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Rahul (SE)     19 October 2014

Worried about brother's marriage

My brother has loved a girl and he is willing to marry her.

But, none of my family members are fine with it as we see a change in my brother's attitude and we are not fine with the bride's family and their values.

Before marriage itself, he has developed extensive hatred among all family members and is asking to distribute property (which we earned with efforts from all our family members) which rest of us are not fine with.

We believe in joint family and we believe in traditions and values. We feel he is forced from the bride's side that if my brother is not able to convince my family, my brother can demand for his share in our property and later they can live without anyone's help. We also feel that the bride and her parents are blackmailing my brother emotionally.

My brother started criticizing everyone in our family though we didn't utter a negative sentence about him. 

We very much care about my brother and his future.

How do I convince my brother (currently he is not listening to anyone of us) and let him avoid this love marriage which is resulting in breaking the relationships in our families rather than bonding all families which generally happens in an arranged marriage.

(No engagement/discussion has happened with the bride till now).

Please help.



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 6 Replies

Laxmi Kant Joshi (Advocate )     19 October 2014

Your query is not a legal query, talk to your brother and share your openion about his marriage that you and all family members are not interested in that girl ,you all want his arrange marriage , give him some moral values .

Rahul (SE)     19 October 2014

Thank you Sir for prompt response.

We tried negotiating the same with my brother.

He is not at all listening to us and he says he has promised the girl and it seems she threatened him that if he doesn't marry her, she will attempt for suicide. 

We are worried about the legal consequences we are going to face from bride side and from my brother as well.

Please advise as to how to convince him and save him from this love marriage.

Rahul (SE)     19 October 2014

This worsened a lot.

Now, he is forcing all of us to write a deed for property distribution.

And, he is not caring anyone in the family and started scolding everyone and even fighting with us.

Please advise

Prasad (Systems Engineer)     19 October 2014

 
Hi Rahul... 
 
Here is my suggestion.
 
There is no love in this marriage.  
Your brother may be in love. 
But the girl and her family is certainly brainwashing your brother.
 
Please stop talking against your brother's wish.
All of you start acting as though you all agree to his wish to marry his lover.
 
Then find as many subtle reasons to delay the marriage.
Tell that, as per horoscope, marriage should be delayed by few months.
 
During this time, keep talking to your brother with care and love so that he understands the following.
 
"Dear Brother... you love that girl. We are fine with it.
 You can marry the girl that you love.
 But, why is the girl behind your money? 
 Why is your brother-in-law blackmailing you?
 If she is giving suicide threats even before marriage, will she not do the same after marriage as well?
 Please think about all these before making a final decision." 
 
 
Please make sure not to fight with your brother. 
Else he will go far away from you and will not change his mind.

Rahul (SE)     20 October 2014

Thank you Prasad Sir for your suggestion.

Yeah. We follow the same as you have suggested and will keep you posted on the update.

Sudhir Kumar, Advocate (Advocate)     21 October 2014

it is not a legal query.

 

if he seeks division you have to given him unless whole property is self earned by parents.


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