i was married at the age of 17 under hindu laws.....but in documents my age is extended..its been 10 yrs..i have two kids...my husband provides me with all material aspects of life....he loves me as if i am just a trophy to him....i have found love in someone else...i want to file a divorce with my husband...and spend the rest of my life with the person i found who loves me like crazy given all constrains i have..the new man is well educated and he is not willing to take any step unless the legal complications are over...cause he is concerned bout adultery charges under section 497. pls help me out..its a matter of my life....to me my marriage for 10 yrs has been a legal prostitution...no feelings no love...i want to desperately get out of it because things are becoming unbearable for me...mutual consent seems a distant possibility cause my hubby got some property issues with my dad which he is not going to give up at any cost....what if i change my religion ????? will it get me a divorce???? 

Why do u want to leave your husband any particular reason????

You are saying that you are married for 10 yrs have 2 kids and ur husband loves u a lot and still you want to dump him for someone. For shameless females like there are many was to trouble a loving husband. You dont desevrve his love and affection so please tell him the truth that u found happiness in someone else and try sorting it out mutually. I know your husband will be heartbroken and will give u divorce as he loves u a lot and to make u happy he might even give u divorce. Please dont trouble a gud person like him by filing false cases against him for GOD's sake.

Changing of religion will not automatically dissolve your current marriage. It has to be dissolved under the law which governs you. The only way out I can see for you is mutual divorce if the man you love is scared of adultery charges.

Well advised by Pawan and Ashish regarding your husband's love and religion aspects. You have two kids from your hubby but found a new love in another man. Are you sure that the new lover will truly love a woman with two kids behind? Do you think your two kids are a cat or amouse to be abondened with your hubby who truly loves you? Aren't you ashame that you have ben ditching your husband all these days? Look before you leap. The grass on the other side may not be greener as you might imagine and may turn out to be a nightmare.

I am very sorry for you that you are given to marriage with your husband before you could mature enough to make a decision on your own to marry at the age of 17 years.  Legally if you do not invoke your rights within a year after attaining age of majority the marriage stands valid in the eyes of law.  If you did not like it you should have contested it immediately after attaining the age of majority i.e., 18 years.  However I feel even that age is too immatured to initiate on your own to take any legal action.  After many years you found/realized that you are not satisfied with your husband and found love in some other man.

But it would not be safe for you to venture for a new marriage if you are not standing on your own feet.  Leaving husband at this stage of life entails with the consequences of society abandoning you, including your parents.  When that happens nobody will be there to support you except your own earnings/property (if any) or your new husband.  If he ditches you, then you will be on roads or have to stand guilty at the doors of your parents and your life will become miserable.  And it is always advisable to rely on your own job than a husband for maintenance.  These days money is (always) more trustworthy than people. 

Hence I feel unless you are a working woman earning sufficiently for maintenance of you and your kids do not think of new marriage.  I am very sorry for you, but at this stage of life it is too late for you to think of divorce and new marriage if you are ordinary house-wife. 

Ashish has given you the right advise.

Yes ... it is possible if your husband accept it.

All the best.

@ Author,


If the question is of divorce then it is very easy in your brief to get divorce. Tell your 'faulty' father "that you have found a new b/f and thus give controverisal property to your legaly weded husband so that I can live with my  b/f as I am bored in my current marriage."

However, if you are still not that empowered then just today leave behind your kids and start "live-in" with your b/f but donot declare socially yourself as married to your b/f and or donot produce third child from your b/f. till divorce takes place. Legally no current law can do anything about your 'switch'.

Your current husband may file S. 9 RCR but since you are enjoying in your own words 'crazy love' with your b/f so his RCR case will eventually end up into divorce by simply not attending the court and ex-patyed following due process of the Court - what is the big deal here during such crazy love social practices now-a-days!.  Bigamy done by Hindu wife is not criminal offence!!!. Your b/f is not educted enough on this subject so it seems but you know well to spell out here which IPC section it comes under ! Bravo !!! Your husband if ropes your b/f to court then your b/f will walk free as "proving marriage" is essential ingridents and not living as "live-in" mind it. For live - in there is no law of the land which you must be better aware than us !

You see you are not that empowered as time pass women writers here will also say so (secretly in their PM's).

Some "social shikandis" here will obviously feel 'sorry' for you and since you claim to be empowered you will borrow Men's Rights Activists coined term "legal prostitution" into your agenda of seeking your freedom out from a 10 years old with 2 kids marriage. I will not blame your current empowernment level except when we the Men's Rights Activists use the word "legal prostitution" we specifically use it for today's empowered metro wives who unleash several criminal / civil cases for no reason on their husbands and his family / relatives side and your brief is not so rosy to justify borrowing our coinage to justify your special ends.
 

Also mind it what you are doing is not even bracketed under 'prostitution' but could be said that you are engaged into 'economics of arrangments" while still showcausing to the society that you and your legal husband keeps as "still married with kids ji" but me ji is having just a "chintu sa adventure outside legal Hindu marriage for fulfilling my idea of crazy love" which I am not getting from my current husband out of this marriage.. I respect only this sentiments and rest are over empowernments gone hayware thought process running 'crazy wild' during your harmonal changes phase. Your ideals are infact well reflected by Film producer Mahesh Bhatt in some of his yesterdays movies.

Empowered married women of today like you have offcourse kicked sacroscent Indian marriages into current days social demand / supply bracket of "Hindu marriage is a contract" and I per se thank contribution of such empowered woman in our society to inch such social Laws forward. Time pass women writers of LCI will comment endlessly if same thing a Hindu married man does due to probbaly their past histronics but the moment your nature of empowered well thought querries appear here for advise they will take a back stage thy name aji hum to cultured ladies hai yaha.

If you need any help in talking to your father to give away the controversial property and move out of marriage which as per you may be the only bone of contention to ask for  your freedom then do let us know so that a empowered metro wife's freedom could be sought and set as examples for today's other metro wives club in training to refer to such contemporary social briefs happy endings which controversial shikhandies smartly say "sorry about" and women writers here donot see social wrongs at all wearing rainbow glasses. 

Illustration:
Nina Rakheja (a Aussie LCI woman writer here making several well supported juicy empowering rounds) who herself says and her alma mater Roshni B subscribnes that she is married to a old Hindu fart via internet photo exhange but has a b/f and thus seeking to fulfil her "crazy love" and seeking freedom from that old fart". Lady become role model to Nina and several secret other admirers here and pay way for all their  social marrital freedoms too :-)

Moon:  Your boy friend is smart.  He is enjoying life with you (a married woman) telling lies and showing dreams.  There are many men out there who are blood suckers and would do anything to get a woman, especially those who are looking for some crazy love.   How can you trust the sincerity of your boy friend so easily or you are blinded by his love, gifts and other pleasures he gives to you ?

You look very naive.  If you are so hell bent on getting your new found love, you can resort to 498A/DV acts in motion.  Contact your local women activits, as they will be able to guide you through the entire process.  

Your boy friend has already committed adultery, and if your husband is watching this thread (I am sure he is!), he will file for divorce or commit suicide.