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Ravi (Consultant)     14 July 2016

Filling child mind against father

I was having son from 1st marriage; fought child custody till HC, because of Lawyer i was not able to continue and Son turn 18. fought almost for 13 years. Court and Lawyer judge dragged case.
Mother left him when he was only 4 year old and i also work Abroad.
Now i remarried, that after 8 years getting proper Divorce;
i asked one of my friends Daughter to talk to my son without mentioning my name; He told her

"his Dad left his Mother for other women, he was having Affair and now he is married to her"

Real truth is she was having Affair in her collage and continued even after marriage when i found out she filled 498A.

My question is can file any case on her for telling him False and untrue things to make him Hate me. As a Proof whatever he told in in Facebook chat.


Learning

 7 Replies

Sood   14 July 2016

You are going in wrong direction Mr. Ravi.... if u filled a case for this things he will be the one to save his mother . ... my view is u should have to talk to ur son directly and make him comfortable... for further in brief pm me

Ravi (Consultant)     14 July 2016

As he already Brain washed and filled with hatred, do you think he will listen my side of story, true or false. even if i show him the proofs he will not believe.
I have nothing against him,i just want him to know the TRUTH. and his mother should tell him the TRUTH

Ritwik (IT)     14 July 2016

Your case more of a psychological than legal one. it seems you were not in touch with your son for years. Which makes things more difficult for you. Rightly adviced by one here, talk to him directly and be patient. Try to show him that you care and thnigs may trun into your favor. And gradually he may be in a mental state to start acknowledging your emotions for him and then you can tell him the facts. 

Born Fighter (xxx)     14 July 2016

Ravi i can understand the paiin...

 

You fought divorce battle and custosy battle for 13+years, din't you have evidence to prove ur claims that ur wife had an affair from her college days OR did ur wife had/has any evidences to prove her claims against you ??

 

Either one of you or NONE has any proofs.......otherwise the battle for custody wouldnt have dragged for 13yrs+

 

Your son is educated and do you think he will merely believe in allegations ?? 

 

You have left no stone unturned in maligning ur ex-wife's characher and ur ex-wife did the same, bocos of which the custody battle went on for 13 long yrs.. Since the son was in her custody she suceeded in brainwashing his mind/heart.

 

Everyone makes mistakes in life, what if u speak to ur son and apologize to him for the pain he (son) has undergone due to ur problems with ur wife ???. When he needed you as a father you were busy fighting it out in the court, and what did you achieve from all this ????

To start with , Ask him to look at you as a friend and have an experience of you as a person first rather than discarding you based on allegations..

He will certainly not have those fatherly feelings for you and pls dont blame him for that. 

 

Start from here and eventually try and build trust in your son. Rest, affairs and all are normal sir, even ur son would have a few before he gets married. 

 

Most Important - Do not discuss ur wife with your son now, that topic is over and dont even dare and attempt to brain wash him once you both start talking ....Let me tell you if you try doing this your son will be gone forever....

 

Filing case and all................it seems u havent learnt any lesson from ur past mistakes, courts are meant for giving dates, so dont fall in trap again.

 

Win people and relations by Love than getting into a legal battle at drop of a hat for every conflict in Life !!

 

Lastly if ur son shows no interest, then tell him you will not chase him however ur doors are open for him whenever he would need you as a father !!!  Move on then, u have a family....invest ur energy for people who are there with you ....

All the Best !!!

 

 

JustAdvisor (IT)     14 July 2016

Facebook Chat is of no value because that is your son's version of the story. it doesn't implicate your wife as per evidence act. Hearsay evidence is no evidence. you never contacted your son for all these years and are now on a guilt trip when age is not on your side. it is unlikely that your son will be friends with you but you may always try without being too intrusive.

Ravi (Consultant)     14 July 2016

AS i was not in India, all lawyers said i wil not get Child, still after he is 5 i filled visitation when i am india. i went upto HC just to get visitation. even she never came to court. and even b4 her lawyer say something Judge himself denying everything to me.

i kept 10 Lakh deposit, just to visit once and take him home. This news on all news papers and TV. that how our biased judiciary is.

She used 498A to stop me from approching her, about her Affair her own class mate told me and nieghbours seen someone was coming when i was in office and she used to close windows.

she has no evidence against me coz i never had any Affair at all, but society listen to women even she is telling lies.

i got ex parte Divorce, it was delayed for 2 year becuase when court changed my file was missing for 2 years.

i am not after him, i just wanted him to know the truth; i showed him the way to my home and who are my people, it upto him, if he wanted. i just pray God to give him wisdom to know the truth.

but i always wanted to contact him and meet him, the efforts i took only me knows.

A walk alone (-)     14 July 2016

Brother in any divorce only child suffer. You know you have done efforts but it useless. Can you tell me where were you when your child needs you in childhood? Fighting case? Do you fulfill father duty? Why dnt your child blame you?Now its long time your child brainwash totally. If you file any case you child will be first one to stand against you. Your child will never believe on your truth. As you already move on in life then dnt drag your past. As long as you drag your past you will only get pain. These things about your child you should think before divorce. Be strong and think in that way you will not chase your child but your door will always be open when he needs father.

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