Need justice


My age 43 private employee, married at age 18 got two kids one girl 18 and boy 23. My Husband 50 Central Govt servant. My husband suspicious by nature since I got married. I thought it must be due to his mother schizophrenia patient brought up. And I never questioned him coz I never made any mistake. So there is no point in proving myself. 5 years back he crossed his limits and fixed vedio recording in my bedroom. And I lost patience. I didn't understand what to do. his job, and social status were always my barriers to take ant legal action. I approached his office and requested him to transfer. And they immediately transferred. There after he never took care of us. After 4 years I thought my daughter is growing up and i need to get her married and since my son done his engineering gave my husband chance to comeback. And approached him. He already got married to a Muslim lady. Then somehow created a high drama and used me get them divorced. I paid that lady one lakh.as Mehr. They got divorced and I requested their officials that now he is getting old and transfer him back. And for which they agreed and transferred back to Hyderabad. After 6 months I realised my husband and that lady made me fool and both of them are continuing relationship. That lady is prostitue by profession. Now my query things are so complicated. I can't open my mouth for legal justice coz this fellow will loose job and I will never get any anything out of it. I am tired of my job and want to retire not able to concentrate . If I leave job I don't have any source of income.my daughter marriage, studies, social status. This fellow at present is taking care of my daughter education. And provisions but nothing in savings. My query can I claim maintenance without divorce. Please suggest. At the age of 42+ should I take divorce Leave all government benefits?
 
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LAWYER

No,

a Big No.... 

You have tolerated a major portion of life in such pain ,it is better to hold on. Don't quit your job that would make you lame, concentrate on you job. Your son is still not in a position that he will give you the caring suppourt as requiered.

You daughter's marraige is your priortym try to invest you mind and energy in that development, ignore what affairs your husband is having as he will not turn to be so as expected by you in few days. Talk with your husband seriously about the marriage of your daughter, and suppourt your son till he is gets settled, just little more time and your worries will end. There is always light at the end of tunnel.

reagrding seeking maintenance through any legal way is not good at this stage, if you quit job ( which you should not) then your husband is bound to maintain you .

However to marry your daughter is the duty of your hsband you  should compel him to arrange for that.

Divorce at this stgae will spoil the situation and will add any good for now.

 

 
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Originally posted by : Bilal U Gani
No,

a Big No.... 

You have tolerated a major portion of life in such pain ,it is better to hold on. Don't quit your job that would make you lame, concentrate on you job. Your son is still not in a position that he will give you the caring suppourt as requiered.

You daughter's marraige is your priortym try to invest you mind and energy in that development, ignore what affairs your husband is having as he will not turn to be so as expected by you in few days. Talk with your husband seriously about the marriage of your daughter, and suppourt your son till he is gets settled, just little more time and your worries will end. There is always light at the end of tunnel.

reagrding seeking maintenance through any legal way is not good at this stage, if you quit job ( which you should not) then your husband is bound to maintain you .

However to marry your daughter is the duty of your hsband you  should compel him to arrange for that.

Divorce at this stgae will spoil the situation and will add any good for now.

 

Do you want queris to commit sucide? What kind of advice is this? Are you alright in your head? Mr?

 
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LAWYER

Originally posted by : Martin S.



Originally posted by : Bilal U Gani



No,

a Big No.... 

You have tolerated a major portion of life in such pain ,it is better to hold on. Don't quit your job that would make you lame, concentrate on you job. Your son is still not in a position that he will give you the caring suppourt as requiered.

You daughter's marraige is your priortym try to invest you mind and energy in that development, ignore what affairs your husband is having as he will not turn to be so as expected by you in few days. Talk with your husband seriously about the marriage of your daughter, and suppourt your son till he is gets settled, just little more time and your worries will end. There is always light at the end of tunnel.

reagrding seeking maintenance through any legal way is not good at this stage, if you quit job ( which you should not) then your husband is bound to maintain you .

However to marry your daughter is the duty of your hsband you  should compel him to arrange for that.

Divorce at this stgae will spoil the situation and will add any good for now.

 





Do you want queris to commit sucide? What kind of advice is this? Are you alright in your head? Mr?

The Quirist knows what i told her.. lest you may give her ideas to do that...

 
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Dear Martin,

 

Can you suggest an alternative for this.

 
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Dear Sir,

Thank you for the suggestion, if in case i am falling sick or met with some kind of serious accident, then what will be my fate?

I have every evidence of this fellows acts, but at this point of age being a mature person commiting such dirty unpunishable mistake, not able to do anything and as well not able to protect myself.

After my daughters marriage I have to quit the world, as my husband dosent need me, my children have their partners to take care and at 45 age i am left alone without any moral support? How is it justified?

 

 
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Advocate

The facts stated are sufficient for you to seek and obtain divorce and adequate alimony. His second marriage places him in a vulnerable position. He is liable for departmental action, if you submit a compalint.

Since the children are grown up and he is taking care of the daughter, there is no need to be too much perturbed over their future.

Discretion is yours. As regards to future, it depends upon our willingness to face the challenges, as and when they occur.

 
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Lawyer

Seek divorce on the grounds explained by you, consult and engage a local prudent lawyer.

 
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Advocate

For all the reasons mentioned by you to continue in this situation, i would just like to ask you one question- what is the guarantee that if you remain silent your husband will contribute for your daughter's marriage? that he will look after you? Nothing. 

I would therefore advise you to stop thinking about everyone else and put yourself first.  You need to fight for your rights.  You have wasted enough years already. 

Now to answer to your query, yes you can claim for maintenance without seeking Divorce. I would advise you to file for maintenance only at this stage.  Your husband doesnt need to be handed over Divorce on a platter. Before filing, however, collect all proofs discreetly to enable you to seek maintenance i.e. proof of your husband's income, his relationship with that lady etc.      

 
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Thanks alot will do
 
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