Need help to get legally separted from my parents

Originally posted by : Manoj Chennai
	ALL, I want to get legally seperated from my parents. I'm 32 yr male chennai. I got married in 2006 and mutually got divorced on 2010 and i recently got married and i'm living peacefully. Both my Father and mother have a lot of debt which they have bought without my notice, I tried my best to clear all the debt they had. I'm having surprises daily and recently i came to know that they have bought money saying that my son has divorce issue, So he needed money.  They have got in laksh from different people for big interest, now the debt has come in multiple lakhs. My parents never gave even a single penny to me. My sister is also  included in it, both my sister and my mother go to our neighbours and ask for money for my divorce. Not sure where my parents or my sister has spent my money, till now i dont have a clue. We had our incestor property that also has been sold because of my mother compulsion, and the property was in my mother name. Now the property is sold still the debt is more than what we sold.  I have had enougth for last 15 years, now i have to get myself seperated from both my father and mother. All they want is their daughter to live peacefully and they dont care about me. I dont want people to come to my doors. In all their debt, i have not signed in any of the papers. But my parents have told that they are getting the money for me, So i'm worried i might get into trouble. Please help, what should i do to lead a good wife with my wife. Note:  I cannot change my parents, I have had enougth talk but all are useless. They are old and they cannot change Father and mother they dont work. Sister is married and living in their inlaw house I can deposit 10k in their bank account every month, So that they can take care of themself Other than that, i dont have want to have any relationship with them, i want to legally get seperated. Thanks,

Unfortunately there is no divorce laws to get divorce from parents.  Our laws are formed on basis of Hindu dharma.  And as matter of duty it is your headache to clear of debts of your parents.  Even if you dont clear it now, and if they pass away, people who lent money will catch hold of your collar after they die.  There is no way that you can get away from clearing the debt.  Your parents are still alive.  Legally, what loan they took they have to return as they are still alive, only in case they die, you will have to clear the debts that they took.  Until such time no worries.  But as matter of conscience you will have to clear the debts of your parents as they stood beside your debalce Number 1 (first marriage debacle) that would have cost them money too.  Looking after you and your sister all that they did out of love and affection, you too should show same love and affection to them in old age.

You can however tell that you will part with 10k every month.  However if that is insufficient they can approach court of Law seeking maintenance from you and your sister, as you are legally duty bound to maintain old age parents u/s 125 crpc.

It is believed that you are Hindu.

Confirm!

Now Hindu son does not have obligation to pay debt of father.

If you are not Co-Borrower, guarantor you are not liable to pay.

Partition of ancestral property is a perspective. Avoid possession to be taken by lenders in a given untoward situation. Save the property and money for future.

Involve some elders and let everyone in neighborhood know that you don’t need money and hence they should not lend.

Counsel your sister and have a frank discussion with parents that the family does not need to borrow.

Thanks Kumar.

In my situation both my father and mother has got debts. They have not spent a single money for me, Where they spend the money and why they got they money is something my parents are not ready to share and they will not.

Spoke to them for last few years, Now things have got into my head and i cannot live normally. People are knocking my doors saying your mother got the money for you. I dont know how to react

Due to my mother compulsion land is sold and for least amount of money, again but the person who bought the land has not given the complete money.

Everything my mother does, she doesnt ask a suggestion, I still remember she called me and asked me to come and sign and go, which i did. The only reason i signed is she will clear her debt but that doesnt happen.

I'm in deep sh**t again, I dont know how to survive again or ending my life is the best thing to do. 

Helping Hand,

Where they spend the money is still unknown, You want me to take the debt for 30 lakhs ? That will end my life. 

I can understand ur situtation

be a software enginner,earn good money or abscond

Originally posted by : Manoj Chennai
	Helping Hand, Where they spend the money is still unknown, You want me to take the debt for 30 lakhs ? That will end my life.

