My father in law claiming my salary and my husband's salary


My father in law wants every single panny in his hand. According to him he is elder so he must have our salaries. He himself earns. He just want all the finacial control in his hand. I refused to give my salary. After that he behaved in a very rude way. He did not eat at home. He orderd his food from hotel. He said i disrespact him. After that i apolosied him. I said i am realy sorry if i hurt you. But tell me my fault, which words hurt you. He said leave that topic, you apoligised, i am ok. But from now every money form any source will be in my hand. You can ask for maoney when you need. I was shocked. It was all about money not about disrespact. I dont understand what should i do. It is so depressing. please suggest me a peacful way to deal this situation. Because if i would directly refuse he will easily blame me for disrepcting him again. I dont want to give my salary. 

 
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I think your father in-law ought to be thrown out of his own house, where you and your husband are residing and may be in near future your children also will, in order to have the financial control of your hard earned salary too. For me you look to be heartless. Now you may start abusing me also for being out right in 21st century.
 
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So according to you i should give my salary to my father in law? All bills and other expenditure on our home is is paying by us (me and my husband). My father in law spends his earned money on drinks. Yes he regulary DRINKS. Now can you please suggest me what should i do? I am fully contributing to our home already. When my sister in law come to our home than she gets suits or other things from her brother not from her father. My mother in law expired 14 years ago. And my sister in law said that he (my FIL) used to beat them after her mother got expired.:(

 
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My answer to your query is leave the house of your FIL, with your husband and children (if any). The fact also here is the passiveness of your husband, because he has not raised any query. It is only you who has come up with a one sided story, which cannot be believed because usually daughter in-laws not only in the olden days but even in the present modern days, abhor their father and mother in-laws, hence concept of joint family is on the verge of extinction. Yet sorry to say that no legal solution exists for the plenty of personal problems and your problem is one as such.
 
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Few months ago my husband wanted to leave the house. At that time I completely refused. I never thought this would happen in my life. I was married to my husband just one year ago. In just one year so many things happened. My sister in law is also married and she also suggest same thing. I again refused because he will be all alone after that. And I cannot do this. One thing is here cleared that daughter in laws are easily blamed persons for nuclear family. I was never in the favor of separation. I asked for a peaceful solution. And I never abhor my Father in Law. Every morning when leaving for job and after coming home i always great him. I used to great my parents so its my habit. Even we had given our salary last month but at that time we were empty hands. And It was very difficult month. So refused. I am not saying i will not give any money but not The Salary. We don’t have kids right now. But in future what will we do with empty hands?

 
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Madam Amandeep Kaur, sometimes we come across such critical problem, where no ready-made solution can be found. Your worries are very much respected, but since you have been very caring 'Dhee', a faithful wife and would also be loveable mother in future, then I hope you yourself would be able to come out of such ordeal. But, please don't loose your heart on such hiccups, which will go off with your love, passion and patience in the near future. Be wise and save money for your family's future but at the same time not to annoy your FATHER in-law. Regards.
 
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Thank You very much sir. Right now i have no idea what will I do. But I think should avoid direct refusal or God Knows.

 
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