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Whenindoubt (Manager)     26 May 2011

Complicated marriage- need advise

Had a love marriage 5 years back after a long-distance courtship of 1year, only to realise that I was married to a compulsive alcoholic with an equally complex personality. In the last 5 years we have done nothing but fight, fight and fight due to his alcoholism..however, neither is he willing to go to into therapy, nor does he accept that he is addicted. This has caused the families to breakup, he lost his job, and also incurred a lot of liabilities. He has not been working for the last 2 years and I have been supporting all his bills. I work in the Private sector and earn fairly well, but my bank balance is almost nil bearing my own and my husband's expenses. His drinking has not gone down and no matter what, he drinks and lies and drinks and makes false promises only to break them again. I've finally decided to separate and want to know:

1. How do I claim for all the money I spent for him? I cannot claim for the mental harassment I underwent because of him, but getting back what I spent is the least I can expect..

2. Can I get him to sign an indemnity stating that I am not responsible for any liabilities that he has incurred..lest he defaults on payments and the creditors land at my house?

3. In case he refuses to give me something in writing, how do I safeguard myself from the above? Do I need to make some public declaration in a newspaper or magazine stating that I am not responsible for any of his liabilities?

4. Do I really need to take a divorce, else it would suffice if we just separate and live our lives? I do not want to get into any legal hassles over this..

Please let me know..I'm heartbroken, harassed and really really sad.



Learning

 12 Replies

zimmerzapper (student)     26 May 2011

i can't understand why you don't want divorce. divorce will remove most of your problems in one clean sweep. 1 legal hassle is better than 3 or more legal hassles.

 

I'm not a legal expert or lawyer.

RohitChhaba (n/a)     26 May 2011

1. for issue  1 you cannot ask for what you have spent on him

2.for issue number 2,3,4  PLEASE FILE DIVORCE.

hire a good lawyer and leave everything on him (after hireing a doctor you dont operate yourself) TRUST ME

Call me if you (+919928110336) have issues so that i can make you understand


(Guest)

1. YOU CAN CLAIM THE MONEY FROM HIS AS COMPENSATION/RECOVERY OF MONEY.

2. YOUR HUSBAND WILL NOT SIGN SUCH AN INSTRUMENT

3. yOU CAN ALSO ISSUE A PUBLIC NOTICE IN THE LOCAL NEWSPAPERS AND PAMPHLETS WTH HELP OF A LAWYER.

4. YOU CAN ALSO FILE A DIVORCE CASE WITH INTERIM MAINTENANCE PETITION ON THE GROUNDS OF CRUELTY.

 

FURTHER DETAILS MAIL.ME .

Advocate M.Bhadra   26 May 2011

You may file suit for judicial seperation for the time being with claiming interim maintenance and file a another Maintenance case in a magistrate court,finaly you have to decide to file a divoce suit.Notice in a local newspaper announce discharge all liabilities that is your's husband.

Ambika (NA)     26 May 2011

you may not get maintenance as you are earning enough to support yourself and your family and your husband is wihtout job. 

To me this raises an interesting question . Husband has been dissipating money on drinking and placed the burden of running the family on his wife, not to talk about mental harassment dut to his alcoholism. Husband under HMA may claim maintenance amount from his wife, because he is unemployed. In view of his addiction, would she has to foot his bills? Perhaps so minus his drinking expenses? 

Whenindoubt , file a case against him under DV act and claim compensation for all that you have gone through and secure a protection order and other releifs that you need to seek. 

Nirupom Dutta (advocate)     26 May 2011

you can claim the money as recovery of money, also can file a DV case including alimony and maintainance..

Ambika (NA)     26 May 2011

Streedhan can be claimed , but if a wife runs the household out of her income and delays in taking action against her alcoholic husband, she can claim compensation due to mental harassment that she had gone through, but not recovery of the spent money on household expenses, or can she? 

9587744142ShivShanker saini (Advocate)     26 May 2011

only 1 solutions is there that you have to meet a lawyer in your area. we ppl from  here cant give you any relife..

still if if you have any question may call me on 0958774142


(Guest)

Hi whenindoubt, make sure you don't have any joint accounts or joint/ add on credit cards. Make sure you don't have credit facility/ or your accounts cannot be overdrawn, as he might get a loan which you both would be liable to pay off


(Guest)

Please tell me you didn't find him on shaadi.com? It is the adda of fake people.

1 Like

Ambika (NA)     26 May 2011

Good advice by Uma.

1 Like

(Guest)

Dear client,

on first aspect, u can claim the money whatever u spend for him or he borrowed form u. but u can't claim any future maintainance s u r working person.

further, if u finally dicide to get divorce from her, it will be all done.. y mutually or y some other modes..

pls get in touch for any further info., better u call me or mail me the entire thing.

Dear friend,

ur matter is incomplete in itself, pls explain clearly,
rest, ur wife is legally entitle to take her share.
furhter, its better to call me or clear all the things.

 

Manoj kumar,
Advocates,
Delhi High Court,
Delhi.
Ph: 09310443650

Email: advocates.agra@gmail.com

"Speak less to the people whom you like most... Because if they can't understand your silence ......They can never understand your words...!!"

- Show quoted text -


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