I dont want you to take debt.  If parents dont pay money, people who lent money will catch hold of you only. If you had taken debt, they would have catch hold of your parents or taken away some property which belongs to you ppl.  Anyhow they are your parents, you are talking as if they are somebody else;s parents. Shame on people like you.  Dont forget your kids will treat you the same way or worse than this when you are in same situation.  Dont forget that, what goes around comes around.  Rest your fate.

It is strange that people keep on lending money like this.

And you keep on paying like this.

Probably the lenders know they can make a quick buck as mentioned by you in your posts.

Until you act firmly, to stop money being lent in your name, without your consent, and the share of property being disposed at throwaway prices, the situation may continue.

Instead of giving in to situation, resolve it once for all, amicably, preferably.

Helping Hand,

You will not understand my situation.

1. In my first marriage. During mutal divorce, i was suppose to submit her jewels to her. But found that all her jewels are sold out by my mother and those were changed for dummy jewels

2. Eg: she got money for 1 lakh with the interest of 8000 rs per month which doesnt involve sum. She kept paying those 8000rs every month for 1 year by getting money from another money lender. So now totally she has paid for 10 months for 80,000rs which again doesnt involve the sum amount. Now after 10 months she stopped paying for 6 months, So now total comes to 1 lak sum + last 6 months interest of 48,000. So still 1 lakh 48,000 needs to be paid.

3. So the above example is for multiple people, Now people who have lended money for 80,000rs are coming to me and asking me money for 2 lakhs rupees. My mother says she has paid interst for 4 years and for last few months she didn't give interest, So total they are asking for 2 lakshs

So like this there are several people and i have not seen anyone till now and now people are coming to me asking for money. So do you understand my frustration.

Originally posted by : Manoj Chennai
	Helping Hand, You will not understand my situation. 1. In my first marriage. During mutal divorce, i was suppose to submit her jewels to her. But found that all her jewels are sold out by my mother and those were changed for dummy jewels 2. Eg: she got money for 1 lakh with the interest of 8000 rs per month which doesnt involve sum. She kept paying those 8000rs every month for 1 year by getting money from another money lender. So now totally she has paid for 10 months for 80,000rs which again doesnt involve the sum amount. Now after 10 months she stopped paying for 6 months, So now total comes to 1 lak sum + last 6 months interest of 48,000. So still 1 lakh 48,000 needs to be paid. 3. So the above example is for multiple people, Now people who have lended money for 80,000rs are coming to me and asking me money for 2 lakhs rupees. My mother says she has paid interst for 4 years and for last few months she didn't give interest, So total they are asking for 2 lakshs So like this there are several people and i have not seen anyone till now and now people are coming to me asking for money. So do you understand my frustration.

I absolutely understand your plight and situation.

Thats what, your debacle No.1 sucked out money, and it is continuing to affect everybodys life even now in form of debts.

The question is that of moral responsibility rather than legal.

Legally you need not worry about the debts that your parents took.  

You have to be shameless in such case, continue living where you are, inspite of people asking you to pay back money. 

If you cant tolerate such, simply abscond, dont come  back.

Now that your married life is secure you are thinking of getting rid of this debt headache.  What if your married life was again debacle?  What would you have done?  Your parents have taken loan to just cover up, its classical case of UDHAR KI ZINDAGI, to cover one debt take another and it has continued on and on.

Be aloof.  or be square. 

If you have conscience, make your parents understand your situation and clear of debts.  If not why do you care so much?  LIve a animal life.

As already pointed out: 

If you have not signed and loan document as Borrower, Co-Borrower, guarantor or financial pronote, you are legally not liable to pay.

As per Hindu Succession (Amendment) Act, there is no liability on son to pay father’s debt.

Rests are your own efforts.

If you wish you can release advertisements in two newspapers also, against lending to your parents.

Probably you won’t like and do it.

So as already pointed out;

Until you act firmly, to stop money being lent in your name, without your consent, and the share of property being disposed at throwaway prices, the situation may continue.   Instead of giving in to situation, resolve it once for all, amicably, preferably and stick to your stand.

Or sell your share in the property and settle down somewhere else.

You have no liability for the debts because of your parents except as to the property that hey may have transferred, if any, to you (fraudulently) to escape from their liability.