join a forum and clarify. Men also have a right to live like equal citizens in their own country, I hope you will agree.

Sunny (Other)     01 August 2012

By the way, are you a lady or a gentleman? I'm asking coz if you're a man too, you can probably understand me better.

Tajobsindia (Senior Partner )     01 August 2012

1. There is no off the counter packaged syrup as 'solution'  available
Illustration:
The girl is down to earth, everything goes well . She  behaves normally with you and your side of family. She gets pregnant. During 10th. week (say) she goes to her natal home with your permission. One the way at a chemist shop near your home she buys MT Pill and Misopost 200mg in one bill and Revital cap. via another bill and asks for Cash Memo on your name. She carrys forward and reaches natal home and takes the pill. Termination of pregnancy happens. Meanwhile for curtsey sake you visit here at he natal home, it is obvious you will bring / carry some gifts and some medicines too bze she is pregnant and any husband does that i.e. look after a pregnant wife. Everybody is hale and smiley there. Afterwards she comes back to your home and behaves all of a sudden. And she goes to natal home when you are gone to your office and files a case of ‘forced abortion” + dowry and what other cases.  

Here she has solid alibi + bills + termination of pregnency proof + witness and jolly well put you and your family for minimum 7 years behind bars. Is above illustration is in my dreams or in yours and your friends dream do you really think that a "solution" today can be given ! You are just joking before us is all that I can say.  

Like above there are nearly 68000 situations (facts) relating to marriage, I can give you almost all of them (facts picked from AIR / SCC Law reporters). Ask yourself can members here give you all those solutions before and post marriage in one “innocent” thread post. That is why I suggested read last so many posts as continuous education or do
LLB or follow the last option of which type of girl to marry.

 
2. BTW, I am a male. 

3. This is a "legal portal" site. If there is a legal problem encountered we can suggest legal remedy. For "bonding" - if I'm a male I can understand you better like you say or M2M / M2F / F2M / F2F etc. etc. "social media websites" are there.  I have to only understand a legal problem / facts here not otherwise. You may or may not have future legal problems but by making a "compodium of solutions today" you cannot be sure to say next "almost all solutions to bad marriages I found today and I will be safe tomorrow" hence these three replies from me are 'just' here.


A prospective metro wife when, why and where does what legally is not possible to put in "advance solution" category before she even "attempts" to do one, if anyone says it is possible then it is not called as a "marriage" but referred to as 'economics of arrangments" between two consenting major opposite age s*xes.

1 Like

Sunny (Other)     01 August 2012

Ya I understand that there can be many such unique situations and issues and the legal remedies will be unique.

I'll be more specific about my question:

 

A pre-nuptial agreement can be signed between the boy and the girl before marriage. The agreement will state the following:


1) The boy and his family have not asked for any kind of dowry and the girl or her family have not given any

2) Since both the boy and girl are working in jobs, they will share the day to day household expenses

3) In case of divorce, neither the boy or the girl will have any right or claim to other party's money or assets

 

Having such an agreement in place will at least establish the intent of the two parties. This signing of the agreement can also be videotaped in presence of respective lawyers.

Are there any additional measures which can be taken before marriage?

Sunny (Other)     01 August 2012

I'm fine with whatever people can call it, with so many men being harassed nowadays, we just want to safeguard our lives and our families. Nobody wants problems in marriage but we have to be prepared.

Adv.R.P.Chugh (Advocate/Legal Consultant (rpchughadvocatesupremecourt@hotmail.com))     01 August 2012

Though the best way to safeguard yourself remains - 'not marrying' however there are  a couple things that can be done to reasonably anticipate and guard against a possible false implication by wife. Though Indian Courts as a matter of policy won't give effect to pre-nups. Read the following article.

How to fight a false 498A ?

 

“For men in India marriage is a lottery but you can’t tear up your ticket even if you lose…” and it’s not just you who would have to live with the lost lottery but your entire family may have to suffer at the hands of a system so grossly skewed in favour of women.

 

Marriages may fall apart for a lot of reasons, temperamental issues, compatibility problems, but does that make you an offender in the eyes of law? Yes it does, your estranged wife in order to have her way in arm-twisting you may implicate you and your family in end number of false cases, 498A being the foremost.

 

498A penalizes cruelty for dowry, almost always comes alongwith S.406 Allegations which basically penalize the criminal breach of trust, when your wife’s articles are entrusted to you and you fail to return them back – misappropriate them or convert them to own use – you are criminally liable !. By aid of S.34 of the Indian Penal Code – your family/relatives can be held liable for the same if they share the common intention with you.

 

Now if you think that you have a wife who can potentially do this for money or the kicks that her ego gets out of the same or pure vengeance then you are my friend in a vulnerable situation, but there is a silver lining to this, there are legal strategies that may help minimize, if not completely rule out, the damage or mischief that may occur to you.

 

Being a Supreme Court Advocate and a Mens Rights Activist I speak from experience, the following things may(if done correctly) help in a lot of cases :-

 

1. Insist on a dowry-less marriage - Preparing of list of articles received at the time of marriage, countersigned by both the families, would help rule out exaggerated claims later !

 

2. Digging the well before the fire starts; when trouble starts at home you apprise all concerned of the problems that you are facing, not for the purposes of any action but information;

 

If you see things going awry in near future, then it would be good idea to seperate from parents to a rented house with sufficient public notices;

 

3. As per the prevailing law atleast here in Delhi, if your wife approaches a Police Station with her complaint, she is to be forwarded CAW CELL instituted to try and reconcile and investigate and act as buffers so that penal actions are not inititated right away. Once the matter goes to CAW Cell – apply for an anticipatory bail , you are sure to get notice bail atleast – this would help in two ways :-

 

a) Give you greater confidence, level playing field in the CAW Cell talks;

 

b) Prevent any hasty arrest on failure of conciliation;

 

All in all nothing to lose in this and in this step 1. Would help a great deal.

 

4. Seek a copy of complaint via RTI ASAP, since they deny at the first instance you’d have to appeal therefrom which may take some time. There are CIC Decisions that would help you here.

 

5. In the event of an FIR being registered apply for AB again, and quashing of FIR (not always depends on the kind of allegations leveled)

 

6. Filing Restitution of Conjugal Rights (case that you want her back) may help in some cases, but not in all. Sometimes it helps in defending maintenance cases, and showing your bona fides.

 

7. Keep a check on your wife’s finances. Would come handy defending maintenance cases.

 

8. Prosecution (S.340 CrpC) for perjury in cases of false & exaggerated claims in maintenance petitions.

 

9. Tax Evasion Petitions once you get the List of Istridhan may also help put pressure.

 

10. Dowry Prohibition Act – penalizes giving of dowry so in case there is a clear admission of DOWRY (not Istridhan) then in that case your in laws are also liable to be prosecuted. Think on these lines !

 

11. With a marital property law on the anvil, don't buy property in your name, much less jointly with spouse.

 

The above may go a great deal helping you defend correctly, my advise would be to stand your ground, don’t give in to their extortionate tactics, once you’d get an AB the worst would already be over and after that the judicial system with it’s endemic delays won’t treat your wife differently, sooner or later she would realize that frivolous litigation doesn’t pay !

 

The Author is a Supreme Court Advocate, and a Mens Rights Activist and can be reached at bharat.law06@gmail.com, Tel : 9810553252.

1 Like

Priya (Training Administrator)     01 August 2012

I am not a lawyer, Don't think too much on all these to spoil your real"YOU". Just few things which make big difference in marriage

select your bride who will be best suitable to be as your wife(character), without implying so many conditions like name, fame, societal boom, etc etc......

Wishes for your well-chosen married life.

Sunny (Other)     01 August 2012

Wow, thanks so much Mr Chugh. This sounds good. Seems like the best bet is not to marry and live in with my partner. 

 

In case that's not easy to do (though I will try that as first option), then won't it suffice if I sign a pre-nup with her with the following conditions and video tape the agreement signing with my lawyer?

 

1) No dowry has been asked for or given

2) All expenses post marriage will be shared equally (since the girl is working)

3) In case of divorce, nobody owes anyone else a dime

 

How about this?? This will at least hold good as a civil contract if nothing else, right?

Sunny (Other)     01 August 2012

Priya, you're still living in a fool's paradise, its a fact that most women marry for money and to leech the money and assets of the guy, its a racket now, a protitution racket, I want to protect myself from this, is that too much to ask for?

Sunny (Other)     03 August 2012

What nonsense is this, and there is no provision to delete these spam posts???

 

Is the site administrator watching???

Sunny (Other)     03 August 2012

Is there any lawyer on this forum who can answer the original question please? 


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